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Basically I want to hear from the single sleevers and how You feel dating post sleeve. Do you feel more confident? Do you feel like you have attention from people that possibly would have not noticed you before?

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I am a single sleever!!! I am still pre op, I have lost weight on my own 15-20 lbs. And I get a lot of attention, kinda weird at first lol but I am starting to get used to it. My confidence is sky high already but I am still scared to date. I think the same fears that were their before are still here. Might take a bit longer to get over it, or I think I am becoming just pickier!

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You know what's funny. I went from a size 24 to a size 8/10 and I get more attention and more date requests, but I have no desire to date and be in a relationship. I know my life has changed in a lot of ways, but I wasn't expecting this at all. Maybe it will change and maybe it won't. But right now I am completely satisfied and happy which is all that matters.

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You know what's funny. I went from a size 24 to a size 8/10 and I get more attention and more date requests' date=' but I have no desire to date and be in a relationship. I know my life has changed in a lot of ways, but I wasn't expecting this at all. Maybe it will change and maybe it won't. But right now I am completely satisfied and happy which is all that matters. [/quote']

Why no desire? God dying to be 8/10!

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You know what's funny. I went from a size 24 to a size 8/10 and I get more attention and more date requests' date=' but I have no desire to date and be in a relationship. I know my life has changed in a lot of ways, but I wasn't expecting this at all. Maybe it will change and maybe it won't. But right now I am completely satisfied and happy which is all that matters. [/quote']

Can I ask where you started and how much you've lost? I'm a 24 started at 310 and now 272 (one week post op-not sure what size now cause I'm rocking the sweats until real pants don't hurt) and an 8/10 seems like a lovely far away dream.

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I think my desire changed when I started becoming more in tune with me and body. I started doing yoga and putting a lot of energy into that instead of trying to find a man. I started out at 275 and was a size 24. I am 5'7 in height. Hope this helps. Keep looking up!

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I got out of a terrible relationship 7 months ago or so and I am ready to date in a sense. Although I don't plan on dating until I lose at least 50 more pounds. It is a confidence thing for me. Before I got into my last relationship I was a size 6 to 8. I am a 18 to 16 right now. I have never tried dating while over weight. It's not that I don't think I'm attractive, I'm just not comfortable and I believe it will show. Not being confident tends to attract the scumbag men. So I will wait.

highest weight = 228 DOS = 219 CW = 201 DOS was May 7th 2013

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I got out of a terrible relationship 7 months ago or so and I am ready to date in a sense. Although I don't plan on dating until I lose at least 50 more pounds. It is a confidence thing for me. Before I got into my last relationship I was a size 6 to 8. I am a 18 to 16 right now. I have never tried dating while over weight. It's not that I don't think I'm attractive' date=' I'm just not comfortable and I believe it will show. Not being confident tends to attract the scumbag men. So I will wait.

highest weight = 228 DOS = 219 CW = 201 DOS was May 7th 2013[/quote']

Exactly. I think hating myself has put me into horrible situations with bad men. I really hope that the outcome of all of this is me - liking myself more

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Exactly. I think hating myself has put me into horrible situations with bad men. I really hope that the outcome of all of this is me - liking myself more

This is what made me stay with a horrible "sociopath next door" type of man for wayyyy longer than I should have. I realized 2 years in that he was a piece of crap (he hid it well at first) but I stayed. partially because I was overweight and didnt want to be on the dating scene again. I wasted too many years and just got bigger and bigger. Leaving him was a great decision. I will never ever put up with shady, lying, manipulative, weirdo men again lol.

Liking and loving yourself makes a world of difference. this weight loss journey has fueled me to address my other issues and seek assistance in other areas of my life where necessary so that I can go back to being the confident no nonsense woman I was in my 20s.

Good luck to you.

highest weight = 228 DOS = 219 CW = 201 DOS was May 7th 2013

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I am a single sleever as well and I've always gotten attention. I think I am kind of used to it, and I am so thankful that I am getting sleeved a little older. I was quite slim until age 20, then gradually gained massive weight over 10 years. I was also married. The decision to lose weight was a catalyst for my divorce, unfortunately. I think moving my 6'/400lb mother in law in was a mistake for my health and my marriage.

I am kind of scared of the attention that I will get when I am a regular size again (regular being 18 and under). I've always gotten attention but that constant unrelenting attention that I got as a younger person or that I see my small friends have to go through scares the heck out of me.

I do not date for religious reasons but it's very uncomfortable when even the nurses in the hospital or the hospital valet people are like "Don't get pregnant." and "You're going to have to beat men off with a stick." Like, I don't even want to think about that! LOL. Even my doctor was pressuring me about birth control. I kept telling them "I won't be doing any of that until I get remarried". Such awkward conversations OMG.

I just got sleeved Thursday and the few people I let know are already saying that I am going to be mean or going to be a 'B' word when I get skinny. I lost about 120lbs before my surgery and people are saying I have changed, that I am different, etc. Most of these people were not in my life though when I weighed 135lbs LOL so they don't know I have always just been the same 'me'.

I would LOVE to hear what other people have experienced about this. Also, how do you deal with the paranoia of "Would they have liked me fat? What happens when they find out I had WLS? Would they leave me if they found out I used to be almost 500lbs?"

I plan to get married again ONE DAY, God willing but I'm so scared because I know attractiveness and physical fitness are huge factors that are considered when men look for wives.

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I'm single now and get a lot of attention after 116lb loss but I have no desire to date:) I'm enjoying me!

Sent from my iPhone using VST

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      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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