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Just not interested!

Unhappysleever

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Unhappysleever    39

Unhappysleever
Posted (edited)

Hi,

Does anyone feel the same way about this journey. I did this for me thinking it was the right thing before I got bigger and older but now 4 months out I am just not interested. Sure I have had ongoing complications but how do you move on from this. I just dread every day - and that includes not being able to eat and drink whatever I want!!!

Feels like it will never get easier...

Edited by Unhappysleever
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DonRodolfo    1,416

DonRodolfo
Posted

Hi,

Does anyone feel the same way about this journey. I did this for me thinking it was the right thing before I got bigger and older but now 4 months out I am just not interested. Sure I have had ongoing complications but how do you move on from this. I just dread every day - and that includes not being able to eat and drink whatever I want!!!

Feels like it will never get easier...

I have to wonder if you're not suffering from depression which is actually common in our situation. May I suggest you see someone.

Coming from a person that would frequently start their day with 3500 calories worth of Breakfast, I'm here to tell you the only regret I have is that I wasted 10+ years of my life as a sedentary slug. I eat whatever I want, but I make smarter choices about it. I have more energy than I did at 40 years old and I ran 6.4 miles yesterday (without the need to be in the hospital today :D ) and I am training for my first half-marathon. A year ago I would have told you that you were on crack if you told me I'd be doing this today.

Yeah, you've given up a few things but you have gained SO MUCH more and you need to take advantage of it to get the full benefit.

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lkleigh    38

lkleigh
Posted

I am 3 months out. I feel the same way. Some days I feel ok, but on days that I have a lot of restriction I can get very depressed. It is def not easy!

I'm right there with you. I've been feeling very frustrated the last couple of days especially. Especially with the Water. I've never enjoyed drinking fluids of any kind. Nothing to be done now but trudge forward, since we can't turn back time.

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Unhappysleever    39

Unhappysleever
Posted (edited)

I find it difficult to move forward. I wake up every day feeling ordinary, I am not my happy self. I was prepared for the food thing but thought I could have what I want but just in smaller doses and some days even eating is just too difficult. I so bad just want to get back to 'normal' that I feel it will never happen - anyone feel the same??? I would have thought by 4 mths things have turned around but maybe I am just one of the unlucky ones thats going to take longer to adjust :( p.s and the crying OmG, when does that stop!!!

Edited by Unhappysleever
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lkleigh    38

lkleigh
Posted

I find it difficult to move forward. I wake up every day feeling ordinary, I am not my happy self. I was prepared for the food thing but thought I could have what I want but just in smaller doses and some days even eating is just too difficult. I so bad just want to get back to 'normal' that I feel it will never happen - anyone feel the same??? I would have thought by 4 mths things have turned around but maybe I am just one of the unlucky ones thats going to take longer to adjust :( p.s and the crying OmG, when does that stop!!!

:-(. Maybe you should talk to your doctor about anti depressants. I also see a therapist and it helps. I used to be skeptical about therapy. I thought, "how can talking about stuff that's already happened be helpful?!" But it really is.

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greensleeve    457

greensleeve
Posted

I find it difficult to move forward. I wake up every day feeling ordinary, I am not my happy self. I was prepared for the food thing but thought I could have what I want but just in smaller doses and some days even eating is just too difficult. I so bad just want to get back to 'normal' that I feel it will never happen - anyone feel the same??? I would have thought by 4 mths things have turned around but maybe I am just one of the unlucky ones thats going to take longer to adjust :( p.s and the crying OmG, when does that stop!!!

What do you mean eating is too difficult?

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Unhappysleever    39

Unhappysleever
Posted (edited)

Difficulty in you just can't grab something and eat it - you have to make sure it's not to much, Protein based, eat healthy - always have to think what goes into your mouth, for me I am already tired of the constant thought process

I just want to feel normal and eat normal...

Edited by Unhappysleever

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LivingFree!    478

LivingFree!
Posted

So sorry to hear that you are feeling so discouraged about your decision to have the sleeve. It is not uncommon for some people to have some serious issues with depression after surgery. And it sounds like you need some help to find your way to your "new normal" that will be your new lifestyle for the rest of your life. You might even need to be prescribed an anti-depressant for awhile. Please consider talking to a professional so you can get yourself on a more positive outlook.

Like it or not, you did make the CHOICE to have 80% of your stomach permanently removed, but whether or not you believe this right now, you DO have the courage and the strength to develop those new habits and the healthy lifestyle that will enable you to live that healthy and happy life. There is nothing to be ashamed of for feeling the depression that you do right now--depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain, not a weakness of character.

