Over-researched - thinking about cancelling surgery

MCOBandita · February 12, 2007

I have been obsessed with researching everything I can about the band and people's post-op experiences. I think I have over-researched and am now feeling very discouraged about the band.

Tremendous Gas Pains, PBing, Ports Flipping, Need for Revision Surgery, Slippage, Erosion, Unable to Eat Certain Normal Foods EVER (grapes, rice, bread, salads, leafy greens, red meat, chicken, etc., etc., etc.), Not Losing Weight (particularly after the first 18 months) - I am freaking out.

I want the band to help me not have my life so food-centric. It seems to me that there are so many people out there who have had so many significant problems that they have to think/worry about food every moment of their days. I am seriously beginning to wonder if I should even have the surgery. I am in good physical shape - it isn't so much what I eat as much as the sheer volume. I have read numerous stories from banders stating that since they aren't able to eat ____ they are making what I feel are bad food choices in order to "just eat something." I feel desperate about my weight and have been hoping that the band would finally provide me with the extra control I needed - now I am wondering if it will even bring more stress and problems in my life. :help:

Any advice or insight would be greatly appreciated.

lisah25 · February 12, 2007

I have been obsessed with researching everything I can about the band and people's post-op experiences. I think I have over-researched and am now feeling very discouraged about the band.
Tremendous Gas Pains, PBing, Ports Flipping, Need for Revision Surgery, Slippage, Erosion, Unable to Eat Certain Normal Foods EVER (grapes, rice, bread, salads, leafy greens, red meat, chicken, etc., etc., etc.), Not Losing Weight (particularly after the first 18 months) - I am freaking out.

I want the band to help me not have my life so food-centric. It seems to me that there are so many people out there who have had so many significant problems that they have to think/worry about food every moment of their days. I am seriously beginning to wonder if I should even have the surgery. I am in good physical shape - it isn't so much what I eat as much as the sheer volume. I have read numerous stories from banders stating that since they aren't able to eat ____ they are making what I feel are bad food choices in order to "just eat something." I feel desperate about my weight and have been hoping that the band would finally provide me with the extra control I needed - now I am wondering if it will even bring more stress and problems in my life. :help:

Any advice or insight would be greatly appreciated.

Take a deep breath. Relax.

Ok, now I have a couple of thoughts. Very few, if any, people have all the complications you list. Many have none of them. Some do have complications, and yes they can be serious. And you need to know there is risk. However, think about the risk of staying overweight, and what that does to our bodies and minds. And one big drawback to being on great groups like this is that those who post tend to be either new, or having problems. So you can get a skewed idea of what post-band life is like. The worst I've had happen so far is a few PBs. When I've eaten too much, or not chewed enough. I can eat pretty much anything I want, but I don't do much bread or Pasta, carbs aren't good for me.

If you can't eat healthy foods, lean Protein for example, I think that is a sign of being too tight. A key, IMHO, to doing well with the band is knowing it's not a matter of having surgery, then going on without a thought. You have to be active in it, following up on getting a good fill level, communicating with your clinic team. It will take some time to learn how to live with your band.

I LOVE my band. I don't think about food all day anymore. I'll plan what I want to bring to work for the day, then when I start to get hungry, I eat. Other then that, I'm not obessing about what I am going to eat, or not eat, or what I did eat. It's the first time in my life I've felt normal about food and eating. It's a wonderful feeling.

christy · February 12, 2007

There are risks with getting the surgery, and I think that not being able to eat certain foods EVER is probably the most common one (I can't do scrambled eggs, or broccoli)

The band has really helped me become less food centeric -- I'm not hungry all the time, I don't spend all day thinking about what I'm going to eat next, I don't have to worry about making myself stop eating before I feel satisfied. For the first time in my life I think that I'm eating like a normal person is supposed to eat.

But there are times when it is hard -- when I'm full but I want to taste just a little more, or when my head really wants popcorn or something, and I just can't do it. It's totally worth it for those few times, though.

lianna · February 12, 2007

The band is probably the most effective for volume eaters, because that is exactly what it helps with. The band is not so effective on "head hunger" that many people struggle with. I dont know what to tell you about your fears, because they are valid. However, you do realize the gas pain is a temporary thing post surgery, and the food issues are individual. I can eat meat, chicken, salad, etc... but not bread. Also, there are several thousand registered users on LBT and some people only post when they have a problem, wanting support or even just some empathy. Erosion, slippage, etc.. are not the norm and affect a tiny percentage of bandsters. I knew the stats when I had my surgery and thought the small risk of future issues was worth it. If something happened to my band today and it had to be removed I would not regret it for a second. The last year has really helped me get a grip and refocus on eating healthy, making good choices, and controlling my portions....something I was unable to do before. I felt the same way you do before I had surgery. I spent 4 months trying to do it "on my own" one last time and lost 20 lbs. The second I stopped being diligent and went back to my old habits I gained that 20 back (plus 7). This had been my life cycle for the past 15-20 years (lose, regain, lose, regain) and made me realize I obviously couldnt do it my own and had to try something different. I cant encourage you or discourage from having the lapband. You need to figure out if you think it will be right for you, and worth any possible complications.

