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Do not feel bad about it. It was the best thing I have ever done!! Do this for yourself. Please! Do not feel guilty, ashamed or anything. Be proud that you have the courage and ability to do this for yourself.

Thank you, I needed to hear that.

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I get what you are saying but we have a bariatric rider in the policy that requires 40% out of pocket. Nothing to be done about it I am afraid. Thanks

Butterbeanfly- I think this is an investment in yourself and you are worth it!! This initial investment is priceless and will pay for itself many times over throughout your life!!! As women and mothers it is hard to put our needs above those of our family members, but we need to take care of ourselves. You are not alone.

I understand that you have to pay 40% out of pocket per your policy, but different hospitals have different rates negotiated with different insurers and also negotiate different rates with different patients. I have to pay 30% up to my out of pocket max of $8000. I have 3 hospitals in my state that my plan contracts with. Each of those 3 hospitals had a different cost. 2 hospitals were going to cost me the full $8000 out of pocket. The third hospital was only going to cost me $4500 out of pocket for the same procedure. It is absolutely worth calling around and seeing what the different hospitals cost in your area. I was fortunately found to be covered under a secondary insurance which will significantly reduce my out of pocket cost and I was able to go to the hospital closest to my home (even though it is still 3+ hours away).

Your payment is a percentage which can change significantly based upon the total procedure cost negotiated between each hospital and each insurer. It may cost you significantly less at another hospital.

Please don't be offended for me stepping in to this conversation. I know how important this surgery is to each of us and also am very frugal.

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I looked at it this way. The surgery probably added 10 years to my life. Great investment even at x10000000 the price.

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I get what you are saying but we have a bariatric rider in the policy that requires 40% out of pocket. Nothing to be done about it I am afraid. Thanks

Butterbeanfly- I think this is an investment in yourself and you are worth it!! This initial investment is priceless and will pay for itself many times over throughout your life!!! As women and mothers it is hard to put our needs above those of our family members, but we need to take care of ourselves. You are not alone.

I understand that you have to pay 40% out of pocket per your policy, but different hospitals have different rates negotiated with different insurers and also negotiate different rates with different patients. I have to pay 30% up to my out of pocket max of $8000. I have 3 hospitals in my state that my plan contracts with. Each of those 3 hospitals had a different cost. 2 hospitals were going to cost me the full $8000 out of pocket. The third hospital was only going to cost me $4500 out of pocket for the same procedure. It is absolutely worth calling around and seeing what the different hospitals cost in your area. I was fortunately found to be covered under a secondary insurance which will significantly reduce my out of pocket cost and I was able to go to the hospital closest to my home (even though it is still 3+ hours away).

Your payment is a percentage which can change significantly based upon the total procedure cost negotiated between each hospital and each insurer. It may cost you significantly less at another hospital.

Please don't be offended for me stepping in to this conversation. I know how important this surgery is to each of us and also am very frugal.

Thanks, honestly I am a little worn down from the whole process thus far. I have already had to switch hospitals once and fortunately the new doctor took all my pre-cert from other place. The other two wanted me to start from square one again. I have been at this since April. I really need to finish it this year since I have met deductible,es and invested so much time off work. The closest place is 2 hours away, fortunately they also have Saturday meetings which is a plus. I know it's expensive but I don't want to start over again and I did not care for one of the two remaining choices. My husband says it is what it is.

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I understand completely. (((hugs))) I don't know how you have started over and still kept such a positive outlook. Good luck on your surgery and I hope everything goes smooth from this point. I LOVE the fact you found someone who does weekend meetings. I haven't been so lucky here. I am trying to time my appointments with the times of the monthly support meetings. You will be on the loser's bench before you know it and this struggle will be a faint memory one day!

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I understand completely. (((hugs))) I don't know how you have started over and still kept such a positive outlook. Good luck on your surgery and I hope everything goes smooth from this point. I LOVE the fact you found someone who does weekend meetings. I haven't been so lucky here. I am trying to time my appointments with the times of the monthly support meetings. You will be on the loser's bench before you know it and this struggle will be a faint memory one day!

According to my psychological profile test it's in my nature to take a licking and keep on ticking, lol. Though truthfully when I found our I had to start again I cried for a few hours until my husband pointed out it was just another hoop and basically a change of venue. He is a really great guy. I need to learn to accept I am worth this. I have thought a lot about what everyone has been so kind to offer and I feel no less guilty when I have to tell my kids I can't do something because I am physically unable. I am afraid to fly on business trips with my husband because of fat plane shame and I want to do so much! I want to ride roller coasters and run agility with my dogs and go to school functions where I just blend in. Thanks for helping, fingers crossed insurance comes through soon. :)

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Yay!! Congratulations!!

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Excellent news! You ARE worth it. Accept the blessing that you can afford and it go with gusto. :-)

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Excellent news! You ARE worth it. Accept the blessing that you can afford and it go with gusto. :-)

Thank you! I am sure when I get going I will believe I am :).

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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