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Celebrating a death tonight

Mrs. Reid

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Mrs. Reid    392

Mrs. Reid
Posted

I have been listening to Dr. Duc Vuong's podcast about successful wls patients. He has one of the highest success rates with wls patients in the country. What he says about the one thing that a patient can do to insure success at weight loss and keeping the weight off is to let the overweight food addicted person you once were die. Just let her die. So tonight I lit the candles all over my house....I brought the last alcohol I will drink in a while. I toasted all the coping mechanisms that kept me safe from harm...the fat that kept me unattractive to the men who would abuse me.....the food that made me feel better on cold lonely nights. The thick layer of distance I put between me and the cruelty of the world. And I said goodbye. It is sad, it is hard, I'm not sure how I am going to cope without that protective false self to keep me safe. But she's dead and I am going to let her die. I hope you will all join me in saying "Thank you fat self for all the years of keeping me safe and invisible from the world. But now I'm old enough, strong enough and experienced enough to take care of myself without you."

Ashes to ashes

Dust to dust

Goodbye.

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harley_quinn25    80

harley_quinn25
Posted

So deep! I love it. I'm wit u!!

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cnxn4    7

cnxn4
Posted

That's some good advice. I never looked at it that way. I'm with you on that. I'm getting sleeved on the 19th. I'm thinking of it as a birthday now. Thank you!

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mykdzmom    388

mykdzmom
Posted

Cheers!

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finediva    979

finediva
Posted

Wow! I felt like I was right there with you. But what I was really feeling was the truth in your well written words. The strong emotions your post stirred up was unexpected. Thanks.

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Salonboi    353

Salonboi
Posted (edited)

.

Edited by Salonboi

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Salonboi    353

Salonboi
Posted (edited)

.

Edited by Salonboi

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Flygirl123    150

Flygirl123
Posted

Your words brought me to tears. Such a profound & thought provoking post. Thank you for opening up your heart & sharing your truth. I'm going to listen to the dr pod cast. Then find a way to mourn the loss of my fat self.

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Mrs. Reid    392

Mrs. Reid
Posted

Thank you all for your kind words. It was great to get that out. So often I have ate through my feelings. I deserve to be heard.

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minniegirl    258

minniegirl
Posted

GOOD STUFF!!

What an inspiration ():-)

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whirlwen    65

whirlwen
Posted

Thank you for this! I have worried a lot about how my life will be without food as a source of comfort and protection. I just downloaded the podcasts and plan to listen to them today and spend some time contemplating the death of my pre-sleeve self.

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smile121    66

smile121
Posted

I love this! And I feel the same way!!! It is time to evolve past that scared girl, and mourn the loss of her. Wonderful post!!!

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Go To Topic Listing PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A

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    • LeighaTR

      LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.

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