vent

[SuzyB 182]

I am less than a month from my surgery date. Still waiting for approval, but I know the insurance company has it in process. I will know within the next 2 weeks. I have been low carb high Protein for the last 4 weeks or so and doing pretty well. Down about 10lbs. I have hit a stall which I knew I would and annoyed by it but know it is part of the process.

My husband is driving me nuts though. He is reluctantly accepting I am having surgery though he would prefer I not. He needs to lose weight too, and has started doing his own methods. His methods are not eating much of anything. He eats a small amount for Breakfast and then claims he skips lunch and rarely eats dinner. He is ultra grouchy and continually whining about it. I have tried to explain that starving himself is not healthy and not condusive to long term weight loss. It is getting hard to deal with his grouchiness and he will not even entertain the idea he could be wrong about his methods. He comments about how food is the enemy now for us all. I have shown him sample meal plans that I will be eating and what he and the kids can eat, I try to explain the first 6-8 weeks will be the meals with the most major differences, but after that I will be eating smaller portions of the right foods. I do not think he will accept that until he sees that happen. God forbid I have any major complications.

[Pookeyism 1,143]

Just so I understand a bit more, if you don't mind me prying a bit...

Does he encourage you right now, as you are eating healthier? Does he try to sabotage your eating?

Does he reduce or omit activities you used to to together, or alone, or with the kids, etc...in some way justifying the diet (either his or yours) as a reason to go do?

Has he ever dieted before and if so is this how he acted when he did?

[SuzyB 182]

He doesn't encourage nor discourage. He knows I need to get healthier, but feels wls is a drastic measure which I agree with but I need a drastic measure. He does refuse to eat fish but I always make sure there is a leftover for him when I serve it. In the past when I have tried to diet, he can be discouraging grumbling at meals about rabbit food and not enough. That hasn't happened this time yet.

We still do things together. Go for walks, watch a movie together. We havent gone out to eat much as usual as a family. . We rarely get date nights. That has has not changed. With 4 kids and football starting, that is how it is.

I guess this method of dieting is typical for him. I pointed out to him that all diets have stalls and there will be ups and downs he doesnt want to hear this. I know he can get very jealous when I loose weight and he doesn't. I do not even talk to him about what I may have loss on any given week. I have learned that the hard way.

[TwinsMama 483]

It's about being healthy. Most of us fear what we don't know/understand. I understand he may be nervous and a tad jealous but if you need this surgery to make the lasting changes that will keep you here for your kids, you know what you need to do.

It can be hard when a partner doesn't "get It' but you'll have support here. I'm rooting for you to keep going and hopefully once you start losing, he will get on board. Hugs to you!!