Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Need Advice



Recommended Posts

Ok so this is totally unrelated to rny but I need some advice....

I have this male friend, we have been good friends for about 2 years, and even attempted to go out but we never clicked that way. He is a great guy and often ladies take his kindness for weakness. I ended up introducing my single friend to him and they hit it off, after 4 months she ended it really bad and blew him off. Well recently we hung out and I have developed some feelings towards him and we eventually had sex. It was amazing. Lol but now I feel like a horrible friend cuz that's her ex but he was my friend first... I don't know what to think or do.....

Sent from my iPhone using RNYTalk

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

go with your gut. sounds like you have with this guy what relationships should be based on, FRIENDSHIP, so maybe it was meant to be all along. Hopefully your friend won't decide she wants him back and cause you all sorts of hurt. But be honest with her and tell her that he has always been a good friend to you and now things seem to be more.

Anyway I am happy for you. and sure hope it works out and you get to keep a great guy and a good friend.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Forget the other girl she let him go & now he has someone that won't hurt his feelings.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You're happiness is your own doing. If he makes you happy I see no reason why you can't date him especially since you knew him first and SHE dumped him.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks guys for your input. I am just so darn confused. I don't wanna hurt her but I wanna be happy at the same time. N he sure does make me happy.

Sent from my iPhone using RNYTalk

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ok, I'm a hopeless romantic. But, she dumped him. You knew him first. He's fair game. My husband was my best friend before we began dating and he is still my best friend. If he is the one for you, you need to go for it. If your interest in him is genuine and you don't you will regret it.

New Life Started 07/24/12

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Totally agree with the above most. Especially if she did him wrong an dumped him, if she has a problem with it then she ain't a good friend.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well not to mention that if you do truly care for him and don't go after him because of her. It will eventually ruin your friendship anyway because you may begin to resent her for it.

New Life Started 07/24/12

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I feel that everything happens for a reason. At this point in time in your life things are starting to fall into place for you. You are happy with yourself your looking good feeling good now you have a chance for a good relationship. I would shit down and let her know upfront but after that go on with you life enjoy being happy with this man. As long as your heart is clear and you know you didn't set out to hurt any it ok. She my not be your friend any more but at least you told her and she didn't find out a different way. Good Luck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×