Roadside shrines

[giveyouthemoon 4]

I was interested to read all the different states where people are saying they see the shrines. I thought it was just a southwestern thing. I was raised in New Mexico, a predominately Hispanic and Native American state. Shrines are common and quite accepted there due to the place they have in Hispanic culture.

Due to things like Dia de los Muertos, the Latino cultures believe that you Celebrate the person who meant something to you and who has passed, thus altars and shrines are put up for them, especially in the case where someone died tragically or unexpectedly. And yes, in the example of someone suddenly dying at work...you do sometimes see them at places of business.

I think maybe some of the misunderstanding comes from the different ways that different people and different cultures look at death and dying. Western cultures tend to make it more of a somber and quiet thing. Latino cultures make it a cause for a form of honoring and loud grieving and also celebration of the person. Eastern cultures see death as a passage to the next phase of life and the person who died is seen as almost "evolving".

None are more right than the other, just different I suppose.

[niecyrenee 2]

The other thing I really don't understand is why people make tributes out of their vehicles. I don't know if this is done everywhere because honestly, I travel a LOT and I've never seen one outside of my own state (thought that could be coincidence), but here people people very frequently have "In memory of John Doe, 1980 - 2004" stickers on their back windows. Usually next a Dale Earnhart (sp) "3" and Calvin peeing on whatever make of car they aren't driving.

When I read your post I thought "We have that horrible practice here too". Then I remembered that we were "neighbors" and got to wondering how it got started. (Probably all the rednecks!) They are becomming more and more popular and I for one, don't care for them. I want to remember someone for who they were and what they did, not for their tragic death.

I know a lot of people put those shrines up along side the road and it helps them heal so to speak, but I don't get it. I certainly wouldn't want to remember a loved one by the place they died in. Around here some organization or something must put them up for everyone who dies in a MVA because they are all alike. Then people come and put the added things up. The DOT leaves the crosses up but most of the other things are removed after a period of time. I find them very distracting and after a while, an eyesore.

[green 6]

I was interested to read all the different states where people are saying they see the shrines. I thought it was just a southwestern thing. I was raised in New Mexico, a predominately Hispanic and Native American state. Shrines are common and quite accepted there due to the place they have in Hispanic culture.

Due to things like Dia de los Muertos, the Latino cultures believe that you Celebrate the person who meant something to you and who has passed, thus altars and shrines are put up for them, especially in the case where someone died tragically or unexpectedly. And yes, in the example of someone suddenly dying at work...you do sometimes see them at places of business.

I think maybe some of the misunderstanding comes from the different ways that different people and different cultures look at death and dying. Western cultures tend to make it more of a somber and quiet thing. Latino cultures make it a cause for a form of honoring and loud grieving and also celebration of the person. Eastern cultures see death as a passage to the next phase of life and the person who died is seen as almost "evolving".

None are more right than the other, just different I suppose.

I find your post very interesting. Of course different cultures do have a different way of approaching death and it is great to learn something new about this. Thanks for posting this.

[rtgirl77 0]

I live in FL and its very common place to see the memorial decals on cars, as well as Calvin and Dale Earnhardt's big number 3. I've seen MANY shrines to dead people both on the highways and in front of homes where children have died. I hear people placed stuff on Anna Nicole's doorstep in the Bahamas and thats not even where she died! I'm not sure what fuels that need but I think it stems from people needing to do something and it is usually people who probably weren't close enough to a person to even be able to find the actual grave if they had to. The memorial decals are usually found on the cars of teens or of people who, looking at them, may not be in the upper eschelon of society. Thats here in FL, though, I'm not sure how things are in other places.

[ralheit 0]

I don't think I have a problem so much with the shrines immediately after the incident. It's just that they are there forever and they become dirty and broken. I don't think that honors anyone. I feel that after a short time, they should be removed. Keep the memory of the person at home or in the cemetary, not on the side of the road.

[Tired_Old_Man 1]

Keep the shrines in your heart, not on the road.

[MarySue33 0]

The other thing I really don't understand is why people make tributes out of their vehicles. I don't know if this is done everywhere because honestly, I travel a LOT and I've never seen one outside of my own state (thought that could be coincidence), but here people people very frequently have "In memory of John Doe, 1980 - 2004" stickers on their back windows. Usually next a Dale Earnhart (sp) "3" and Calvin peeing on whatever make of car they aren't driving.

We have those here, too. I had never seen them until I moved south of the Mason-Dixon. My kids and I have commented on them and my son said that he thought that maybe the new "in loving memory" car was purchased with the insurance money from the accident. It sounds crass, but I have started to think that he might be right. My daughter made a good point when she asked, "Mom...what about when this car is old and they get rid of it? What happens to their loving memory, then?" A good question, I thought.

I often have wondered if the roadside shrines have ever caused additional accidents because of people taking their eyes off the road to look at them or if people pull over to look at them or to place flowers, balloons, etc. on them if they, too, might cause the potential for further accidents. I could see it happening.

