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Second thoughts about surgery ..



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So here's what's going on , I'm only 15 and I have my surgery date set for may 13th everything got approved and all and now I'm just thinking what if I can do this on my own ? How hard could it be ? I need help on what to do !

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Hi Nate I can't tell you what to do... But I will say each one of us had moments of thinking the same thing!

I can tell you I can lose weight without surgery, I've done it many times in my adult life.

But I still needed to do this because after the diet I would go right back to where I was within a few months.

This is a major ( and sometimes not easy) change.

But I am glad to be doing it and it is worth the small sacrifices I have to make.

I will support you no matter what your decision is. :)

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I feel ya Nate. At 15 I probably was pretty much in your shoes. I didn't have surgery as an option, so I did it the old fashioned way. I backed off my mom's table and dropped the junk food and got my ass in gear. I managed to drop some significant pounds between my Jr. and Sr. year in high school. It made a world of difference in my life, socially, physically and so on. I was able to keep the weight off for a certain number of years, but like a lot of us, it always came back. I thought a lot about your question and I wonder at 15 what I would have done if surgery would have been available. Knowing what I know now about eating and all the things that go on inside of us, I probably wouldn't do it. I might have given myself a year and just tried a few simple things like tracking what I ate (like with myfitnesspal), changing how I ate and getting some real exercise too. I don't mean just walking around, but something that puts out some real sweat. That's what I did, but I didn't stick with it long enough to push the old habits out of the way. Along the way I found some more habits that made trying to lose the weight a lot harder too.

This surgery and all that goes with it, is pretty complex. Yep of course you'll lose the weight, but it really takes a ton of work. That's something that I am not sure a lot of people are ready for nor can they accept the fact this it is a very permanent solution. At 15 for me, permanent lasted til next weekend. You seem like a pretty sharp guy so I know that what ever you decide it is going to be the right thing for you. If you feel like this is your very best choice and are willing to except that it is not reversible and not refundable, then I think you'll do fine. Otherwise, think hard about what you might be able to accomplish without the surgery. Good luck with this dude, what ever you decide, let us know, we are here for you!

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I started a lifetime of dieting at about age 13. Seems like I was on some kind of diet more often than not. I just knew I should be able to do this on my own. YES I lost some weight on most of those diets, but never came close to a normal weight. Weight issues and low self esteem put a major damper on my life. I had no social life, never attended school functions, never danced, and never felt good enough. Finally in 1983, at age 59, and more than 300 pounds, I began looking into bariatric surgery. I had started the process when my dad became ill and died. I then proceeded to gain an additional 70 pounds, weighing 374. In 2011, I started seeing a therapist to help me deal with my dad's death and with my food/eating issues. That is the single most important step that helped me not only make a decision about the surgery, but also prepared me to be successful with the surgery. I suggest you find a therapist who specializes in helping people with food/eating/obesity and self esteem issues. My therapist continues to help me dealing with the stresses, diffulties and joys of life after gastric sleeve surgery. I can't advise you whether or not to have the surgery but I truly believe that without some therapy/counseling, successful weightloss will be a very difficult process. I sort of threw my life away, but can finally say at the age of 63, I got this weight thing under control. I have lost 168 pounds in just under 11 months and am well on my way (30 - 50 pounds to go) to a healthy, normal weight for the rest of my life. You have your whole life ahead of you. I wish you enormous success, health and happiness whatever your decision.

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Thank you all so much the support is amazing .. I meet with my therapist tomorrow I am going to talk it out with her .. But more than likely I will continue with having surgery !! Thank you all for sharing ! I'd be lost without this group!

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My only concern with you being 15 and having the surgery, is that right now at your age, your hormones are going crazy. There are so many changes already going on with your body, that one huge change, like having surgery, may cause major depression. Definitely talk it out with your therapist and be open and honest.

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What do your parents think?

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This is definitely a hard decision for you. I'm 23 and even I have that big question in my mind mostly because I am so young. It's scary to think you're permanently altering yourself at such a young age.

That being said, I struggled with my weight since I was about 7 or 8. When I was your age, I really started dieting and exercising. I lost weight and was an average size throughout high school and was relatively happy.

