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I'm 3 weeks post-op and took the plunge a couple of weeks ago and started therapy. I chose someone who deals with disordered eating. The thing is, I don't really feel like I "click" with her. It bothers me that she doesn't seem to remember things I've told her.

Because I've never done this before, I'm wondering if this is normal. Any input is greatly appreciated.

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I used to click just fine with my therapist because she kept track of everything we talked about. Find someone you feel confident with, also don't be afraid to bring this up in therapy. Best of luck!

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Osa is 100% right. It's hard to be committed to the process when you are feeling let down or disappointed in the therapist.

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You should keep 'shopping' until you find a therapist you click with. Someone who is at least respectful enough to keep notes and review them before you meet - no one has a perfect memory, but the big stuff should be there. Maybe the therapist won't remember the names of people in your family initially (for example), but he/she should certainly remember the plot line!

Finding that right person will make all the difference in the world.

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Definitely find someone that you have confidence in - it's hard enough to figure out what triggers overeating - and if you're not with the right therapist, progress won't happen

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Thank you, everyone! She takes copious notes and I was thinking she should read them over before I come in (all patients, actually).

I'm going to look around.

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I made a decision to start therapy also. I am only 2 wks out - so, I am going to wait until I feel just a bit better physically. But, then I think handling the mental is going to make this journey so much more worthwhile. I appauld you for taking the step!

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Get rid of any therapist you don't click with. I wasted almost 6 months on a crappy therapist, and regret it. Huge waste of money. Taking notes doesn't equal helping you out!

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I'm 3 weeks post-op and took the plunge a couple of weeks ago and started therapy. I chose someone who deals with disordered eating. The thing is' date=' I don't really feel like I "click" with her. It bothers me that she doesn't seem to remember things I've told her.

Because I've never done this before, I'm wondering if this is normal. Any input is greatly appreciated.[/quote']

Well 1st... Yay and congrats!! Therapy is awesome!! I'm also a therapist intern so I'm a bit biased! lol

I'm sorry your not clicking with yours- give it a few sessions to see if u have a change of heart-- also - if u do not-- change them! No harm in it... U need to be comfortable and your self-

Also- make sure your not 'not clicking' if the Only reason would be that they are 'pushing your buttons or challenging u-- therapy should make u a bit uncomfortable as u u are changing and growing.

Good luck Hun and dont give up - weekly is recommended and ud u need to find another therapist u can go to edrefferal . Com and fund one!!!

:)

Sent from my iPhone using VST

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I really appreciate everyone's input and support. I called another therapist (someone a friend uses and who I've met in a non-therapy setting) and will be seeing him next week. Also called the original therapist to let her know I would not be seeing her anymore. When she asked me why I said that I didn't feel a connection and the fact that she didn't remember things I had said, even though she took notes, made me feel like she didn't value me.

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I'm a therapist, and in my opinion it's really important to 'click' with your clinician. However, sometimes people think they don't click and it ends up that their clinician is just pushing them to address difficult issues. If your therapist doesn't seem to be able to keep track of your stories, history and general information, then maybe it's best to find someone else. You have to be willing to do the work, but the work is more likely to get done if you have the right clinician supporting and challenging you.

Good luck.

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That reminds me of my nutritionist whom I saw for six months and every month I step into her office, she would ask me if this is my first time being here. Got to a point that she even told me her deep personal story and I figured that we are now cool cos there is no way that I will share such a story with someone and not even recall their faces. Guess what, she still didn't remember me. She had the nerve to come to my room after surgery, ask me if i saw her for 6months or another nutritionist, then she told me that I should make an appointment to see her after seeing my surgeon for 2 weeks post-op. I was in too much pain to tell her how I felt but I never and will never see her again.

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I really appreciate everyone's input and support. I called another therapist (someone a friend uses and who I've met in a non-therapy setting) and will be seeing him next week. Also called the original therapist to let her know I would not be seeing her anymore. When she asked me why I said that I didn't feel a connection and the fact that she didn't remember things I had said, even though she took notes, made me feel like she didn't value me.

I think that was a really healthy way to handle this! As someone who has spent a lot of time in younger years in therapy, I agree with the previous advice you've gotten...there's no point in continuing to see someone you don't click with.

In order for you to make progress and allow yourself to be challenged, you've got to have some connection and rapport with your therapist.

~Kat

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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