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The beloved "Food Funeral".

LipstickLady

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LipstickLady    25,682

LipstickLady
Posted

I have planned mine out many times over the last few weeks and with surgery coming up three weeks from tomorrow and the pre-op liquid diet starting two weeks from tomorrow, I've finally decided what I am going to do.

I'm not having one. Why? Because I know that eventually (within 6 months or so!), I will be able to eat anything I want, I will just do so in moderation. (Imagine that concept!) I don't want to mourn the loss of any food, because it's not going away, I am just going to be limited in quantity. I have had more food in my 41 years than I should have consumed in a lifetime and I really see no need to mourn something that isn't dead and more importantly, has done nothing but made me unhealthy because I've allowed it to take control of me.

I want to be the one to make the decision to stop eating so much and to start being healthy, I do not want my surgeon to decide for me. For many people, once they go under, the decision is being made for them by the surgeon who is doing the cutting. Because they are no longer able to eat in mass quantity, they don't. Up until yesterday, that was going to be me. Yes, I've been doing one shake a day and high protein/low carb/under 1000cal for the last week and have lost 10.8 pounds to show for it. In the back of my mind, though, I was looking forward to having a smorgasbord of good stuff a few days before my diet started. I've looked at a million pins on Pinterest and gotten sad that I will never eat that or make that. I've been hyper-aware of all the new restaurants that are opening in my area, studying the menus, trying to figure out what I can have ONE LAST TIME. How ridiculous!

I don't want my surgeon to steal MY power, I want it to be MY decision. I decided Wednesday of last week that I would start prepping myself for the pre-op diet and yesterday I decided to stick to it right up till my surgery date. I decided to cut back on my favorite - Coke Zero - and have only one every few days. No more. I've not had one since Friday and I've lived!

Yesterday I completed all my pre-op blood work, xrays, tests, doctor visits, and signed off on all the papers. I also did all the pre-registration. The surgeon asked me if I was ready to make all the changes starting post-op that were necessary for my success and that really hit me. I told him I was not. I was ready to start right now.

I decided that I am in control of my body NOW because God knows I will not be in control of it for the weeks immediately following my procedure because at that point, I will be forced to do it.

I am the boss of me. Starting TODAY. Good Lord, I think it finally clicked and I cannot wait to start my new life. Oh, wait. I already did.

**EDIT TO ADD. I have no idea why this post is shaded or sized this way. HA! I made it bigger so it's readable.WEIRD!!!**

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JeffNNJ    111

JeffNNJ
Posted

All very noble but since I wasn't given a pre op diet, I ate like a complete frigging maniac. There was less than 3 weeks between my initial consultation and my surgery during which I gained 10 lbs. Not the healthiest choice but it certainly was memorable.

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LipstickLady    25,682

LipstickLady
Posted

Not trying to be noble at all. I was just verbally vomiting all the thoughts and feeling that are rushing through me right now. :) I have no doubt I will have weak moments and pangs of regret, but I really regret what I've done to myself over the years MORE.

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BayouGal85    16

BayouGal85
Posted

I personally ate my bootie off!!!! For me it was the only time I could honestly guilt free eat what I wanted and how much I wanted. I now have the frame of mind that Humm ill eat it again some day so it's no big deal. Also my last and final binge reminded me of how much I could and would eat on a normal basis. It was my final confirmation that this was my only option to save my life.

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BayouGal85    16

BayouGal85
Posted

I was only able to because I knew I was going to have the surgery and I would then be able to control my urges

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AussieLady    521

AussieLady
Posted

I think you both really need to talk to a professional before you have this surgery. You both seem to really have the wrong perception about what you are about to do.

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BayouGal85    16

BayouGal85
Posted

Absolutely, you know your body the best.

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newat52    1,613

newat52
Posted

First of all~ THANK YOU for the larger font, it makes it much easier for us in the over 50 crowd! :)

Second~ I know you were not trying to be noble, I felt exactly the same way and I knew this was going to be different than any other of the million and ten diets I had done before so I didn't want make the same mistakes as a million and ten time previously if that makes sense.

The only thing I had a "one last" of is my beloved frozen margarita as I had decided to give those up forever. Probably one of the best things I could do for my health considering a small one weighs in at over 600 calories and more processed sugar than you can shake a stick at.

I am 7 weeks out today and life is returning to normal. I am off all dietary restrictions and while the hard work really starts now it's been good. I want to make great choices but I also want to have a normal life. I am introducing new foods every day, slowly to see what works. I'm in no hurry because I know that within a few months there won't be anything I can't have, I will just have way less and I know I will be just as happy.

I applaud you on your decision to take control. That was exactly how I needed to look at it. Someone in another thread about long term success. My reply was "my long term success is up to me, and me alone." I believe that to be true. I have a powerful tool, not a magic wand.

Best of luck to you. You will do great!

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BayouGal85    16

BayouGal85
Posted

Aussie I was sleeved on 3-19-13 & couldn't be happier with my decision

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nsquared    232

nsquared
Posted

Good for you LipstickLady! I was sleeved in February and I did not have a food funeral either. It was not a deliberate decision, I just didn't feel the need for one and I have never regretted that.

Best of luck to you during pre-op diet, surgery and beyond. I am sure you will do great with your new tool

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Go To Topic Listing Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums

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    • Doughgurl

      Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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