[anonemouse 1]

I was interested to read all the different states where people are saying they see the shrines. I thought it was just a southwestern thing. I was raised in New Mexico, a predominately Hispanic and Native American state. Shrines are common and quite accepted there due to the place they have in Hispanic culture.

They are very prevalent here in the South. Along with the Earnhart stickers and "In Loving Memory of Kitty 19xx-20xx).

I often have wondered if the roadside shrines have ever caused additional accidents because of people taking their eyes off the road to look at them or if people pull over to look at them or to place flowers, balloons, etc. on them if they, too, might cause the potential for further accidents. I could see it happening.

I don't doubt it happens. Whenever I see a roadside memorial, I crane my head to see if I can read the names.

[Carlene 12]

Close by my neighborhood, a new roadside memorial has been erected recently. A school mate of my granddaughter's was hit by a truck and killed, and I have no idea who erected the memorial, but it's obvious that others have added it (flowers, stuffed animals, etc). However, there were two young girls involved in that accident. The other will survive. What happens when she comes home and is confronted by this memorial on a daily basis? I think that in this case, it should be removed. Otherwise, I agree that they should stay up for a short time only - maybe 30 days.

Homes and businesses used to display funeral wreaths on the door when there was a death in the family. Does anyone still do this?

[Tired_Old_Man 1]

Homes and businesses used to display funeral wreaths on the door when there was a death in the family. Does anyone still do this?

Many people have stopped, because burglars target homes of people at funerals.

They are very prevalent here in the South.

I found them to be just as prevalent when I lived in Brooklyn NY.

[Gaffer 1]

These roadside shrines are becomming more & more common here as well (Alberta, Canada). I think on of the primary reasons why they are becoming popular is the guidelines that many cemetaries have for grave markers, and what you are allowed or not allowed to to around them.

I worked in cemetary in high school, and we constantly dealing with people doing things to loved ones grave stones which caused problems for the other "occupants". Things like planting flowers on the grave next to them or wanting to put in more elaborate landscaping that extended beyond their plot.

These roadside shrines are not subject to anything and people can pile all sorts of crap there at will.

I think they are a hazard, and should be taken down after a couple of weeks.

Andrew

[green 6]

Hey Gaffer, it's always good to hear from another Canuck. I had heard quite some time back that there were a lot of shrines in your province along the trans-Canada highway and that these proliferate in the mountainous areas in the Rockies. If that is true, maybe these shrines are as much a warning to travellers as anything else.

[crabcake 0]

I'm not crazy about the shrines either. They are slightly distracting. However, I understand the need/desire to make them. Two weeks ago the sweetest kid I've ever known was killed in a car accident. He was 18 and would have graduated this spring. His school chums made a shrine for him where he died and it's the only one they'll be able to make because he was buried in another state. So, they can be a good thing too.

[Gaffer 1]

Hey Gaffer, it's always good to hear from another Canuck. I had heard quite some time back that there were a lot of shrines in your province along the trans-Canada highway and that these proliferate in the mountainous areas in the Rockies. If that is true, maybe these shrines are as much a warning to travellers as anything else.

I dont know that there are anymore or less on the transcanada through the mountains, although that is a likely place to be in a fatal accident. There are plenty in Calgary along our major roadways, and they seem to be more common of rural highways.

I dont know why there are more here, but it is common to see them whereever you go. So many of them look like piles of garbage as the snow melts they get all covered in dirt.

There was a case in Lethbridge when I lived there a high school kid was killed crossing a major road. A bunch of students started camping in the median of this road, I guess as a tribute. It got to the point that the police had to remove them from the median, and of course all these people got pissed about it. Come on people, you cant camp in the median of a road in the middle of a city.

Greif does really odd things to people.

Andrew

[jeanettej505 0]

I was interested to read all the different states where people are saying they see the shrines. I thought it was just a southwestern thing. I was raised in New Mexico, a predominately Hispanic and Native American state. Shrines are common and quite accepted there due to the place they have in Hispanic culture.

Due to things like Dia de los Muertos, the Latino cultures believe that you Celebrate the person who meant something to you and who has passed, thus altars and shrines are put up for them, especially in the case where someone died tragically or unexpectedly. And yes, in the example of someone suddenly dying at work...you do sometimes see them at places of business.

I think maybe some of the misunderstanding comes from the different ways that different people and different cultures look at death and dying. Western cultures tend to make it more of a somber and quiet thing. Latino cultures make it a cause for a form of honoring and loud grieving and also celebration of the person. Eastern cultures see death as a passage to the next phase of life and the person who died is seen as almost "evolving".

None are more right than the other, just different I suppose.

I live in New Mexico and these memorials are every where. I thought it was just part of the Hispanic culture, and I'm suprised to see it throughout the U.S. These shrines don't bother me, and I guess because I grew up seeing them all over the place...I kinda don't even notice them anymore. People around here are pretty good about keeping them up and not letting them turn into a pile of trash. Maybe people have a problem with them because they don't want to think of the bad things that happen in life, but when I look at a shrine...it makes me think that someone loved that person, someone STILL loves them, and if it makes them feel better to honor that person with a cross on the side of the road...then let them have it!!