ReneBean · February 12, 2007

Sara -

For every complication that you see - there are 10 Bandsters that have NONE. I am one of the ten. I have no complications, I can eat any food, and I am still losing weight - although slowly.

I feel the band is the best decision I have ever made for myself. I am not hungry all the time not suffering in any way - not really even on a diet - and I am still losing approx. 3 pounds every month since surgery.

Just the forced slowing down caused by the need to chew everything was enough to help me to lose. Add the exercise in, and I am on a slow but steady track to lose 35-50 lbs a year.

Now, that IS less than the standard 1-2 pounds a week thing - but keep in mind that I have 1) no side effects. 2) no deprivation.

I eat cake at the company birthday parties. I eat pizza if I want it. I just don't eat as much. I keep a loose count on my calories - and I try to keep them in the 1500/day range (but I don't always).

With some MINIMAL amt of self control and discipline (truly minimal amts) I keep losing - and you can too.

Please don't be frightened by the complications that some people experience.

Yes, in the first week or two after surgery - there is gas and it can hurt - but it eases and then it is gone. Gas meds help MOST people to get past it.

For me, that was it. That was all. No acid reflux, no forbidden foods, no constant PB's.

The chances of you having ANY of the side effects is pretty small. And nobody has them ALL. I think the risks are pretty minimal in comparison to the benefits. Having the band makes it easy for me to make better decisions about how much to eat.

Now, the band IS just a tool. WHAT to eat is still up to me - and that can be both good and bad - but at least it is my decision. I am not ruled by that gnawing empty feeling that I used to get every time I went on a diet. I don't spend endless hours trying to figure out how I am going to get the most volume for the least calories. I now get to choose quality over quantity. In fact I hardly think about food except at meal times.

Seriously. No lie. I am so stinkin' happy that I can hardly contain myself. I get to live a normal life! I get to eat normal foods! I am still losing weight! The band is to dieting what the lighter is to fire. Yeah, you could start that fire by rubbing two sticks together for hours - but why on earth would you if you can just flic your bic?

If you want to try one more time to "do it on your own" - you go ahead... Struggle every day to lose - and then continue to struggle every day to maintain that loss..... But if you can't stand the thought of another deprivation diet - you might want to stop hanging out in the complications forum and start reading some of the happier threads. Check out the Before & After thread. Check out the Exercise forum.

Try not to let the negative overwhelm your mind. There is an awful lot of positive out there, too.

Hugs, and good luck!

marjon9 · February 12, 2007

I have been obsessed with researching everything I can about the band and people's post-op experiences. I think I have over-researched and am now feeling very discouraged about the band.
Tremendous Gas Pains, PBing, Ports Flipping, Need for Revision Surgery, Slippage, Erosion, Unable to Eat Certain Normal Foods EVER (grapes, rice, bread, salads, leafy greens, red meat, chicken, etc., etc., etc.), Not Losing Weight (particularly after the first 18 months) - I am freaking out.

I want the band to help me not have my life so food-centric. It seems to me that there are so many people out there who have had so many significant problems that they have to think/worry about food every moment of their days. I am seriously beginning to wonder if I should even have the surgery. I am in good physical shape - it isn't so much what I eat as much as the sheer volume. I have read numerous stories from banders stating that since they aren't able to eat ____ they are making what I feel are bad food choices in order to "just eat something." I feel desperate about my weight and have been hoping that the band would finally provide me with the extra control I needed - now I am wondering if it will even bring more stress and problems in my life. :help:

Any advice or insight would be greatly appreciated.

My comments may not be like most of the others. I am not certain that lap band surgery is strongly indicated in your case. You have a relatively modest amount of weight to lose. If you get your BMI under 35 you won't even be "seriously obese" anymore, just obese. Even now, you are not morbidly obese. Many doctors would not even be willing to do the surgery on you with this BMI, and insurance probably will not pay for it. (You've probably already found it, but you may want to look for a thread on here called "Lower BMI Bandsters." There might be some additional information for you that would be useful.) The band changes your life significantly. I think a person with 65 pounds to lose should think more than once whether this surgery is right for them.

It is true that the complications that involve serious health risks are extremely rare. Even slippage and erosion are almost never serious health risks unless ignored. A port infection can be serious, but again, it is almost never serious if it is taken care of when it should be.

