Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

What is a realistic goal weight?



Recommended Posts

when i was first coming up with my goal, i googled height/weight and for my height (5'1) the chart i found said i should weigh between 105-115. so i choose 115 as my end goal since it was on the higher end. my mom is 4'11 and weighs 98 (naturally) and she has a bigger frame then i do. so my goal didn't seem too unrealistic to me...

but... the very few people i have told have all said in a concerned tone of voice that 115 is not realistic and i would be scary skinny at 115. :)

so now i have doubts and i'm just not sure. i want a goal to work towards but i don't want to set myself up for disappointment.:phanvan

how did you guys decide what to make your goal?

i am really interested in how you came up with yours!!! did you research the height/weight thing? did you have a doctor advise you? did you just pick a number out of the air and deem it your magic number?

thanks! :hug:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What I have chosen to do is have a rough figure in my head based on a weight that I felt good at in the past and charts, but I accept that as we get older most will have trouble getting back to the weights we were when we were 20yrs old. So I am setting mini goals- when I reach one I re evaluate how wether I have more to lose etc. If I get to the point that I am say 20 punds over what the cahrts say is ideal and I have been struggling to lsoe weightl or maintain weight loss- I would probably revise it. live it for a while then look again!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Uhhh... I was totally just guessing. I've never been thin as an adult, hell, not even as a teenager. So I just sort of went with a number that got me out of obesity-range on the BMI side of the scale! LOL.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My doctor picked the number. She said it was based on the fact that most people lose 70% of their excess weight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My doctor picked the number. She said it was based on the fact that most people lose 70% of their excess weight.

but then you'd have to know how much you should weigh to determine how much your excess weight is and thus how much to lose, right? so the doc would be the one that comes up with that number? i wonder what they base it on... :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is a bit of a bone of contention for me.

First and foremost I think the right weight for you is the one YOU choose, and if that's 20 lb above your ideal weight then so be it.

But it does disturb me that so many people say "I should weigh 115 but that would be too skinny, its ridiculous, so I'm shooting for 135". That makes no sense to me. If its your ideal healthy weight range, it wont be too skinny (but you personally might not like how you look at that weight, especially if you end up looking older!). There's nothing that says that because you've been obese, that you're not allowed to reach a healthy weight. Personally, I think in many cases, its a reflection of how obese people simply cannot see themselves as they are, and the fear that many have of truly being of normal weight. They feel they must stop short of that for some reason.

On the other hand if you have to exist on 900 calories a day and exercise for two hours a day to maintain your "ideal" weight you may not want to do that and I cant say I'd blame you. I would choose to be heavier too.

It depends what your goals are and how difficult you find your weight to maintain. It also depends a lot on what you're doing it for. At 39 and with no health problems, my motivation was to prevent future problems but was also a lot to do with vanity and how I look. So there's no way I'm stopping here at 180lb and 5ft 10. I didnt have surgery not to reach a weight low in my healthy weight range (based on my build of course). But if I were 55 and had beaten diabetes and back pain, reduced my sky high blood pressure and cholesterol through weight loss, I dont think I'd be disappointed with a weight that was a big higher!

Its entirely your choice. I knew I wanted to get to 75kg at most when I started this journey, but I may adjust it when I get there, as will probably nearly everyone who's initially picked a 70% weight lost number or a no longer obese number.

You stop where you're happy and all that matters is that YOU'RE happy.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am 5'10 with a large frame and naturally large breasts....currently 278.

The "charts" say I should weight 140!

BUT...I had a complete screening with a nutritionist who used some sort of water/fat machine she hooked up to me. With my height and frame...

she says a healthy weight for me would be at 186.

You have to find out what a realistic weight would be for you as an (individual). Also, the weight that you are comfortable with. Those

charts are not made to fit everyone. Good luck in your journey.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest Band4EJ

When I got hired at the job I still work at I weighed 116 pounds. Nobody thought I looked "scary skinny" then. Seven years later I gained about 100 pounds over an 18 month period. Then, I turned around and dieted off 85 pounds. People at work were telling me I was "too thin" and asking whether I had an eating disorder despite the fact that I was still 15 pounds heavier than when they had first met me. Isn't it funny that nobody considers you might have gained weight because of an eating disorder??? I think people get used to us being large and that includes our faces. When you do lose weight you look weird to the people that know you. You probably look perfectly normal to strangers. I'm going for 130-135 but I have also heard that 70% can be lost with the lab band. So...I guess the rest will be blood, sweat and tears!

I think what previous posters have said is true. You have to go to a point where you feel healthy and attractive and are strong enough to do all the things you want to do in your life. If you get there and people call you "scary skinny"....go get underwater weighed and find out your true BMI for yourself. If the doctor tells you you are healthy...ignore the naysayers.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Darrylkeelf

        dating site just for sex in florissant- https://allwarrior.xyz/?dj7sZN

      3. Darrylkeelf

        dating site just for sex in florissant- https://allwarrior.xyz/?dj7sZN

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×