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So i was talking to my PCP, yesterday and He asked me this question.

"what is the biggest thing you've learned about yourself since the surgery?"

It is a tough question.

Thinking about it, I would have to say, that I Don't need food to be happy.

How would you answer that question?

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That I had an unhealthy relationship with food. It isn't a social event or just something to do when I am bored. That I would rather be healthy than fat. I am sure there are more lessons to come but that is a start!

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I really like structure. It gives me this weird high when I have all my meals planned and fridge stocked with healthy food.< /p>

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That I can do this new lifestyle.

That I do much better with my eating when I drink at least 2 Protein shakes a day. I can't get all my Protein in without them and still stay within my calorie range.

That even with the restriction of my sleeve, I still battle with head hunger and stress eating at work; fortunately, it's not every day or even every week, but it still crops up.

I know, that's more than one thing :P , but they're the things foremost in my mind right now.

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That being too fat was the least of my problems.

And surprise! I could begin changing all my other flaws as well and live to tell about it.

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That I want to live a longer life - more than I want that next big meal :)

-RC-

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I've learned that I can now control food vs it controlling me.

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I learned two things! I got my nose pierced a year and a half ago. And i realized i did it to hopefully have people pay attention to my face and not my body. Also this is why i would dye my hair crazy colors.

And i learned i have a hardcore sugar addiction. Im a baker so im always around it and i have zero will power but im trying. Its a constint battle everyday at work.

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That I have so much more time now that I don't spend every waking our thinking about what I am going to eat next. Like @@SeahawksFan said, I like structure.

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Three things.....

That I love food and always will.

That I can actually deal with life without drinking several cocktails every night.

That I look hot in Cruel Girl Size 5 slim fit jeans!

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I've learned so much. I agree that I learned I don't need food to be happy. I also learned that I am beautiful inside and out. Even if I don't often feel it. The hard lessons came too. I learned what food addiction looks like when you are on the outside looking in. That was a hard one because it made me reflect on my whole family. But I never voice anything negative. My filter is strongly in place.

I've learned how to really love myself and everyone around me. And it's the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I don't avoid mirrors and I give out lots of free hugs.

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Although I knew being obese was very stressful for me, I had no idea how very stressful it was.

I have so much more empathy for heavy people now than I ever did before, even when I was one of them.

As I've said before, I have NO idea how I could function at all when I weighed almost 90 pounds more than I do so.

But I'm afraid the answer to rhetorical question is: Not very well at all.

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I feel the exact same way. I always had empathy for anyone who was obese as my mother and pretty much all in her family suffer from it. But now having been 135 pounds larger I see people suffering with it and my first thought is "OMG that poor thing" as a society I wish obesity was viewed as the true disease it is, and not as a weakness of character or that we are lazy , etc. food is an addiction you can not recover from but rather one you have to master and I feel my long term success is gonna involve a lifetime of respecting food and not making it my best friend again. Love to all of you in our wonderful community. The support I get here is top notch and helps to keep me focused and on the straight and narrow

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That Portion Control is my biggest issue.

When I was going through the classes, the class leader kept talking about how to avoid donuts in the break room (I hate donuts), how to make better fast food choices (I don't eat fast food), cutting out soda (I don't drink soda), not getting chips from the vending machine (not really a fan of chips), etc. I was getting frustrated because all of those issues were not MY issues so I was starting to wonder how I had gotten myself into this situation. When I mentioned this to her, she said that maybe portion control was my issue. And once she mentioned it, it all made perfect sense. And maybe I knew deep down inside that how much I was eating was the problem but I think hearing it from someone else confirmed what my problem was.

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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