Girls: After you lost weight do strangers give you more attention?

[Sunta 4]

Hi!

Recently, since I've lost 85 pounds, I've noticed that men have been giving me alot more attention.

For example I was dressed up the other day for a night out, and I pulled in to get gas. You would have thought Beyonce pulled up the way the guys were acting. I got out of the car and the one guy was like "Helllloooooo!" and then he said "My, my, MY don't you look niiiiice today!!!"

I was like "Uh thanks. I'm going out tonight."

Then yesterday, two guys in a truck were actually honking and WAVING at me!

I'm only halfway to goal so I can't imagine what it's going to be like when I get there!

Is this what thin women deal with all day long, every day?

I don't know if I should be flattered or insulted.

[musicalmomma 1]

It's probably a combination of being slimmer AND the confidence you exude from knowing you look and feel great!

Feels good tho doesn't it?

[ReneBean 3]

Yep - I think it's more about attitude than attributes.

I am nowhere close to goal - but I walk with a spring in my step and look people in the eye - so yeah, they pay more attention.

[lisah25 3]

Yeah, I've noticed that too. And even happily married, I like it!

[Wheetsin 714]

Yes, but it irritates me. I understand it, but it is still irritating.

And it was the exact same way before I gained the weight, only I didn't process it as such because it had always been that way. It took being fat and very, very rarely getting any attention before I realized that getting the attention wasn't just "how it was".

[Alexandra 55]

I'll be the odd one out and say no, I don't get more attention now than before. I get different attention, yes, but not only from men. People in general are much more willing to meet my gaze, and are less likely to pretend I don't exist. That was a surprising change and one I very much appreciate.

But attention from random men has always been of the unpleasant variety, when it comes, and men who are going to ogle strange women don't--in my experience--have very discriminating tastes. I've always gotten a certain amount of that no matter what I look like. And I hate it. Maybe it's me, but I don't feel like my very presence on the street is an invitation to flirt. I don't like being objectified, and I'm actually quite relieved that there hasn't been a marked increase in that sort of activity since I lost weight.

[Jachut 487]

Yes and I hate it. I cant go for a run without getting honked at, hooted at, and having lewd remarks thrown out of windows. It just proves that a lot of men are bloody idiots.

OK, so I have boobs. So does every other woman.

Why cant I just be left alone to exercise?. I dont go out dressed in hardly anything to gain attention when I run.

I also find it a bit intimidating and threatening given that I'm on my own. I hate standing at traffic lights and knowing I'm being looked at in that way.

[Alexandra 55]

It just proves that a lot of men are bloody idiots.

Hear hear!! :nod: :nod: :nod:

[396power 2]

I used to be one of those idiots. And when I got married I relized somthing changed. mainly cause I felt I was cheating on my wife by doing this so I stoped, that was 10 yrs ago. I'm still tempted to look But for the most part I have taught myself to look the other way.

[edieparks 2]

Yes I notice people being friendlier in general. I kind of resent it. I feel like they wouldn't give me the time of day before. I remember trying to just make small talk at the doctors office for example and getting ignored. They would look me straight in the eye and it would be why would I want to talk to a fat cow like you? I am a very freindly person and as I put on weight I got that cold stare more and more. It really hurt my feeling.

Well lets just face it the world likes normal weight people.

edie

[lianna 3]

I notice a huge difference in the amount of attention from men. The stockers at the grocery store never fail to ask if they can help me find something, doors are held open, many more "good mornings" and "hellos", etc... In the post office this week a man offered to let me go in line in front of him. (i didnt! i just said i dont mind the wait). I am not offended by THAT kind of attention. I think they are just responding to the happiness and confidence that finally shines through again, and hopefully just trying to be gentlemanly or something. Whistles when I am taking my walks and such.....that is a little offensive, but in a way an offhand compliment....because I certainly didnt get them when I started walking at 200+ lbs.

[BJean 16]

edie: I completely agree. I am still surprised when people talk to me in a store now. They never did it when I was so heavy. In fact, like Alexandra said, they now look at my face instead of my fat body. I still have a lot of weight to lose, but I guess I look more normal now and don't disgust people like I did before. Having someone ignore you when you speak is a really awful feeling. Or when someone talks to the other people in a room and excludes you really stinks too. I notice now that even kids tend to be dismissive of overweight people.

[mannamay 0]

What I don't like when you are heavy is when you go for a job interview and the interviewer can't help but stare at you ( not in a good way ). I went for a job interview the other day and I did not get it, but a slender girl did. What a suck out!

[Boo Boo Kitty 3]

Yes, but it irritates me. I understand it, but it is still irritating.

And it was the exact same way before I gained the weight, only I didn't process it as such because it had always been that way. It took being fat and very, very rarely getting any attention before I realized that getting the attention wasn't just "how it was".

Amen, I feel the SAME way Wheestin! I am still the same me as I was before. But NOW no doors are shut in my face, everyone smiles at me, no one makes me wonder what is wrong with me. Although it is nice to be treated like a human why did I have to loose weight to be human????

[ladybug390 0]

at this point (still fat) if a guy talks to me when im out at a bar or somewhere with my friends im always very controlled to not look flattered because im convinced that his friends are somewhere within eyeshot laughing. maybe im paranoid but i wonder if that attitude will ever go away...always first assuming that any attention i get is some kind of joke. i bet it will take a long long time to let my guard down.