female only Help Me Through This Break Up

[Oregondaisy 2,020]

Geez, it doesn't get any easier. I am 61 years old and I have been through a few break ups before.

My bf and I lived together for 2 1/2 years. We broke up 3 weeks ago. He has such a problem with money I just could not deal with it anymore.

I've made a list of all of his annoying habits and reasons why I broke up with him. I have to look at it frequenly. But I'm still crying every time I think about him. I wish this would get easier. I know in my heart that I did the right thing by breaking up with him, but I still miss him so much.

[Brighteyes 237]

Give yourself some time to grieve the end of the relationship. Take maybe 5 mins everyday to feel sorry for yourself, cry, scream, whatever you need to do. Then stop it for the rest of the day.

[gamergirl 4,609]

Oh OD I'm so sorry to hear that. It's tough. I know for me the only things that got me through breakup were to keep my brain occupied. I would read difficult books or watch movies or do things that didn't allow my brain to wander and let me dwell on my sadness. It's a huge effort. I'd start reading and before I knew it, I'd be back to thinking about the other person. And is have to bring myself back on task.

That constant distraction and active thought suppression--refusing to allow yourself to dwell on it, changing the subject, as it were, when the negative thoughts come in, is how I coped. I've taught the same things to my older son and it's worked for him as well. Those two things plus knowing that this wasn't your only chance for a successful relationship, were the only things they helped me.

It still sucks though. ((Hugs))

[No game 14,437]

Doing the right thing does not always equal easy, just the opposite as a matter of fact. You decided to get off the path of least resistance... to make a change. I applaud you for that. Recognizing that things weren't working for you, and making an uncomfortable move to get to a place of peace and happiness. Even though it may not feel that way right now.

Lean on us, cry when you need to, and most importantly, breath....

[ReDbEaN 654]

I'm so sorry But I think you know it was the right choice...sucks that the right choice isn't the easiest...hugs to you

[Oregondaisy 2,020]

I just wish I could get to the place that when I think of his online dating profile, I don't freak out at the thought that he's going to find someone else. He won't be alone long.

[gamergirl 4,609]

I just wish I could get to the place that when I think of his online dating profile, I don't freak out at the thought that he's going to find someone else. He won't be alone long.

Being part of a couple and being happy are not the same thing though. And you don't know what lies ahead for you either. Maybe the best is yet to be and it's the next one that will be the perfect one for you as well.

((Hugs))

[Beach Lover 1,084]

Hang in there! You have lost a lot of weight and with that comes confidence and possibilities! Maybe you will be the one off the market quickly. Keep yourself busy and try to get out and socialize. Maybe take some classes of interest that you would like to have done but put off. Join your friends for an evening out! Healing will take some time but you can do it! Hugs!!

[M2G 1,836]

Hugs OD! I know this is a rough time, and I like that you made a list. Don't worry if he gets "snapped" up quickly by other women, because unless he is going to change the things that are on that list, unfortunately whoever "gets" him gets all the problems and issues as well.

Take this time to focus on YOU, what YOU want, and who YOU are. I think that will take some of the pressure off from finding someone else to take his place. Remember it's not a race to find someone new...take some time to enjoy not having the stress of being "in a relationship" right now. Hugs my dear friend!

[Oregondaisy 2,020]

Yeah, there is a forum on POF where people talk about all sorts of subjects,

They have a broken hearted forum. I posted in there, and someone gave me a really helpful website about getting over breakups. Plus I ordered some moving on books from Amazon.< /p>

[southernsoul 773]

Breakups are rough no matter how old we are. Hang in there & treat yourself extra well right now. Go do something special just for you, or treat yourself to something new. You will get through it in time. ((hugs))

[lsereno 2,525]

It's been a long time since I broke up, but your message reminded me that I always missed them and dreaded change, even though I knew it was for the best. Find something fun to fill the hole he left in your life. lunch with friends, a fall hike, a new set of sheets. Whatever. I'm thinking of you.

Lynda

[Oregondaisy 2,020]

Someone actually gave me a very helpful website on breakups. They even have a Facebook page. It's been a nice distraction.

Thanks everyone. I feel so much better today. It's been a month now that we've spoken and every day should get easier.

[Madam Reverie 2,958]

Care to share the breakup website page? x

[Oregondaisy 2,020]

The name of the website is baggagereclaim.com

There is a Facebook group too that I can get reinforcement affirmations on my face book every day.