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Returning to old habits



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So I have my final set of doctors appts today before all my paperwork gets submitted for insurance approval. An old habit of mine was to self-sabotage when loosing weight for purely psychological reasons. I have been in therapy for the last year to manage this. But here I am, procrastinating getting ready for these appointments, and finding reasons not to drive to Nashville.

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You are facing the hardest part of this process... the mind. Hope you can get your head under control... but you (we) have a continuing battle!!!

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You are facing the hardest part of this process... the mind. Hope you can get your head under control... but you (we) have a continuing battle!!!

I just think my anxiety is getting the best of me. My emotions are all over the place today.

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Half of the battle is seeing the enemy. You know who he is and how he works.

Courage has brought you this far. You have what you need within you. Do what your logical mind says. Let changeable emotion roll on by.

Win.

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I'd say you haven't returned to the old habit yet. You're just recognizing the old habit now, which maybe you didn't earlier? If that's the case, I'd change your post title to. "I have made great progress!" :)

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Quick update...made it to the hospital for both my appointments. In the cafeteria now waiting for my last appointment for the day. Only wish....is that the Starbucks was still open. Might go for a walk to burn off this nervous energy before my last appointment.

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I agree that you're not returning to old habits, but more like afraid to leave you're old habits so you don't face it. We've all been there and once you're over one hurdle you're off to face another, but with accomplishment.

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I don't think you're returning to old habits, you're just more acutely aware of them now. That's a major stepping point in making sure you DON'T return to them - being able to recognize them, and you made it to the hospital so you overcame the temptation to return to those habits. This was a victory for you and a huge step in the right direction! Best of luck!!

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Could it be fear? I can't speak for earlier bouts of self-sabotage, but this is a pretty big decision for a pretty big surgery. I'm frightened and I haven't even had my first consult yet!

BTW, I'll be getting mine done in Nashville :)

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Could it be fear? I can't speak for earlier bouts of self-sabotage' date=' but this is a pretty big decision for a pretty big surgery. I'm frightened and I haven't even had my first consult yet!

BTW, I'll be getting mine done in Nashville :)[/quote']

I don't think it's fear. It's my normal pattern so it was pretty easy to recognize. Where in Nashville are you doing surgery? I am going through St Thomas at Midtown.

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Centennial, I work at the company

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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