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Addiction Transfer?



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Jack... I think I love you! haha

Your anaylses never seem to falter right to the deepest part of the issue....

SO yes, prior to surgery, I went home every day and ate while sitting in front of the good ol' tv... now I go home, change and go the gym or my boyfriends, or to a friends house... so its really all the same when you really think about it.

So true....

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I have definitely changed my addictions- I am SO not the exception. I have switched my habits though - continously and sometimes am not conscience I am addicted- which is worse... I binge drink 3-4 nights a week with friends, can blow $700 in one week, exercise HARD CORE 6 times in a week, and can go through guys like no tomorrow. But I am also 22, a graduate student, and finally enjoying a real social life in New York City. So sometimes, I'm not sure if I'm doing it as an addiction, or as a young adult.

I have talked to my therapist about this and she says that it will probably happen, and as long as it doesn't get TOO far out of control, it's ok. I do love dating now though!

ROck-on!---you are young--and now is the time--to have a lot of fun--just be carful and watch your drinking and be safe--use a condom--i don't want to sound like a mom---but I am a New Yorker --so be safe have a lot of fun---and have some fun for me!!!!!:whoo:

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lol crazyace! I go to school in NYC so I know how it is up there... so tempting to party EVERY night.... don't worry I'm careful... I'm been in Manhattan for 5 years- this is gonna be my 6th year there, so it feels like I'm also a New Yorka!

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Oh and I go through periods of COMPLETE control of what goes in my mouth and body. Some weeks- its like my body is a temple, and some times its like I couldn't care less. Right now, I am in control and I like it!

Wow... have you been checked out for bi-polar disorder? What you described concerns me that you show signs of it. It's prevalent in my family and it sounded eerily familiar... :phanvan

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Regarding transferrng addictions: as some of you know I'm still "pre-band" and yesterday I had the psych eval with a PhD psychologist. His input: he has observed that those people who gained weight in adulthood (as opposed to those who were obese children) do better after weight loss surgery than those in the 'obese-as-children' group. He hypothesizes that fat children suffer more blows to their developing self image, their "core self" (from disapproving parents or teasing from other kids) that causes them to carry more baggage into adulthood, in terms of psychological damage that leads to addictive behavior. Baggage that must be worked though, to be successful at surgical weight loss. Certainly people who gain weight after reaching adulthood suffer as well, fat prejudice is rampant and loss of beauty/good health is a legitimate loss, but he said that being "fat" for this group is more like "what has happened to me" as opposed to "who I am".

What do you guys think of this? He also asked me what food meant to me, and I said "comfort" and when he asked me what I would substitute for food to comfort myself, my response was that I would prefer to choose NO other substitute, but rather to get to the root of the discomfort though counseling. His response: he said rather than substituting addictions in order to find comfort, or even therapy to root out the source of discomfort....... it is more important to learn (though experience) that discomfort isn't going to kill you -- and to learn to "ride it out" is the real key to freedom. He said that addicts have an unrealistic fear of discomfort that drives them to do something - anything to avoid feeling the discomfort. Thats why people switch addictions. So his suggestion for me was to come to therapy and experience discomfort and "learn to ride the wave" of it ..... without seeking relief. As we talked, I felt my discomfort increasing already and I was wishing there was a bowl of chips and dip for me to turn my attention to, but of course there wasn't. I had the urge to get up and pace in the room, but didn't since this was my pre surgery psych eval and I didn't want to ruin my chances for surgery by alarming the psychologist. It was interesting though, and I did survive that small bout of discomfort after all.

I am also reading a book called "Shrink Yourself" which is written by a psychiatrist at UCLA school of medicine. His theory is that compulsive overeating is rooted in feelings of powerlessness. I've yet to get into the nuts and bolts of the book, but the concept intrigues me. He has a website : www.shrinkyourself.com, where he has an online 12-week program for working though his chapters (with workbook, online support, and more) and getting at the causes and manifestations of "powerlessness" and how finding your power can free you from food obsession.

This topic is timely for all of us, and I believe an important discussion point. Thoughts?

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Hey Wendy... thanks for the info about bi-polar... I was treated for major depression and then the prozac had the opposite effect and I got really High from it so maybe thats why... they did diagnose me with borderline personality disorder though and I had to go through group sessions and such.. I seem to be ok and completely happy until something major changes in my life and then all of the sudden I'm depressed or a crazy partier again. SO maybe it is bipolar instead of the other stuff. I do know that I can change the way I feel by changing my outlook, so I do seem to have some control over it.

I'll have to think about that though... If I do have bipolar I can go MONTHS between highs and lows. and the lows arent really that bad, but the highs are rediculus!

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Actually Leona06 your symptoms are classic bipolar. Getting wired on antidepressants like Prozac is a classic symptom. It is very common for the "highs" to be more powerful (and sometimes hard to control) than the lows, and yes...... they are usually months apart. Some people only have a "manic" period or a "depressed" period once a year even. Bipolar disorder is a medical condition that needs medication to treat. You'll miss your "highs" but your life will be in your control and you won't suffer the fallout from bad credit, DUI's, STD's and all the things that could happen when you're way "high" on life. Borderline Personality D/O is very stubborn and resistant to treatment. It can't be "proven" it's just a hunch on the part of the counselor or psychiatrist given your symptoms and behavior. They can see if you're bipolar by trying you on medication and seeing if it helps. I'd recommend you follow through on that. My information comes from my employment as a psychiatric nurse.

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Well, I go back to school in September, I'll have insurance again, so I will check out my options with that... I do see a therapist though in NYC who deals with people with body image issues and who have had WLS (she also had lapband)... but she has never said anything about maybe having bipolar. When they diagnosed me with borderline in Dec 02, and they put me on the prozac- every time I did something out of the ordinary they would up the dosage until I was at 60mg a day- the max dose. Then I just quit taking it because I started feeling better and sometimes I did crazy things like crossing the street without looking and drinking entire bottles of alcohol (think massive alcohol poisoning), then when I stopped it, and became involved with school (student affairs stuff), I basically had no problems. So its would make complete sense that I am bipolar, but I feel like I have a good sense of control over it at this point. I will talk to my therapist about it in September though.

Although I'm not sure if I would want to upset my schooling with regulating medication if I am completely fine in school. I am thought of as one of the favorites- I'm an opera singer getting my masters and The Opera Office casts me in everything and even asks for little favors from me, and there are only a select that has that honor, so we'll see! Life is good, though... life is good.

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Hey--My boyfriend works at the Met Opera house in NYC--small world eh?--Who is your doctor in NYC? Do you have a good PCP and lap-band Doc?--I am having my lap-band on Aug 13 at NYU with Dr. Ren. I am starving on the pre-op diet right now.

But I have a family history of Bi-polar disorder and that is why I like this thread--I do medicate my self with food. And I am worried about a new addiction after the wieght loss.

There are free group meetings at NYU hospital--The psych that I saw told me to see someone after my surgery because he thought that I might have difficulity being thin--so thought I would give the group thing a try.

Stomach Stapling, Gastric Bypass - Support Groups, Psychotherapy - Lap-Band Surgery, NYU Medical Center

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Thanks crazyace! I actually had my surgery in Maryland with Dr. Singh. I have a friend who is getting the surgery with Dr. Ren on Monday, so maybe we'll go to the support groups together. I'll be back in NYC at the end of August... It is such a small world! I went to Juilliard for undergrad and now I'm an Manhattan School of Music, so maybe I know him... well, maybe I'll see you at the meetings if I can make them!

Good luck on the 13th!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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