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I am mad at myself..



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Maybe he has a friend like him for you!!!

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That's a scary thought! All I need is another self absorbed intellectual with so much baggage he'd have to pay the overcharge at the airport....

Maybe he has a friend like him for you!!!

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LOL, what a jerk. Seriously - he's just not into you? I don't think so. One of two things - he's so self absorbed he can't get over himself, or he is into you but doesn't know what to do with it because maybe he's not physically able. Either way, you win - you can move on. But I still think it was a good idea to see it to the end, otherwise you might have always wondered. He did seem like a good prospect. Now you know.

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Sheez ....

Some people get their kicks in the strangest ways.

Onward and upward, Cowgirl.

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what a jerk he sounds like now! it is so friggin hard to find a suitably aged man (i'm 56) who is emotionally available and physically attractive and financially secure and not an axe murderer.

i've been divorced for 10 yrs now, and dating has been like a second job since then, seriously. i found that the more i did it, the better i became at weeding out the ones that didn't work for me... i used to tease first dates about my "patented process".

i've had several relationships since my divorce, all of them good but none of them great. eventually there would come a time when i realized that and i had to move on. i mean, even my ex-husband was "right" for me at one time... i've changed since i first got married, and i continue to do so, and therefore so do the qualifications for the right partner.

luckily for me, i found him. he's adorable, intelligent, sexy and treats me like a goddess, but hasn't got a penny. i got over that and we have been living together happily ever after for the last year and a half. i feel incredibly lucky!

i'm glad i didn't give up dating because i never would have found him. i tell myself that all the others between him and my ex husband were who i needed at the time, and that i wouldn't have been ready for him before i found him. what i mean is, the most important thing to look for in a relationship is that it satisfies you, whatever it is that you want, be it sex, affection, a travel companion, someone to hike with... and doesn't DISsatisfy you in a way that you choose not to accept.

you did good. :) on to the next fool! they're all fools until you find the right one.

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Thank you Jessi - I am getting the idea that this is a very common issue in our age range. I have a friend who is a bombshell, tall, blonde, mid 40s and she was about ready to give up too.... It is like they are attracted to your looks but then you start to realize the emotional issues people have, how they often really have issues with women, aren't over their ex, are very negative... whatever the case may be. I am sure men have the same issues because I guess there is a reason we find ourselves single at this stage of life.

I probably need to get over some of my criteria - i am simply not attracted to 95% of the men within 5-7 years of my age, but I don't want a young boyfriend playmate. I want someone who at least for awhile, is in a good relationship with me but he should be fit enough to keep up with me. I don't think that is asking alot, it isn't like I am a super athlete but I can do a 9-10 mile hike up and down a mountain and not alot of 50-60 year olds seem to be at that level.

I get hit on alot... but so wildly inappropriate sometimes (Saturday night, it was a guy in his 20s!) but mostly so incredibly unattractive to me if they are near my age - usually way older actually (that also happened Saturday night). I need to get over that, but i can't help that i am just not drawn to someone who looks like santa claus (not fit, older looking, not youthful in attitude). I am being a brat i guess, but I would rather be solo than with someone who doesn't interest me. I don't think it is fair to even date guys that just don't attract me.

Anyway, I am fine. I go dancing with a social group every week. I have a plan a plan to take actual dance lessons so I can do couples dancing more confidently. I am thinking about joining some organizations (I am not a big joiner really but my horse community is all women so i need to find groups with a better mix) of outdoorsy people because that is where I will find fit men my age. I do find them on the dating websites, and attract them okay, but I am not doing so well with picking the emotionally available ones... so far... 2 out of 2 have turned out to really be cut off from the possibilities of even becoming friends, in spite of their stated intentions. (BTW, it might be me - I get it - but they tell me they LIKE me and enjoy being with me so it is hard to know.) I think I just haven't found the right man for this stage of my life.

Okay, I have vented enough. :) Carry on!

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. summerseeker

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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