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Let me set the stage: I'm an avid baker. I plan on opening a bakery some day and even though I was sleeved a little under 3 weeks ago doesn't mean I'm going to stop baking. It took me a long time to develop a new relationship with food. Over the course of the 9 months pre-op, I started to associate food with sustenance and not something that made me happy. Baking makes me happy but not the way a half of pizza use to.

I recently been testing some recipes for the holidays since I plan on baking some goodies as presents. I posted a few pictures to my face book and I had a few people telling me I should be eating pie and cupcakes.

Now I want to be very clear, I didn't post pictures of me eating them just the end product and I haven't had any of baked goods in over 2 months. It really annoyed me because I know what I can and can not be eating. Its frustrating when people who haven't gone through the process or have never had any problem with their weight seem to always have an opinion on how I can be successful.

I feel like everyone is watching what I eat.... Anyone else feel this way?

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This is such a wonderful topic! Everyone at work knows I've had the surgery and most coworkers seem to "know someone" who has had the surgery. Some coworkers do have many opinions based on what they think they remember their friend did for their pre- and post-surgery diets. They also based their opinions on different types of surgeries they've heard about, none of which matters when I have a primary care physician, a surgeon, and a nutritionist telling me what's best for me after sleeve surgery.

I do get alot of "Can you eat that?" type questions. I almost always say, "I can eat just about anything that fits in my mouth, I'm just selective about what I eat now."

I did have a few friends and coworkers see my lunch and comment, "Wow, that's more than I thought you could eat." How they see 4oz of Protein as "more than they thought" seems crazy to me. I think they've heard how some people can only eat a couple ounces just after surgery and construed that to mean "forever." I find that sort of statement rather rude also.

Overall, people have been very supportive and I don't think the comments come from a bad place. The somewhat negative comments seem to be based more on what they thought they new about the surgery and pre- and post-op diets.

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Yeah, I know most their comments or questions are coming from a place of ignorance because obviously they just don't know but it is still rude. I guess I'm going to have get use to explain my sleeves limits. Thanks for your reply.

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I did not tell any of my friends that I had the gastric sleeve because everyone has an opinion and I did not want to hear it. Everyone thinks I am on a diet and doing real well (LOL). Tell your friends that it is none of their business and to go take a hike!!!!

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It is really funny, (read strange) how everyone has an opinion about what you should and should not be doing once you make the choice to take control of your life. I personally applaud you for your recognizing the need for a new relationship with food as well for understanding that a new relationship does nor equate to a "break up" from things you enjoy. I for one have always loved to cook, and just because I limit what I cook for myself, it does not limit what I cook for family and friends. Hang on to you dreams, your loves and your life. One thing I have learned from the wise sages here is that it is not only possible, but motivational to know that this life change is not a life limitation, but a life affirmation. We can have healthy, and fulfilling lives and for those who don't get it, I am truly sorry!

All the best!

R.

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Let me set the stage: I'm an avid baker. I plan on opening a bakery some day and even though I was sleeved a little under 3 weeks ago doesn't mean I'm going to stop baking. It took me a long time to develop a new relationship with food. Over the course of the 9 months pre-op, I started to associate food with sustenance and not something that made me happy. Baking makes me happy but not the way a half of pizza use to.

I recently been testing some recipes for the holidays since I plan on baking some goodies as presents. I posted a few pictures to my face book and I had a few people telling me I should be eating pie and cupcakes.

Now I want to be very clear, I didn't post pictures of me eating them just the end product and I haven't had any of baked goods in over 2 months. It really annoyed me because I know what I can and can not be eating. Its frustrating when people who haven't gone through the process or have never had any problem with their weight seem to always have an opinion on how I can be successful.

I feel like everyone is watching what I eat.... Anyone else feel this way?

One of the many reasons that I'm keeping my journey SECRET....bless you're heart. .you bake on gal!

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I hate to sound like a cranky old lady, but I miss the days when people undestood that comments about people's appearance and eating habits are rude and out of line. Just tune them out.

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I have had a really supportive response from my friends and family which I'm so thankful for. I just didn't expect everyone to be giving me their uneducated opinion. It's always funny when someone is like "oh, I know someone who wasn't really successful with the bypass" or "I know someone who gained weight after the bypass". I just look at them and I'm like, "I got the gastric sleeve" It's more annoying than upsetting. I know everyone wants to feel like they're being helpful but it comes off rude sometimes.

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I noticed my mother has asked me "are you allowed to eat that?" and included a "look" with it as well. I just say, "I dont know, but I want to see if I can handle it".

A co-worker of mine who had gastric bypass 8 years ago was trying to tell me what to do as far as walking. She said I HAVE TO get up and walk every 2 hours; that's what she was told, so I should do that too since I work 10 hours. Umm, no lady, I don't HAVE TO do that.

I don't like when people try to tell me anything about my surgery or how/what I should be eating, especially when they've got a snickers bar in their hand.

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Let me introduce you to the concept of not giving a darn and the power of telling people not to police your food. I'm truly serious. People who know me wouldn't dare to step to me like that. Those that don't are politely told I am grown and don't need to be told what I can and cannot eat.

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I bake. I take a bite or two, save some fory husband and give the rest away. Bake whAtever you want.

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There is an incredible amount of ignorance out there about this surgery and the entire process. I just try to ignore it. It's my business, I know what's best for me.

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    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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