Yes, this IS HARD!!! Did someone tell you it was all going to be EASY PEEZY??? Nothing that is worthwhile in life comes without some sacrifice. I think many, many other members on Bariatric Pal will agree with me, especially those who are more than one year post surgery--every challenge, both big or small--was so worth it to achieve the new lives they are enjoying today. I am 3 years out and I cannot begin to tell you how much my life has changed. But it didn't just "happen."

You have no time to waste--you have a lot of work to do in developing your new eating habits and healty lifestyle. But first you have to get your mind healthy and happy again. Please be good to yourself, and soon you'll be making the work of learning the bariatric lifestyle a fun adventure instead of the drudgery you're feeling about it now. Yes, I said FUN--it can be FUN!!!

Chin up! No standing still! Move forward!

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Unhappysleever    39

Unhappysleever
Posted

Lilprincess, thank you so much for your encouraging words, they made me CRY... I just feel at the moment this new life is such a chore instead of it being how I thought, wonderful. I know I need to move forward and some days I really do, then I have a set back and the regret comes flowing in. I will try my best to make this more FUN, just won't promise....

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Bigmommatojacob    54

Bigmommatojacob
Posted

Hi, Does anyone feel the same way about this journey. I did this for me thinking it was the right thing before I got bigger and older but now 4 months out I am just not interested. Sure I have had ongoing complications but how do you move on from this. I just dread every day - and that includes not being able to eat and drink whatever I want!!! Feels like it will never get easier...

my psych told me we get the majority of our an bodies chemicals for happiness from our stomach. She told me we may have to tweak my medicines after the surgery for that. I also have days where I see everyone just choking down and I can not and it really irritates me. Then I remember why I did this. I am unhealthy and cannot control my eating habits. I want to live. Just remember it will get better. Our tummies are new and healing.

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apex4me    5

apex4me
Posted

Lilprincess, thank you so much for your encouraging words, they made me CRY... I just feel at the moment this new life is such a chore instead of it being how I thought, wonderful. I know I need to move forward and some days I really do, then I have a set back and the regret comes flowing in. I will try my best to make this more FUN, just won't promise....

Unhappysleever, I am scheduled for my surgery on June 4 and everything u are saying has been eating away at me everyday as my surgery date creeps up. It scares the hell out of me that I will not be able to control my head hunger and that depression will kick in..Then I take an honest look at myself and realize that I have to do something other than kidding myself that I can lose the weight on my own without major changes in my life....I think this new uncomfortable lifestyle we are facing is difficult because we haven't mastered the routine. This surgery took u out of your comfort zone. It's totally natural to have regrets but it will get easier. Have u set any goals that u can focus on to get u through this?

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Unhappysleever    39

Unhappysleever
Posted

Apex4me, i really do think it has taken me out of my comfort zone and i just dont like it. I haven't set my self any goals cause at the moment my true only goal is to wake up in the morning and not feel sick all the time. I just think this is going to take me 6-12 montths to feel good, i hate feeling ill. The only thing i cant complain about is i now weigh 66lbs less but would be okay if i didnt lose another pound.

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yeya89    1

yeya89
Posted

I am 2 1/2 weeks post op and am feeling the regret of having this surgery. I cry too much and always feel hungry I wish it gets better

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LipstickLady    25,682

LipstickLady
Posted

Difficulty in you just can't grab something and eat it - you have to make sure it's not to much, Protein based, eat healthy - always have to think what goes into your mouth, for me I am already tired of the constant thought process

I just want to feel normal and eat normal...

Sure you can! cheese sticks, 100 cal packs of almonds, beef Jerky, thin sliced deli meat, all beef lower fat hot dogs, Protein Bars, grab and go hummus cups with pretzel thins, yogurt...

You'll get to the point where it's second nature and it's OH SO worth it. I can run, I can jump, I can do more with my kids than ever before. I can shop in any store, I can buy any outfit off the rack, I look cute in clothes now and I don't mind getting my picture taken. (What the what!?!?!)

You need to find your happiness in something other than food. Zumba? Walking a dog? Knitting? Reading a great book? A new set of friends at a meet-up group? food is fuel and a necessity for your body, but not a necessity for your happiness. Go find something you love to replace eating. You will be SO glad you did.

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Go To Topic Listing POST-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A

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    • Doughgurl

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      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

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        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Doughgurl

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    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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