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Im an emotional disaster :(



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Wasn't sure where to post this, so I figured here was ok...

I had a total melt down today at dinner with my family. I cried myself to sleep 2 nights ago. WHAT IS GOING ON?? I feel overwhelmed and exhausted and broken. I'm beyond estatic that I was blessed with the sleeve, but I am feeling so lost. I miss being able to eat with them. It angers me that we go to dinner, I get food that I think I can eat, my sleeve won't tolerate it and I just wasted 8-10 dollars. I told my husband that from now on I will not be eat at restaurants. I will go and enjoy their company, but I will eat at home where I know I'm getting something I can tolerate.

The crazy part is I have done GREAT until now. Why suddenly am I on this emotional roller coaster....

Ok, I vented and that's what I needed to do. Time for the big girl panties (that are shrinking in size :))

Sleeve Date: March 28, 2013 Weight on surgery date: 281 First Goal 50lbs: July 13, 2013 (231)

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I'm sorry I'm not much "been there" help but I can say that from what I've heard, you are experiencing something completely normal. I think it is really wrenching on your body to have a surgery and you are having to deal with the after affects of having the surgery. I think the crying and being upset that you can't eat with your family is really quite normal. It's hard when you want to be a part of their lives like you used to but your body rejects it. Don't worry about wasting money, take the rest of the food home, someone will eat it. You can eat dinner with your family, you just have to switch it around a little until it works for you. Take a little extra time right now to take care of yourself. Make sure you aren't trying to rush yourself into eating foods that might not work out for you. Fret not, You will be all right.

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ChristieK, I have been hearing a lot lately about new sleevers on a emotional rollercoaster. I am wondering if it is from the absence of the Ghrelin hormone. I am very concerned about it because I am already on an emotional roller coaster due to being in the process of a divorce and I am hormonal because of my age. I would love to hear from others about how long this lasts. This is an important topic. I hope all is well with you, please keep us updated. From what I hear, as time goes on you will be able to tolerate food more and that will help. Good luck with your journey, we are all pulling for you!!

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Are you trying to eat "heavy" meals out? I eat out frequently with family & friends & have no problem if I order baked/grilled chicken for example. I do get nauseous if I try & eat something "heavy" like Mexican food, or chicken Alfredo. Haven't gotten physically ill...but it made me not feel good & I learned my lesson.

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I feel your pain and agony. One of the most important things I have taken away from this journey is that my relationship with food has changed drastically. The sleeve is the tool that provided me the ability to stand back and look at food from a different perspective. This can be an emotional process, more so for some than others, depending on what your psychological tie to food is/was. In my case, the first week after surgery was spent watching Food Network almost exclusively. Friends and families commented that they couldn't believe I could watch that knowing that I was on liquid/soft foods. I came to realize that this was my "mourning" process, similar to looking at photos or videos of a loved one that is no longer with us. You are still early out on your surgery. Take a deep breath and relax. As you go through the physical healing process and eat in a more mindful manner, you will learn the things that you can eat and those things you should avoid. At this stage, it is best to incorporate foods into your diet at home first, that way you know what will work and avoid spending unnecessarily or, worse, getting sick in public. Although I eat more slowly now than I did before being sleeved, the quantities I eat are much less than those of my dining partners (I don't have appetizers or desserts), I have learned to make the dining experience more about the company than about the food, you will get there, too. Good luck & congratulations on making a healthy commitment to yourself!

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I eat off of everyone's plate. All are willing to share a little something. I just did that the other night for a birthday. I ordered nothing and tasted all kinds of different foods. We eat so little that it is ludicrous to order a big meal for us and I am 5 months out.

As far as the crying goes, you recently went thru a major operation and your hormones are all over the place. Give it a couple more weeks and this sadness will be but a distant memory.

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I eat off of everyone's plate. All are willing to share a little something. I just did that the other night for a birthday. I ordered nothing and tasted all kinds of different foods. We eat so little that it is ludicrous to order a big meal.

That is brilliant! I will have to try that after I get sleeved

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Wasn't sure where to post this' date=' so I figured here was ok...

I had a total melt down today at dinner with my family. I cried myself to sleep 2 nights ago. WHAT IS GOING ON?? I feel overwhelmed and exhausted and broken. I'm beyond estatic that I was blessed with the sleeve, but I am feeling so lost. I miss being able to eat with them. It angers me that we go to dinner, I get food that I think I can eat, my sleeve won't tolerate it and I just wasted 8-10 dollars. I told my husband that from now on I will not be eat at restaurants. I will go and enjoy their company, but I will eat at home where I know I'm getting something I can tolerate.

The crazy part is I have done GREAT until now. Why suddenly am I on this emotional roller coaster....

Ok, I vented and that's what I needed to do. Time for the big girl panties (that are shrinking in size :))

Sleeve Date: March 28, 2013 Weight on surgery date: 281 First Goal 50lbs: July 13, 2013 (231)[/quote']

Awe don't feel bad I was sleeved April 3rd & had a couple days like that but not cause I couldn't eat with my FAM just 4 no reason at all and feeling like what did I do 2 myself people keep telling me it will past soon but reading or story I'm confused now I hope that u can get through this the both of us goodluck

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I eat off of everyone's plate. All are willing to share a little something. I just did that the other night for a birthday. I ordered nothing and tasted all kinds of different foods. We eat so little that it is ludicrous to order a big meal for us and I am 5 months out.

As far as the crying goes' date=' you recently went thru a major operation and your hormones are all over the place. Give it a couple more weeks and this sadness will be but a distant memory.[/quote']

I hope so cause sometimes I feel the same way I wonder how long does that feeling last

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I feel your pain and agony. One of the most important things I have taken away from this journey is that my relationship with food has changed drastically. The sleeve is the tool that provided me the ability to stand back and look at food from a different perspective. This can be an emotional process' date=' more so for some than others, depending on what your psychological tie to food is/was. In my case, the first week after surgery was spent watching Food Network almost exclusively. Friends and families commented that they couldn't believe I could watch that knowing that I was on liquid/soft foods. I came to realize that this was my "mourning" process, similar to looking at photos or videos of a loved one that is no longer with us. You are still early out on your surgery. Take a deep breath and relax. As you go through the physical healing process and eat in a more mindful manner, you will learn the things that you can eat and those things you should avoid. At this stage, it is best to incorporate foods into your diet at home first, that way you know what will work and avoid spending unnecessarily or, worse, getting sick in public. Although I eat more slowly now than I did before being sleeved, the quantities I eat are much less than those of my dining partners (I don't have appetizers or desserts), I have learned to make the dining experience more about the company than about the food, you will get there, too. Good luck & congratulations on making a healthy commitment to yourself![/quote']

I know that wasn't 4 me but I needed 2 hear it thanks

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I was sleeved on march 12 and I know what you are going through. Have felt the same way. I think it's more of a grieving process than we thought it would be. Everything that we do revolves around food. We go out to eat at least 2-3 times a week. I had to remember its not all about the food but the company we are with and the socialization of going out to eat. I also don't always order a meal and share with my family and friends. Of course if they are not eating something I can tolerate or like I just get whatever I want and bring it home for later meals... Eat slow and listen to your body when it is full, enjoy the people your with. You will be fine, it's a lifestyle change that is not easy hit you will be successful!!!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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