Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Got told by a coworker today that I'm taking the "easy way"



Recommended Posts

I've learned to not really care.... At first to be honest I was very concerned about what others would think or say about me having surgery but then when I started losing the weight and feeling so much better, I got more confident I guess. I just realized this isn't about them... It's about me, and God, and that is it. What I have found that works perfectly is to beat them to the punch by announcing that fact first... I say something like "When I first had this done I was worried that people would think I was taking the easy way out, but it is sooo not easy, ...and now I really don't care what anyone thinks anyways because I feel so much better!" That usually entices people to keep their nasty lil opinions to themselves. (They probably talk behind my back, but again I don't care) :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It reminds me of that thing people are always saying......"I know how you feel".......no they don't....they just say it.

And I find that typically the ones making comments about how easy or unnecessary something is........is from someone that knows very little or has never experienced anything remotely similar or comparable.

Jerr Bear, if for no other reason.....the part where you refer to the risk of death, makes this urgently necessary. And anyone that doesn't get that.....can go *&%k themselves. ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am heading back to work next week. I am wondering how I am going to handle this sort of thing. I work in a restaurant with so many repeat customers who come through sometimes 3 or 4 times a day. A lot of them are doctors and health care workers from the hospitals nearby. I have been working there for 3 years so everyone knows me. I am not to worried about the doctors making comments, but the other customers are going to comment when they see me losing weight. I am not in a position to tell anyone to f**k off. I have not told people at work and took vacation time to recover. I just know it is going to be a big topic. I did want to change jobs anyway.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am heading back to work next week. I am wondering how I am going to handle this sort of thing. I work in a restaurant with so many repeat customers who come through sometimes 3 or 4 times a day. A lot of them are doctors and health care workers from the hospitals nearby. I have been working there for 3 years so everyone knows me. I am not to worried about the doctors making comments, but the other customers are going to comment when they see me losing weight. I am not in a position to tell anyone to f**k off. I have not told people at work and took vacation time to recover. I just know it is going to be a big topic. I did want to change jobs anyway.

Just give them the truth. Your eating right and exercising. No one needs to know anything more. And if pressed just say you have another customer.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@Ms. Reid,

You dont have to switch jobs or make up any excuses for when people have questions. "I'm eating less and moving more, thanks for noticing." If you're not comfortable telling people you've had surgery, then that's that. It's not their business to know and you shouldn't be made to feel uncomfortable.

As I get closer to my actual surgery date, the few people I have told have been absolutely supportive and those are the people whose voices matter. People I work with and random friends of friends I encounter as the days wear on, those people's opinons and thoughts don't mean anything to me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wish there was a "Love" button for your post.

What these people don't understand (because most have never lived it) is that this is FAR From easy. I am 34, when I was 8 1/2 months pregnant with My now 4 yr old son my Doc told me that I would never live to see him graduate. I am 5'9 and I was at 320lbs at that point. I have had personal trainers, I have done the Optifast diet (liquid), I have done so much and yes I did lose weight 80-90 lbs...my problem, I was ALWAYS hungry. I never had the switch turn off in my head that said hey you just ate, you can't be hungry anymore. THIS provided that switch. I had the Sleeve surgery done almost 10 months ago, I am down 134 lbs and I am LOVING Life.

Heres the other thing...we aren't doing this for that "guy" at work, their opinions are just that. I am doing this for me, for my family, for that damn doc who told me I wouldn't see my son graduate high school, for the darn operators of the rides at Disneyworld and local parks that gave me a look of disgust when I had to leave a ride because I was to big to get on, for the clerks at Lane bryant that I will never have to see again! this is MY time.

This might seem like the easy way out but it is so far from it. I would love to give you a high five, you have made a tough decision to fight for you! LIve for you and your family and forget about all the jerks in the world who have to rain on our parade. I congratulate you! WE will all do this together!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I got the same comments so I didn't tell many people at first. These kind of " know it alls" lurk in all of our offices I suppose. My office busy body now is self- appointed as the food Police anytime we have an office potluck or treats for a birthday. Always wants to know what I eat and if I am going to slip up. I laugh it off now. It is clear that their own lives are missing something and their obsession with mine is a form of flattery. ha ha

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You owe noone an explanation. I also have over 200 to lose. The pre-op diet was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I am 1 week post op and eating is a chore. So screw judgemental people and their thoughts. I wouldn't have explained anything to him. At that point I would have said, "Why do you ask?" Do not explain yourself to anyone at work. I don't plan to when I return in a month. If they dare ask, I will say the same thing. It's not a rude response but it is rude to ask someone about their health. How dare that guy approach you, ugh!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Your coworkers needs to have several seats! Voluntarily going under anesthesia and the knife and then going from eating/drinkingwhat you want to newborn/infant stages of eating is in NO way the east way out. Doing absolutely nothing is the easy way out....but that would end in death! We choose to live and the steps it takes to do that aren't easy!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@Jerr_Bear - I like your professionalism. Sometimes the best response is no response.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

For those of you who actually care about being polite, unlike me, here's a possible answer for you: "well of course I'm taking the easy way, my parents always taught me to work smarter, not harder". Said with a smile, this comes off very nicely.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've been on this journey since August, getting my surgery in 5 days.... I have had family and my best friend, and strangers tell me I am taking the easy way out, and why can't I just stick to the diet if I've done well enough on it this far. Honestly - I have so much more respect for the people who endure these surgeries from lapband to sleeve to bypass, etc.

From the pre diets, testing, liquid phases.... to surgery, pain meds, exercising, and complications.,... to having to change our ENTIRE lives forever for this TOOL we take on so we don't fall back into bad habits....

I respect, and have so much awe for those who have preceded us in getting these surgeries and working hard to get their lives back from years of weight issues.

Screw those who think less of us. We are amazing and we are stronger than any person who "can just do the diets and go to the gym".

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I swear to everything holy, I will get my first trip in a police car for assault charges if one person utters those words to me after the week I have had. Somebody set up a bail fund for me. Lol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@kyrickchick64 LOL i would not blame you one bit.....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

People will never understand the metabolic cycle of obesity....not our job to explain. If dieting and exercising worked for everybody, no one would be fat or unhealthy.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • vsg.with.sharon

      Hey everyone!
      I’m new here! Looking for some friends! 🥰
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×