Band reactivated!

[parisshel 1,892]

All hail its power!

Three months after having my band unfilled, this morning was the day! It could not get here fast enough. All my old behaviors around food were circling the wagon, just waiting for my willpower to break. Three months, while not long in the scheme of things, felt so very long for me. But what a reminder of how powerful the band is--three months without any restriction and my mindset was right back to that of a non-surgical weight loss patient: always thinking about food, counting hours between meals, ability to eat anything in any amount and trying desperately not too...and sometimes failing and feeling horrible at being so weak-willed.

The radiologist told me before he filled me that there was no way I'd go back to my sweet spot---6 cc in a 10cc band--in one fill, as three months with an unfilled band means my stomach organ had a chance to relax and expand and I'd be too tight if he filled me back to my prior level. But when he got in there, and filled to 5 cc, I didn't have enough restriction when I drank the barium so he did top me up to 6 cc. This means that I didn't do too badly during my hiatus; had I eaten whatever I had wanted to eat, I surely would have stretched out my stomach to pre-band size. So hooray for the little self-restraint I did show! (I gained 5 pounds over the three months, but that easily could've been much, much more.)

I cannot overempathize how WONDERFUL it feels to have restriction again. My appetite was instantly turned off! As I walked back home from the radiologist's office, all the gorgeous displays in the bakeries didn't call to me. (Unfilled, I had to avert my eyes...this stuff is so very triggering to me.)

In a very perverse way, I have to say that this three-month period was a gift. It really drove home how powerful my band is. I will never be someone who will say "I did this all myself, with my good choices and discipline." Being unfilled turned me right back into a [failing] dieter. I am SO grateful that I made the decision to get a lapband, and not keep trying to find weight loss success on my own. It's crazy evident that making those good choices in foods/portions is only possible because the band turns way way down the part of my brain that drives me to eat compulsively. I truly am a different eater when banded, through the power of this little piece of plastic,

So happy to be back in the game. It is so very freeing to go through the day without fighting my cravings.

Sipping a coffee---very slowly and carefully, because I'm so tight that it backs up into my throat--and looking forward to the next drop in weight. Here we go!

[catfish87 3,471]

Congrats!!! Happy days ahead

[Lady VS 1,147]

That is great that you could maintain yourself for three months of being unfilled and only 5 pounds. Simply incredible. Continued success.

[Bandista 7,466]

Yippee! So happy for you -- I know that was a long three months. Love it that you have this perspective on it, though, the importance of the band vs. good habits, how much we need this device to continue to achieve success. Get ready to drop those five and five more, five more -- you are doing beautifully!

[2muchfun 8,928]

Couldn't help my inner Trekie voice:

Month 1:

Kirk: Scottie, shields up now!!

Scottie: (in my best Scottish accent) But Captain, the shields are weak and only at 50% power

Month 2:

Kirk: Scottie, Scottie...More shields, decks 3, 4 and 5 are heavily damaged!

Scottie: Captain, I'm doin all I can. The shields seem to be wavering but still holding captain!

Month 3:

Kirk: Gawddamitt Scottie, where are those shields? Eminent doom on screen now!!

Scottie: Captain, give me just one more minute? Shields only at 10% power. The Polyvinyl filled dome is being re-inflated as I speak.

Today:

Kirk: Scottie, no more surprises or you'll be sent to planet I'msofat in the blobular galaxy, got it?

Scottie, Aye captain, I think we've got it all under control now.

What's not so funny is that Scottie did enter the planet I'msofat and you can choose the disease that finally killed him, Parkinsons, Alzheimers, diabetes mellitus, pulmonary fibrosis or obesity(which one came first?) Still a fine man and WW2 veteran to be admired. Sorry for the rant/ramble.