The other items on your list are ordinarily just minor inconveniences, at worst. Gas pains and other pains are associated with the surgery. These pains are almost never significant after the first week, two weeks at most. There is almost never any pain once the surgery has healed.

It is also true that many people find that they do not tolerate various types of "normal" foods, and just tend to stop eating them. This can be anything from steak, chicken, bread, Pasta, rice, vegetables, salads, etc.

But on the other hand almost everyone can still eat a wide variety of foods, and after a while people tend to stop missing the foods they don't tolerate well. I used to love bread and Pasta. I no longer even want to eat these foods, and I've only been banded about 4 weeks.

In addition, the foods that I do eat really do taste much better. Many bandsters have this experience. Rather than wolfing food indiscriminately, I now take the time to taste it, and the difference is significant. I can honestly say I "enjoy" eating now more than before, even though I may never again eat spaghetti, pizza, or even a sandwich.

And it feels wonderful to lose weight. I'm down almost 25 pounds so far. Already I can tie my shoes more easily, get in and out of cars more easily, I fit in a size smaller pants already, and I feel like I am going to be free from my CPAP machine (for sleep apnea) within months, I'll be able to shed my blood pressure medicine, my pre-diabetic condition will not turn into diabetes, and I'll be able to have a more active life all the way around.

But in your case, I'd think about it twice. You say you are "desparate" about your weight, but you are still within a range where diet and exercise may really be able to work for you.

Good luck figuring it all out.

MCOBandita · February 12, 2007

However, think about the risk of staying overweight, and what that does to our bodies and minds.

Yes, the emotional damage I have sustained from being overweight has been tremendous...this really made me think about my long term motivations for my decision.

GayleTX · February 12, 2007

Have to talked to a surgeon to see if you even qualify. I see that you are only 65 lbs overweight. I understand that Inamed (the manufacturer) and most ethical surgeon (and all insurance companies) require you be 100 lbs overweight or ,if not quite there, then that you have significant weight -related co-morbidities (illnesses). I would suggest talking to a surgeon before you agonize over a decision any more.....you may not have a decision to make.

MCOBandita · February 12, 2007

All of these comments were really helpful to me and have helped relieve some of my fears/recognize that I am really just overthinking things...

“I'm not hungry all the time, I don't spend all day thinking about what I'm going to eat next, I don't have to worry about making myself stop eating before I feel satisfied. For the first time in my life I think that I'm eating like a normal person is supposed to eat.” I would love to feel this way.

“This had been my life cycle for the past 15-20 years (lose, regain, lose, regain) and made me realize I obviously couldnt do it my own and had to try something different.” Last year really felt like the last straw for me. I was working out with a trainer twice a week and working out on my own 2-3 times a week and still had problems losing weight. I lost inches but did not lose pounds and it really took a toll on me. I felt that with all of that effort I really should have been seeing better results. I am tired of failing and really feel I have come to the point where I need to see some significant results for my sanity.

“Just the forced slowing down caused by the need to chew everything was enough to help me to lose. Add the exercise in, and I am on a slow but steady track to lose 35-50 lbs a year…Struggle every day to lose - and then continue to struggle every day to maintain that loss...” Even if the band lets me see a more modest loss as long as I am no longer gaining and have a greater sense of control over food I feel like I will have been a success.

MCOBandita · February 12, 2007

Marjon and Gayle:

My start weight was 215 and I am 5'3". For my ticker I used my first goal of 150 pounds, which would be a loss of 65 pounds. Ultimately, if I could I would like to get down to 130, which would be a loss of 85 pounds.

I had researched the band several years ago but quickly came to the conclusion that I could not qualify. While I am considered to be in good overall health there have been several issues which have started to develop which caused me to start reinvestigating the band. I have PCOS, glucose intolerance, and elevated cholesterol. Diabetes, heart disease, hypertension, and sleep apnea which all run in my family are "in my future" if I do not lose the weight according to my PCP.

I went to a local surgeon in FL who approved me for the band and subsequently decided to go with Dr. Ortiz in Mexico. I will be a self-pay.

When it comes down to it though for me the emotional damage I have felt from being overweight is a huge motivating factor for me. I know that a lot of people have a start weight which is much higher than mine and they would be thankful to be at my weight. It may sound crass to some, but I used to be considered one of the prettiest girls growing up. I received a lot of attention for my looks, and was treated very differently from men and women. Please try to remember that everyone has different thresholds of pain they can feel before they feel like they are broken and miserable. I have basically become a hermit over the years.

