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6wks Postop and obsessed sex



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So has anyone else had this happen? I'm 6 weeks postop, 51lbs down and halfway to goal. And for the last 4 days, all I can think about is sex. I could care less about food lately, just keep daydreaming about sex. Which is especially difficult since my husband deployed 2 weeks ago for a 9 month deployment.

I'm worried that my food addiction has transferred into the beginnings of what could be a sex addiction. (Wouldn't be the first time either. From 18-22 I was super skinny, and VERY sexually active. I was also addicted to shopping at the time) So I'm concerned that I'm going to turn to either sex or shopping and both would be detrimental to my marriage (we paid of all our debt, and our debt free since 2010). Anyone else have this happen post surgery?? Anyone have suggestions? Will it pass? Or will I just become more and more sexually frustrated the skinnier I get??!!! Thanks y'all!

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Preop pic-taken day before surgery

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Taken today 6 weeks postop

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Comparison

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There must be something far deeper and maybe even narcissistic then with my obsession. Because I'm not just obsessed with sex because I want to get off. Even more than that I am fantasizing about the physical touch aspect of it and actually being with someone. I'm sure it's all exacerbated by the hubs deploying. But it's still far more drive than I've had for the last few years. I feel like a teenage boy almost. Constantly thinking about it.

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LMAO....love it!

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I haven't had the surgery, but I don't know if it is so much related to the surgery. You said your husband deployed 2 weeks ago. Perhaps since you miss his companionship that is how you specifically are reacting to his absence. Then again, maybe you are finding yourself more attractive since you have dropped the weight. I know when I lost 40 pounds on my own I felt more confident and I felt I was more attractive to the opposite sex. Hell, I started finding myself to be attractive LOL

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A lot of people here have gone through the same thing. There are plenty of posts about craving sex.. I think part of it is that we are discovering ourselves again. And that means as a person and a sexual being. These are things that we hid behind our fat walls so to speak..

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Your photos are great... Congrats.... Just stay strong...and try to keep yourself busy... Most men are assholes and good one is hard to find. Since u found him already dont mess up.

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My husband is getting ready for our 4th deployment late Fall :( We've had 3-12 month long deployments and my sex drive always goes crazy as soon as he leaves. Vibrators are okay but like OP I love the touch and feel of the whole man and not just the penor part KWIM lol. Plus vibrators desensitize me and that sucks because once you have the real thing it maybe harder to orgasm. My husband went to the field today and wont be back until early February but we had sex last night, so I'm good for a while and ovulation was a couple of days ago and usually that makes me so frickin horny. Congrats on your weight loss :)

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OP is this your first deployment? I've been on this military wife roller coaster for a little over 9 yrs. I haven't dealt with any addictions so I can't relate to you on that level. Also in my wild days before I became married I would have no strings attached sex and I always felt empty afterwards. Alcohol makes me black out and it sucks when you're still up and moving around but yet you don't remember a damn thing. One night this older guy (15 yrs older than me) took advantage of me during one of my black outs and I've never been the same when it comes to randomly hooking up with people. I have zero desire to be with anyone but my husband. When it comes to intercourse I need the man to actually love me and care about my needs and all that other mushy stuff and that's not something you can get from a one night stand. I'm glad I had my wild moments but now I don't even find it tempting at all. I burn off a lot of my energy through exercise, oh and I have 3 kiddos who kick my butt every day lol

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I haven't had the surgery' date=' but I don't know if it is so much related to the surgery. You said your husband deployed 2 weeks ago. Perhaps since you miss his companionship that is how you specifically are reacting to his absence. Then again, maybe you are finding yourself more attractive since you have dropped the weight. I know when I lost 40 pounds on my own I felt more confident and I felt I was more attractive to the opposite sex. Hell, I started finding myself to be attractive LOL[/quote']

I'm sure that's part of it. Cuz you're absolutely right. I feel like myself again for the first time in 4 years. And myself is damn sexy ;)

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Invisible text? I have no idea. Sorry :-/ And we've been married 7 1/2 years and this is our third deployment. First one with the kids (2yo and 8mo). I just got a call from him and told him about this. Asked him to start sending me naughty emails so that I have something to turn to when I can't talk to him and I'm sex craved. He is an awesome man, and father and I won't screw it up. I would never physically cheat, but chatting and entertaining the idea online is very tempting. :-/

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Please, please make an appointment with a counselor to work out some of these feelings. You owe that to yourself and your husband who is deployed in service of our country. You have to know that guys worry about leaving their women at home when they leave. Many women step out on their deployed husbands and marriages fall apart. As a military wife, please don't burden your husband with your new sexual obsessions as that may be a dangerous distraction for him.

Sorry to sound like a lecture, but I've seen too much of this and it just breaks my heart.

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Invisible text? I have no idea. Sorry :-/ And we've been married 7 1/2 years and this is our third deployment. First one with the kids (2yo and 8mo). I just got a call from him and told him about this. Asked him to start sending me naughty emails so that I have something to turn to when I can't talk to him and I'm sex craved. He is an awesome man, and father and I won't screw it up. I would never physically cheat, but chatting and entertaining the idea online is very tempting. :-/

For some reason on my laptop I can't see your text or what you've typed and it looks like a blank space until I highlight it *shrugs* lol. Hopefully the naughty emails will work but just don't act on your feelings of wanting sex or to feel the embrace of a man. Stay strong :)

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I absolutely agree with Blue Star Mom!!!!!! It might seem like fun & games right now ,and innocent thoughts. Be careful... Not to dance with the devil!!! Get professional help... crossover addictions are very very common after surgery!

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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