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Have been banded for just over 3 months and have lost about 35 pounds. I am happy with my progress so far and I understand that my weight loss will be slow. I'm annoyed because my mom keeps telling people I have lost 45-50 pounds because she feels I should be losing weight faster. I keep reminding her that slow weight loss is long term healthy weight loss and I won't be skinny overnight. It's also annoying because when I tell people how much weight I have really lost it just doesn't seem as impressive. Sorry for the rant but it is just annoying!

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Wow 35 pounds in 3 months is fantastic. Try to ignore your mothers comments. You are right that taking the weight off slower is more lasting. We with WLS have to develop a thick skin. Family members can hurt us the worst because they know where we are vulnerable. You are doing great so just keep up the good work. 35 pounds is inspiring to me!!

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You are doing really well! My first response was omg! You must be embarrassed for your mom? It's time to have a heart to heart and let her know how hurtful this is. Bottom line is it's no one business unless YOU decide to share it! Big hugs! I'm so sorry...

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@@clownbaby you are doing AWESOME! Don't let your Mom or anyone else discourage you! You have all the right answers. You didn't gain it over night and it won't go away overnight. I won't just vanish in the night, WLS doesn't come with a fairy godmother who can wave her wand and turn us into Victoria Secrets models strutting the runway of NYC in nothing but our wings and bra's. (actually sounds like a bit of nightmare to me and I'm not shy!)

Being banded your 100% right you are going to lose the weight slowly, you have to do the work right up front from day one with the band. With many of the other surgeries the weight comes off from day due to the mal-absorptive factors in the surgery and then it's really hard for the person to maintain and/or keep losing after a few months when the body adapts to the new regime.

Your body type and your genetics as well as overall health are going to play a big part in how you lose as well. These bodies we have are pretty amazing at overcoming and adapting to what we throw at them and into them! Keep doing what your doing cause it's working great.

Have your Mom attend a support group with you so she can get more education and understanding about what your going through and be an even better support for you. I'm sure you know your Mom means well, we all do...we just don't always approach our children in the best way :)

I have 5 boys...and it's a bit of a river dance to talk to them all on their level and not get my head bitten off!

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Thank you guys so much for the kind words. I know she is just excited about my weight loss and she does mean well but she still doesn't understand where I'm coming from. Thank you for your input and advice, I feel much better and less annoyed!

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Like you, I was very open to tell everyone I did the surgery and I felt I had to prove to them that I had lost the weight until I realized that it is not their business how much you loose in how long, so I've started telling everyone who asked me how much I had lost "a lot, I feel so healthy, so active and So happy" they never new I didn't answer their question, I suggest you to try that with your mother.

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I'm a mom with grown kids myself. When I was growing up my mother was very much like yours always exaggerating the facts. If I got a B+ in grade school to her it was like an A- lol.

Your Mom is actually proud of you for losing weight but she 's going about it the wrong way.

When I would have a heart to heart with my mom she would get really upset because she 'd say she was proud of me.

Well, I no longer have Mom and she died of Alzheimer's disease and I'd give anything now just to hear her exaggerations again so forgive Mom and just keep doing what you 're doing because 35 lbs is nothing to sneeze at. Keep up the good work!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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