I do not want to get those looks from strangers, or run into old friends who look at me like "what happened to her?!?", or hear someone say you would be so pretty if you only lost weight, or have a child follow me into a dressing room chanting "you look fat", or have an old lady loudly proclaim to her daughter "look how fat she is", have a man say "I think you are really smart, funny, and a great person but you are just too fat for me.", or in other instances feel like an invisible person when I am in public. I just can't take it anymore.

a1m1bishop · February 12, 2007

My comments may not be like most of the others. I am not certain that lap band surgery is strongly indicated in your case. You have a relatively modest amount of weight to lose. If you get your BMI under 35 you won't even be "seriously obese" anymore, just obese. Even now, you are not morbidly obese. Many doctors would not even be willing to do the surgery on you with this BMI, and insurance probably will not pay for it. (You've probably already found it, but you may want to look for a thread on here called "Lower BMI Bandsters." There might be some additional information for you that would be useful.) The band changes your life significantly. I think a person with 65 pounds to lose should think more than once whether this surgery is right for them.
It is true that the complications that involve serious health risks are extremely rare. Even slippage and erosion are almost never serious health risks unless ignored. A port infection can be serious, but again, it is almost never serious if it is taken care of when it should be.

The other items on your list are ordinarily just minor inconveniences, at worst. Gas pains and other pains are associated with the surgery. These pains are almost never significant after the first week, two weeks at most. There is almost never any pain once the surgery has healed.

It is also true that many people find that they do not tolerate various types of "normal" foods, and just tend to stop eating them. This can be anything from steak, chicken, bread, Pasta, rice, vegetables, salads, etc.

But on the other hand almost everyone can still eat a wide variety of foods, and after a while people tend to stop missing the foods they don't tolerate well. I used to love bread and Pasta. I no longer even want to eat these foods, and I've only been banded about 4 weeks.

In addition, the foods that I do eat really do taste much better. Many bandsters have this experience. Rather than wolfing food indiscriminately, I now take the time to taste it, and the difference is significant. I can honestly say I "enjoy" eating now more than before, even though I may never again eat spaghetti, pizza, or even a sandwich.

And it feels wonderful to lose weight. I'm down almost 25 pounds so far. Already I can tie my shoes more easily, get in and out of cars more easily, I fit in a size smaller pants already, and I feel like I am going to be free from my CPAP machine (for sleep apnea) within months, I'll be able to shed my blood pressure medicine, my pre-diabetic condition will not turn into diabetes, and I'll be able to have a more active life all the way around.

But in your case, I'd think about it twice. You say you are "desparate" about your weight, but you are still within a range where diet and exercise may really be able to work for you.

Good luck figuring it all out.

Hi there 4 weeks. yeah good for you. Have you found a shut off valve??? How ong before you could go back to work am hoping to get banded myself in the next 3 moths

marjon9 · February 12, 2007

That all makes sense to me. I think you are making the right decision. I just think it is something to think about when you have a low BMI. The band is not particularly risky to your health, but it is a major life change. The band forces you to make this change because in its way it is rather similar to a brick wall. You are not going to drive through it even if you feel like a "binge." That's why it works, but that is also why it can be quite a challenge. When you get the band, you start a whole new life.

Did you see the move "Splash" where at the end Tom Hanks joins the mermaid Daryl Hannah for his new life underwater? The band is sort of like that. Nothing is ever the same again. (Unless you take it out, of course.)

marjon9 · February 12, 2007

Hi there 4 weeks. yeah good for you. Have you found a shut off valve??? How ong before you could go back to work am hoping to get banded myself in the next 3 moths

Hello a1m1bishop. Yes I have found a shut off valve. That's what the band is. An unforgiving shut off valve. When you have a fight with the band, the band wins, every time. I had a little bit of a rough time recovering from surgery. I felt like crap for about ten days. Many people recovery more quickly. I went back to work in two weeks. Some are able to go back in a few days. As you spend some time looking on this site you'll find discussion of these issues and many others that will come to your mind. Enjoy.

cutiepie6 · February 12, 2007

MCO Bandita -- I understand how you feel. I am getting banded next Thursday and I have had questions whirling around in my head for 2 years regarding this banding. However, just like everyone else - nothing else has worked and sometimes all we focus on are the bad things that happen. Focus on the good things. This banding will be what you want it to be.

Make it work! My problem has always been quantity and now I have a "tool" to use to help me with that. So, take a deep breath -- relax and let it go for a day or two then come back to it. I love food but I love my life more and I will make this work --- so can you. Talk to your docs about all your anxiety.

I'll keep you posted on how it goes for me -- maybe that will help you...

lianna · February 12, 2007

Actually with a BMI of 38.1 and your health and history you would probably qualify. A BMI of 35 with comorbitities qualifies. It would boil down to whether or not your insurance covers banding.