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Yesterday I watched some of the YouTube videos...
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...and for whatever reason, I went a little nuts afterwards. I don't know if it all just seems more real when you're watching a person tell their story compared to just reading it, or if I was just due for a little crazy time
.
Every now and then something makes me think about what I am planning on having done to my body, and I freak a little. I am standing with my decision to have the surgery. I know why I need the surgery. I've been trying to lose weight unsuccessfully for 25 yrs (I'm 56), and I'm chock filled with comorbidities, plus I just can't move. The only fun I ever have now has to be either sitting (backgammon, movies, etc) or laying down (not gonna give examples here lol). I want my full life back.
But man, I never imagined myself here. I always thought eventually I'd be able to get it off myself... when I got married, when I got pregnant, when I got the new job, when I got divorced, when I turned 30 40 50...
Anyway, I freaked and ate more than was on my plan, although I was able to stop it sooner than usual, and ended up going to bed depressed in the middle of a beautiful Sunday afternoon.
All better now! And still looking forward to an early Fall surgery date. Thanks for listening!