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Afraid to Fail... AGAIN



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I am revising from the Sleeve to Bypass, and after reading how many people still fail with the bypass, I am really afraid I will be one of them. I started out at 250 before my sleeve 15 months ago, and now I am 185. I am 5ft 3in. I still need to lose another 50-60 lbs. I stopped losing after 6 months with my sleeve, and was approved for revision a couple weeks ago. I admit that I lost all motivation after my weight loss with the sleeve came to a halt. I have a really powerful appetite and ZERO willpower, and I am afraid this wont work for me and I will f*** this up too. I already feel pathetic enough, and I'm really hoping that this second surgery will kick my butt into gear. Anyone have or had the same worries? How do/did you deal?

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I totally feel the same way! I am having a revision from a band, but unlike you, I gained all my 60 lb back that I lost. My willpower is nil, so I hope someone can give us some encouragement - when is your surgery? Mine is the 19th.

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At my lowest I was about 173, so I did gain some back! I'm sure without this 2nd surgery, and with time, I'd gain more. I wish you luck! Mine is the 13th!!

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I think, in this case, fear of failure is a good thing (as long as it doesn't become an obsession). It means you're really thinking about this and really want it. I think many people walk in to bariatric surgery thinking its the magic cure and voila! They'll be skinny. The truth is, it ain't easy. Oh it is MUCH easier than losing without the surgery and I personally think its a little bit magic but I still have to watch what I eat, make the right choices, and get off my butt and exercise (my own personal weakness). It's so nice not feeling like I'm starving all the time, I no longer wake up thinking about what I'll be eating all day long, in fact on weekends I have to make myself eat in the morning, I'm just not hungry yet.

You will do fine, take that fear and run with it, use it as your motivation. You got this.

HW 312, pre-op (RNY) 255, current weight 204.2

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I was wondering how long one needed to wait. I had the sleeve 9/28/12 and I have only lost 40 lbs. I am able to eat anything I want and am so frustrated! Will I have to through the whole process again? Meaning pre op stuff. Track diets ect???

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I don't think any surgery is going ti give you willpower. You still have to choose what to put in your body. If you have had the surgery and are still eating unhealthy foods...even if they don't make you ill...you might want to explore went you are doing that.

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I don't think any surgery is going ti give you willpower. You still have to choose what to put in your body. If you have had the surgery and are still eating unhealthy foods...even if they don't make you ill...you might want to explore went you are doing that.

I agree with you! It is important that you are mentally ready to make serious changes in your eating habits. You have to be ready to give up unhealthy habits and embrace a new way of life or you will find yourself unsuccessful. This surgery is a blessing but you have to be ready to make changes for a lifetime or you will fail!

I'm 21 weeks post op and I've embraced a healthy lifestyle. I am exercising and trying my best to eat right. I still enjoy good food but I've given up fried foods and high fat food. I just completed a 5k last Saturday, Something I never thought I would accomplish. You can do it just get your head in the game and commit to making the necessary changes! Good luck! I wish you the best.

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Just curious, why gastric bypass instead of duodenal switch? I thought DS was the sister surgery to VSG. And I totally understand the fear of failure. I feel the same way ans have had surgery just a few weeks ago. That feeling inside me to want to eat more food than I should is still there. I'm hoping that over time it subsides enough to ignore since it will not be physically possible and/or I will feel significant pain if I try to go off track. I wish for the best for you and highly recommend local support groups before and after surgery.

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I was wondering how long one needed to wait. I had the sleeve 9/28/12 and I have only lost 40 lbs. I am able to eat anything I want and am so frustrated! Will I have to through the whole process again? Meaning pre op stuff. Track diets ect???

I didn't. The surgeon (even if a different surgeon) will submit it as a revision and you shouldn't have to. I was approved right away. Make sure you tell them you have acid reflux.

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Will they be able to tell if I have acid reflux

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Will they be able to tell if I have acid reflux

No just tell them you take Prilosec everyday. My insurance with UHC approved right away.

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Just curious' date=' why gastric bypass instead of duodenal switch? I thought DS was the sister surgery to VSG. And I totally understand the fear of failure. I feel the same way ans have had surgery just a few weeks ago. That feeling inside me to want to eat more food than I should is still there. I'm hoping that over time it subsides enough to ignore since it will not be physically possible and/or I will feel significant pain if I try to go off track. I wish for the best for you and highly recommend local support groups before and after surgery.[/quote']

My surgeon said I would lose too much weight with the DS because when I was only 185.

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I wonder at 245 which would be the better one to ask for.

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
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    • Doughgurl

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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