Then it just slowly started packing back on, from 180lbs when I was 15/16 to the 240lbs I'm at now at 23. And my highest was 260 two years ago. Honestly, I haven't got the surgery yet. I'm schedule for next Monday so I still have those doubts in my head. But I've seen myself battle this thing forever and it never goes away. For me, anyways.

You know what, you definitely could lose the weight on your own. But the bigger issue is keeping it off. Mine started gaining back when I became independent from my parents, learned to drive, and could suddenly stop at mcdonalds whenever I wanted. I could eat out with friends all the time.

You definitely need to prepare yourself for this. It won't be easy, not for any of us. But from what I've read in hundreds and hundreds of forums by this point, is that the #1 regret for people is that they didn't do the sleeve earlier.

Good luck!

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What do your parents think?

My dad had gastric bypass and was sooo successful but he isn't a big fan of me having it , on the other hand me and my mom have been attending meetings with the bariatric team for over a year atleast once a month , therefore she knows a lot an she is there for me with whatever I decide and I'm having it at a children's hospital as well

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My dad had gastric bypass and was sooo successful but he isn't a big fan of me having it , on the other hand me and my mom have been attending meetings with the bariatric team for over a year atleast once a month , therefore she knows a lot an she is there for me with whatever I decide and I'm having it at a children's hospital as well

You sound like you've really thought this through. Your parents must be very proud of you. It sounds like they are supportive, which is great.

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You sound like you've really thought this through. Your parents must be very proud of you. It sounds like they are supportive' date=' which is great.[/quote']

Oh yes I have been thinking this through an doing TONS of research! What are your thoughts ??

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Hi Nate, truly a tough decision and one only you can make. I myself wish I had had that option at your age. Most of my life has been very unhappily spent on the diet roller coaster. You said you have a therapist and that everything has been approved so your health care professionals obviously think this is the best course for you. Surgery is scary, but take comfort in the fact that you are not alone! We are all here for you! Best wishes and keep us posted. HUGS to you!!

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Oh yes I have been thinking this through an doing TONS of research! What are your thoughts ??

I think it's a really personal decision, Nate. I am really glad that I had my surgery and wish that I had done it sooner. I am a medical writer/editor who has covered adolescent medicine, and I remember hearing a saying once about so many chronic conditions (type 2 diabetes, osteoporosis, high cholesterol) being "pediatric diseases with adult implications." So basically the sooner you start preventing these conditions in your lifetime, the longer, healthier your life could end up being. I think you probably could lose some of the weight on your own, but the question will be about keeping it off. Surgery could help you do that.

With that said, I wouldn't begin to recommend that you get it or not get it. I can tell that you are a smart young man and your parents sound supportive, so I'm confident you will come to a decision that is best for you. I would just go into it eyes wide open and choose your surgeon very carefully and follow the post-op instructions to a "t." Even if you do that, and I'm sure that you will, complications can happen. I think everyone should go into the surgery and know that is a possiblity--expect the best, but be prepared for the worst.

If you have the surgery, there may be times when you wish you could drink a beer with your buddies (when you are 21 of course) or that you wish you could eat junk food or take a date out for a 5-course dinner. I would just be prepared for those mental things, but to me, the trade-off is completely worth it.

Whatever you decide, I wish you the very best, Nate. You clearly have a bright future ahead of you. Please keep us posted.

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Nate I think it's great you are seeing a therapist beforehand. You sound like you are doing your research thoroughly as well. At the age of 39 almost 40 I have dieted a long long time. My first round at weight watchers I was 11. I've spent my whole life dieting. If this surgery would've been an option for me then I know I would've looked into it. It's your decision and it's a lot to think about. I think it's great to have it done young, then by the time you are older its just second nature to eat the way you have to with this surgery. On the other hand I agree with John, did you try limiting and tracking your calories? Increase your exercise? Only you can answer honestly and know all you have done to lose weight on your own. I think it is absolutely great that you are doing something about your weight now while you are so young, whether that be surgery or not! Good luck and know if you do go thru with it you will have great support on here!

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