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I miss eating-I'm depressed



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Hi everyone,

I had my first fill (3cc) on Thursday and thankfully so far I have restriction. Does anyone at some point after fills get depressed? I feel like I really miss being able to eat (like I used to.) It's so hard realizing that food was the center of my life and I guess I feel like I've lost my best friend. I'm sooo happy I have my band but I have to learn how to deal with it. If you have any suggestions I'd love to hear them. Thanks in advance.

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hey--i miss eating--and i haven't gotten banded yet. how's that for pathetic? i FEEL YOUR PAIN! but look at the weight you've lost--that must feel REALLY GOOD. i'm waiting to lose 20 lbs. i would LOVE to lose 20 lbs. even if feel sad about not stuffing my face anymore--i am looking forward to the benefits of feeling better--and, vanity speaks--looking better!

can you try to distract yourself? reading, tv, shopping? anything?? do you have any hobbies you can immerse yourself in? i find knitting is good--certainly can't eat while you're knitting! go to michael's or another craft store--look around for something to do to amuse yourself!!

best wishes,

girlin

nyc

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I completely felt the same as you after surgery. I felt as if I had lost my best friend, but really it was my worst enemy just as Jack said. I kept myself busy and took up Sodoku. Now it's been over a year and I am so glad that I can fit into smaller clothes that it makes me feel great. Hang in there and keep posting.

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Does anyone at some point after fills get depressed? I feel like I really miss being able to eat (like I used to.) It's so hard realizing that food was the center of my life and I guess I feel like I've lost my best friend.

Now that you've recognized your problem, you need to work hard to find solutions for it. If you can, try to find a counselor who deals with food issues. If that's not an option, then you need to find coping strategies for dealing with the depression AND your dependency on food. I think that it's particularly difficult in the beginning because, even though you're losing weight, you don't yet have the major weight losses to boost your morale, mood, and self-image.

In a nutshell, you need to find another "center for your life." As you lose weight, many of the opportunities that you didn't try because of your weight will become available to you. Find a new hobby or new passion. Think about what YOU want to do with the rest of your life as a new, skinnier self. Start working toward that goal. Start exercising. Not only does it take time, but it's a mood booster, it helps you to lose weight, and you can't eat while doing it. ;)

It DOES get better. Use POSITIVE self-talk, remind yourself that food is NOT a friend, it's not emotional, it should only be nutrition.

Cindy

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I know the feeling.....and the feeling is temporary...in reality, you've lost your worst enemy....

COURAGE!!! ACTION!!! NOW!!!!

Jack, whever I need a kick in the ass, you provide it - your wit and courage coupled with the temerity to say it like it is really helps. Thanks for posting and keeping it real...to use all those worn out cliches...lol

Sue

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I think everyone knows the feeling I mean I haven't been banded yet and I'm already starting to mourn the food, most people do. Look at how many threads there are of people who go out and pig out before surgery, I mean thats like getting one last kiss from a girl your never going to see again lol.

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I, too, never really realized how many of my thoughts were centered around food. Now, I have tried to fill that void with other things. I spend way too much time here reading the board. (Hey guys, write more stuff!)

I also read, take bath, do puzzles, clean house (yuck), anything to keep busy.

Eventually, you will find your new love. And fill that void.

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I cried like a baby before my surgery. I felt like I completely let myself down. My so called best friend ie. food had become my worst enemy. I am so happy I am banded now. I feel so much better.

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I can truly speak to the temporariness.... Im only 3 months out and food is NOT my friend. The pain it causes if I rush, dont chew well and the whole I cant do that in public- Its a hassle to eat! I now find that the amount, speed and glutinous habits of others amuse and nauseate me.

Learn to play a musical instrument, learn to make clay or ceramics, paint, clean house, sew, read, making jewelry, knit blankets or clothes for your local neonatal icu- they need them, walking, get out and work in the yard (its amazing how many people you meet), volunteer for elderly or go hold babies in the nurseries, all the things I associated with my "older" relatives. Things that I now bet they did during the depression years since they did not have the abundance of food we now have.

I USED to miss food- I enjoy getting out, actually smelling starbucks since I dont like coffee I have tried Chai latte and love it. I like to take a magazine and people watch, while drinking a bottle of Water or tea.

You will loose your affection to food, maybe the relationship just changes.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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