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Hi: Someone told me that bandsters are a family because we all are so alike but yet so different. That we have a closeness that outsiders can't understand, no do I think they want to. We have to tell the ones living with us, but anyone else.......no way. You all know the old adage "if you want to keep a secret, don't tell anyone". I did and it hurt big time. If I had a SIL like yours, I too would be shaking with anger. Just don't head for the frig. Doddie

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It's all cool. She knows that she was in the wrong but she is type of person that will not learn from this. I will not ge able to change her so what ever. She is out of the circle for good. She is the one that will be missing out.

I cant be bothered to waste energy and time thinking about it.

Andrew

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Good for you. I wish I could be like you. I keep thinking I have moved on, but every once in awhile, I get a tinge of regret. Regret my sister reacted so mean but then I shrug and try to move forward again. I only had two days of grazing but realized that I am only hurting myself. So..........went to a support meeting of WLS patients and had a good time. I am amazed at how some members of a family try to control the one with a weight problem. Everyone had something to say about that. Doddie

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Hi :heh:

I am having a bit of a problem as to who to tell. So far I have only told my husband and mom. I am not to sure how much I should tell my kids (ages 15,17,19). I sometimes think I will say nothing and then other times I want to tell them. Any thoughts?

Do you bandsters think I will be able to hide it from them, or will they notice my soreness?:girl_hug: :help:

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Chester-girl. You may have read my post where I told my sister and the extreme reaction I got. The only advice I can give you is "if they ask be up front and tell them". If they don't ask, carry on as if life is normal. If people see you are loosing weight they will just think you are on another diet which you are. Why do they have to know you have the wonderful band as a tool. Doddie

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Chester-girl - I agree with Doddie. If they ask, then decide at that point what and how much you want to tell them.

I'm not sure who I'll tell after the fact or what people will notice. I guess I'll have to eventually face it at some point. I've been a chronic dieter all my life so I don't think my family will be surprised when I start losing weight but it might be an issue if I PB in front of any of them or quickly run off to the bathroom during a meal. I'll just face it when I need to. Good luck!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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