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I am having surgery on the 22nd. My parents have been going through a divorce for 2 years, both in serious relationships most of that time. The divorce was just finalized. My dad just took me out to lunch and told me he is getting married on the 26th and wants me to ride in the car for 2 hours to go to the wedding. He chose not to tell me that e was getting married until after I set my surgery date. He got all upset and started crying when I told him I didn't think I could make it.. What do you all think?? Is it ok to ride in a car for 2 hours, 4 days after gastric bypass?? I don't know what it feels like so I don't know of it's ok!!!? He said he would get us a hotel room so we didn't have to drive it twice in one day.

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I wouldn't do it. You'll spend the first two nights in hospital and then you'll just want to be at home until you feel comfortable. From everything I've seen and read, those first few days are extremely tender and the last thing you'll feel like is being politely sociable, sorry :-(

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First few days I was MISERABLE and in so much pain. I could barely walk or move. Your heart may be in it but you probably wouldn't physically be able to handle it.

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I would say definitely NOT !!! You will be tired, sore and just want to relax I couldn't imagine riding in a car 2hrs away on 4 days post op... Not to mention dressing up! Your gonna be swollen and in pain, trying to remember to drink all day and sooo tired! They will have just rearranged your insides!!! If you go more than likely you will really wish you hadn't !

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Nope...there is no way I would have done that. At 4 days I was in a lot if pain just sitting. I can't imagine 2 hours in a car. You will need to be focusing on yourself.....those first few days are difficult just trying to sip your liquids. Also, although I wasn't, a lot of people are nauseous afterwards. Car sickness?

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Not a chance I'd do that and I sailed through surgery. I slept for days after I got home. No way could I have coped with a long car ride or dressing up and socializing. I even kept phone calls to a minimum.

This is major surgery. If the situation were reversed and he'd just had an appendectomy, would he do it? I think not. He can chose to reschedule the wedding or you can send best wishes and Celebrate with them later.

Take care of yourself! Your health is your #1 priority now.

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You would be miserable. Trust me. You will not want to be out of the house. You won't feel terrible if you stay home, but pushing it too far is SO not worth it. trust me.

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I was in horrible pain in the beginning. I had to stay in the hospital a week, so thinks didn't go as I planned. I could not have made it the ride home from the hospital was hard i felt every bump in the road and even with a pillow, it hurt.

This is big for ur dad and really wants u there. U might b lucky and b able to handle it. Talk to ur doc and see what they say.

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If you're going to do it, I suggest a puffy pillow to hold against you and your liquid narcotics pushed together a little too close, time wise. ... I wasn't in terrible pain after leaving the hospital and drove an hour and a half home on day two without too much discomfort. Maybe make tentative plans pending your pain level. You should access the way you feel the day before the trip - only you will know if you can handle it. =)

HW- 290, SW (4/8/13) - 270.6, CW - 187

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I'd be concerned about wearing a seat belt for that long. I think that no one would have any idea if you COULD do it. Everyone is different in how much pain they experience, how they deal with it, how they feel after (tired, achy, nauseous, swollen, gas pain, etc). Some people have to spend longer in the hospital for various reasons. There are so many unknowns that no one can guess at. Even you may not not know until the day of the wedding and you may need to decline last minute.

As to whether or not you SHOULD do it, your doctor could advise you on that. I wouldn't go if it were me. The gas pains were pretty uncomfortable a few days out. That would've made me miserable in public. And I was still napping.

It's a hard choice to make...

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No way. You feel every bump in the road the first week or two. Plus there is a good chance you will still have a drain tube. They require care in a sterile setting. Not all surgeons leave them in though. You will also need lots of rest. There is no way of knowing whether or not you will have complications.

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No way could I have done that! I was nauseous, in pain and didn't get dressed. A shower wiped me out.

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I was back to work 7 days after surgery, but everyone is different. I would ask your surgeon !!!!

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I personally would not have been able to do it. I had to ride back from the hospital and it took 1 1/2 hours. I was miserable. Plus, although I realize your parents divorce lasted 2 years and both had serious relationships during that time...it WAS just finalized and your surgery was scheduled first. I'm sorry to say this....but to me, to me only and I hope I don't offend, it sounds like your dad is being selfish. If it was so important that you be there, he should have checked your schedule. It's not like you have a hair appointment to dye your roots...you're having a full on gastric bypass. It's kind of a big deal.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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