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I Have Lost All Focus Completely.... :(



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The past 2 weeks have been so hard! I haven't had surgery yet it isn't until september or october but I am trying to stay on track with weight loss and working out and I've been cheating several times ....like last night I went out and got a huge ice cream Sunday and felt horrible afterwards. I feel like a failure. My husband has been laid off here and there for about 2 to 3 days a week for the past 2 months and it has been very stressful. I decided to let my gym membership go because I couldn't afford to pay for it anymore. I have a horrible problem with binge eating. I use to be bullemic (sp) a long time ago and every now and then I binge eat and want to do it again...obviosuly I don't bc I know its not the right thing to do or healthy. I just keep wondering if I can really make these changes and do this. Im feeling kind of lost and sad lately. Has anyone felt like this before surgery? Idk maybe its because it is still so far away that im feeling this way. I just want to be able to change my life. Im only 22 ...I have alot of years ahead of me...hopefully. I just wanna live my life and be able to do more things with my 4 yr old daughter. I need some advice :(

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You need to get your head back in the game!! Life will always have its ups and downs. You have to put you first for a change!! I suggest you see a therapist to talk to and help you through the next 4-5 months until surgery. It's ok to fall off track now and then. You need to do this for yourself and your 4 year old...... I'm here if you need to talk.

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It will get better :) I'm 25 and I'm trying to stay on track so I can keep up with my 4 year old daughter and 10 year old step daughter and my husband. I have cheated a few times also. I find out Thursday when my surgery is and they said I should have surgery by August 1st hopefully. Just keep reminding yourself why you are doing this. Also what I have found has helped me and post pictures of yourself at your heaviest all around your house especially in the kitchen. I did that and when I want ice cream or cake I see those pictures and I automatically get nauseas and grab a piece of fruit. It'll get better once your surgery date gets closer :) keep your head up

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Hi Jessica,

I think you should join a support group to start gaining control of your eating. I actually spent the last week before surgery enjoying small amounts of food I would not be able to have for a while. Most of the food I don't even think about - but 6 months down the road when your hungar comes back - you have to know how to eat or you will be very sick after your surgery.

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Don't lose hope you can do this:-) if you can't afford your gym membership then start a walking routine around your neighborhood. There are a lot of free things you can do to keep on track. Keep reading this app there are a lot of wonderful supportive people on here who all want you to succeed. Keep your head up girl I have faith in! I was in your spot a year ago and now my life has totally changed. Keep the faith:-)

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Thanks everyone! I was doing so good and lost ten pounds and now have gained it all back :( im trying to get back on track this week and staying on track. I've been going out walking alot but sometimes its hard because its so hot right now so I need to find an activity that doesn't cost much that I can do indoors. I love to swim so I might do that. But I don't think its clicked mentally for me yet that I have to change. Idk why....I feel weak like maybe I can't do this. Has anyone felt this way? It makes me sick to my stomach. You would think that knowing my weight is causing me to not get pregnant that I would just do what I need to do. But im am going to try so hard from here on out and try to get past the temptations. Im going to my 2nd time at the support group Thursday and I have an appointment so hopefully it will help me get back on track. Thanks again for the support!

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I was very positive until I started reading ppl stretching our there stomach & gaining weight. I thought this surgery was to give everyone a new beginning. Once you commit your self to a change like mist surgeon put you on a diet so your not suppose to cheat & still ppl cheat. After surgery follow your diet then a month at a time add different food there goes someone eating out of control. No one force anyone to get this surgery & I thought ppl was as serious as me. Stop harming your self by eating junk food. There is healthy version. I was searching on line found chips with Protein. Doesn't mean eat 20 bags but an occasionally bag of healthy chips won't harm you. Brownie delicious. chicken Pasta. Yes it's pricy but you wanna be fat again or healthy? I'm so disappointed. I wanna get slim & stay slim.

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I totally agree with you! It is so sad to see people years out from surgery looking worse than before they had it! Why would anyone spend all this money, time and effort to put themselves so something so serious and potentially dangerous as surgery to become healthy only to do damage to themselves and revert back to their old habits! I hope that I do not become one of those statistics after my surgery!

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You know, I have only been on this site now for a week and I can truly say that I am so addicted to it! I love it! The stories have been so informative and inspiring...everyone is kind. I will continue to use this awesome group for support! I appreciate the way everyone puts themselves out there for all to learn from! You all inspire me and I am truly grateful to have found such a wonderful bunch of people! Good night all!

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I've been feeling the same way and like you I want to be able to have another baby once it's safe to start trying I've found that looking at a pictures of my 4 year old son from when he was a newborn helps keep me on track. Nothing tastes as good as what holding a new baby is going to feel!

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I totally agree! I look at pictures of my 4 year old daughter all the time...or watch videos of her and it reminds me how much I love being a mom and how bad I wanna have another one. When is ur surgery? Or have u had it already?

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I haven't had my surgery yet we just got through all the paperwork with my insurance company and we're setting my surgery date at my next appointment with the surgeon on the 5th I'm so excited!

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That's exciting! I should know my surgery date within the next 6 weeks probably. Im thinking august but not for sure yet.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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