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So as I lay here at 1 am thinking about what is about to be done to my body. I know it's normal to feel nervous. But i kinda feel bad for the reasons I am feeling nervous. It's kinda petty really. I know the whole "I'm doing it to get healthy" speal but deep down I just want to feel like a normal person who isn't the heaviest person in the room. I don't want to be the fat funny friend that is always single. The everyone thinks I'm gay because I have never had a boyfriend. ( I'm not hating on gay people please don't take it like I am) does anyone else feel bad for thinking this way? I can't be the only one.

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You are most certainly not the only one that feels this way. Yes we are doing this for our health but we all are also doing it to look better, to no longer stand out for all the wrong reasons.

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Yes we are doing this for our health. We have our physical health that the surgery will help with diabetes and high blood pressure, sleep apnea and all the other issues that we face. But there is also our mental health. I'm sure we all have stories of feeling out of place because of our weight. Not wanting to do certain things because we're afraid we won't fit in the seat or not wanting to participate in a sporting event because of how we might look. But we are taking the steps that we need to physically and mentally make us better people. And in turn that will take care of our spiritual being because we will be much happier and healthier! You are not alone by any means. There are 1000s of people in your shoes (including me) but look at it this way at least you are brave enough to say it!

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Hi. I've tried to avoid thinking about what happens in the surgery because I feel very queasy about operations of any kind. I have avoided reading descriptions or looking at diagrams of what will happen and have really focused on the practical things I will need to do after surgery. That has helped me to not freak out about it. ????

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ToniMarie05, I completed understand! You're definitely not alone. I mentioned in a previous post that a pic was my reality check. I couldn't believe it. I realized what I'd done to myself. WELL NO MORE! Yes I truly want to be healthy, but I also want to feel sexy again. I want to wear something that cute, not because it's black and comfortable. I'm getting married next year, I refuse to walk down the aisle like this. So you see we all want to be healthy, but yes deep down we have reasons for vanity as well. I was once told, you need 2 things in life happiness and your health. With this surgery, you can have both. ????

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ToniMarie05 I truly understand how you feel I'm certainly doing this for my health but also so I will no longer have to feel like blob rolling around the office not being able to wear the latest style cause they dont sell it in my size looking for the biggest chair in the conference room so it doesn't pinch my hips all in all you are certainly not alone

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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