Hi, All!

I am 13 months out and I'm only 3 pounds away from my goal of being in a 'normal' bmi range. At this point, I'm calling it good.

The thing is, I have been in this mental weight loss mode since I was 7 years old; that's 27 years of constantly monitoring how/what I eat in order to lose weight. I have never, to my recollection, not had constant thoughts of "I want to be thin."

Well now I am and I'm not sure how to get out of that head space. Of course, I'll be talking to my therapist about it, but I'd like to hear from other bariatric patients as well. Keep in mind, this isn't an issue of not thinking I 'look good', or not seeing my progress or anything like that. Its more of mentality of continuing to lose weight even though I don't need to just because I haven't ever known any other way of life.

Any advice??

Nope. I have the same issue. Been trying to lose weight my entire life. Still trying to get to goal. My advice is to try and enjoy your new self but i've found that I have to stay vigilant about what I eat and drink because it's actually very easy to regain some weight.

I am not sure I fully understand your question. My sleeve was 3 years ago, I have been maintaining for almost 2 years. I feel like i NEED to keep focus on weight management to avoid regain. I dont think it is abnormal, ALL of my trim/thin girlfriends over the age of 40 are very very focused on weight management because the pounds can creep on so easily. I feel I have a healthy diligence - I don't freak out over being up a few pounds or down a few pounds, but I monitor it and clothing sizes to keep it from getting away from me. And I find, especially as time goes on, that I basiclaly need to keep doing what i used to do.... in other words, maintenance isn't THAT different than losing weight I just have a little more leeway in terms of eating a bit more and a bit more carby food than I did while losing.

Congratulations on your healthy BMI!

I had to chuckle a little when I read that. I still find myself thinking "I should try that" every time I see a weight loss commercial or see a show about how to lose weight, or read some new fabulous weight loss method in a magazine. I get excited for a minute to see there is new research on obesity drugs. Then, after a second, I realize that I don't need to do that anymore. I am still thrilled with that realization, every time it happens, but it kind of surprises me at how it's ingrained! I just shift to knowing that I've found a way to be thin, and I have to keep doing that, and it's working for me. I think over time my mind will adjust as this lifestyle becomes more ingrained than the old.

I know what you mean, although I have accepted that the only way I stay thin is to be 100% vigilant. In the past, I have gotten to the weight I'm at now and decided, woohoo, I'm cute again, time to party- then 50 pounds later I wonder what happened. I am far happier when I am in weight loss mode, because when I just try to maintain I tend to let myself get away with things I shouldn't. I am 4 pounds from goal, but after that I will probably drop my goal just a bit lower, because I find that I can work at about 75% of my weight loss effort and lose 2-3 pounds a month, 50% effort and I can maintain, but any less than that, and bam, I gain weight all over again.

It is a little depressing to think that for the rest of my life I will always have to be careful about food, but like CowgirlJane said, all of the women I know who are thin and over 30-35 are only thin because they are extremely careful with what they eat and how they workout. I suppose it isn't just a bariatric problem, but metabolism is a bit of a B for all of us as we get older.

I believe the only way that I have a chance of maintaining my weight loss is to 1) stay in weight loss mode and reach a new, lower goal to give me some bounce room, and 2) Once I reach my new goal, watch my weight and eating habits as carefully in maintenance as I did while trying to lose weight. That is what the thin ladies I know do everyday. This does not mean I can never have any high calorie foods, I just have to fit them in to my planned allotment.

I am four years out and still have that mentality.

The weeks I let go of that mentality, I gain. Don't sweat it, just call it maintinance in stead.

LumpySpacePrincess,

If I understand what you are saying--

For me at almost 4 years out, as we approach the New Year, I STILL find it so hard to believe that I (me?, can't be), no longer have any need to make a New Year's Resolution to lose weight like I did EVERY YEAR OF MY LIFE (and then beat myself up when I failed of course)! I think it's all just part of adjusting to the GOOD things about our new lifestyle that we continue to discover day by day, month by month, year by year. Enjoy every single one of them. . .!