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I will regret this for the rest of my life



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I'm 3 months out and 51 pds down. I wasted 20 years of my life being afraid to accept the miracles of modern medicine. After your surgery you will know that this is not the easy way out. The more people who are not afraid to tell the truth about having had the surgery, the sooner this stigma will be lifted. Could I have lost weight on my own? Sure, done it hundreds of times. Did I keep it off? Nope. But this little tool; this incredible little miracle of modern science has given me an awareness of food as fuel and body as biology and I will not take this for granted. I regret the choices that got me here but not the choice to commit to a sustainable way out. I hope the choice you make brings you the results you desire.

Well said!!!!!!!!!

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Here's how I dealt with / internalized it. If I had a tumor I would have it cut out because to not have it cut out would mean death. Well. My stomach is my tumor. To not have it cut out meant death. This surgery is no more cheating then having a tumor cut out is cheating.

Also the surgery changes your body chemistry and metabolism. Which if I had to guess your metabolism is non existent like mine was. Just my $.02.

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Too busy losing weight to feel bad about losing weight. You lost it, you look good, and you feed better. The end greatly outweighs any means.

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I would NOT have a surgery I was certain I would regret, unequivocally. I considered WLS for 20 years before I had it. I was pretty sure I could lose weight if only I just tried harder. I'm a registered nurse, brought up in the world of science, and thought I knew everything there was to know about dieting and weight loss. I even knew the statistics about the dismal failure rates, but I thought I could/should overcome that brutal reality. So, while I dieted, lost some weight, gained some more, I went to several surgeons over the years, even went so far as to have the pre-op testing completed, and always backed out. At the time, RNY was the only option, and I just couldn't get on board with the malabsorption thing (and still can't). So, I thought I might regret it, and I never went through with it. Once I learned of VSG, I KNEW it would be the right decision for me, and I have not regretted it. Lots of people say their only regret is not doing it sooner, and while I do wish I had this option 20 years ago, I do not regret having a surgery I knew I would regret.

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Plus, you could do what I do and not tell anybody why you keep shrinking or why you can only eat small portions of food at a time.

Amen!

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It's normal to feel that way.

I lost 120lbs on my own, to gain them back. And now am turning to surgery bc I learned I can't do it alone. Plus, when I lost weight, I was too strict and exercised way too much. Sometimes I get embarrassed that I'm going through with surgery, but thankfully I have so much support to help me through. I know a lot that lost it on their own and gained it back.

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If you are having serious reservations about the surgery, then you shouldn't have it. This journey is difficult enough for folks who were motivated before going under the knife. I'm almost a year out, and I'm here to say that it is STILL difficult! This surgery will not solve all of your problems regarding overeating. So don't do it unless you feel you are truly ready to do it.

I remember when they wheeled me into the OR, helped me onto the operating table and were strapping me into place, I looked up at the nurse anesthetist and thought " I could say stop right now, and not go through with this." It took all I had to keep my mouth shut until they put me under! And I am glad that I kept my mouth shut, because I know this was the right decision for me, and I never could have been as successful without it. It is truly worth it and is the right decision for lots of people - only you can determine if it is the right decision for you.

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I would NOT have a surgery I was certain I would regret, unequivocally. I considered WLS for 20 years before I had it. I was pretty sure I could lose weight if only I just tried harder. I'm a registered nurse, brought up in the world of science, and thought I knew everything there was to know about dieting and weight loss. I even knew the statistics about the dismal failure rates, but I thought I could/should overcome that brutal reality. So, while I dieted, lost some weight, gained some more, I went to several surgeons over the years, even went so far as to have the pre-op testing completed, and always backed out. At the time, RNY was the only option, and I just couldn't get on board with the malabsorption thing (and still can't). So, I thought I might regret it, and I never went through with it. Once I learned of VSG, I KNEW it would be the right decision for me, and I have not regretted it. Lots of people say their only regret is not doing it sooner, and while I do wish I had this option 20 years ago, I do not regret having a surgery I knew I would regret.

You're telling my story, too, including being a nurse. I first looked into WLS nearly 40 years ago when the only option was intestinal bypass. I'm certainly glad I did not have that. The majority of people who did have it died within 5-10 years, usually less. I've know about gastric bypass for many years but am not at all comfortable with the malabsorption issues. I had never heard of VSG until a year ago & when I did I, too, knew it was the right procedure for me. I do wish the VSG had been around 30-40 years ago, but we cannot change what was & can only go forward from here. Had I still been working, I probably would have learned about it sooner. My one regret is that I didn't hear about VSG 4 years ago when my current insurance started covering it.

My surgeon did tell me at my first consult that he thought the duodenal switch would give me better weight loss & increase the chance of my diabetes resolving. But I told him I don't want anything to do with malabsorption & he said "that's all I need to hear."

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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