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Dissappointed by surgeon's goal



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I had my consult yesterday and was deflated by my surgeon's goal. I weight 242 and am hoping to get down to a normal BMI of 130-135. So I want to lose about 110 lbs. At my consult yesterday my surgeon's goal for me is 160-170. I am dissappointed. Is he saying I won't be successful? I'm 5' 3 1/2" (yes we shorties count the 1/2) at 160-170 I would still be overweight/obese. I worry now that if I get to 160, I won't be able to go any lower. Granted I haven't been 160 since I was a teen but still- I want to be skinny!

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My thought is that it is a number that the surgeon sees as a passable goal worthy as success in doing it, the rest is up to you really, I can't see that as defining all you do after surgery and all you can lose when the choices for success are yours not his alone.

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I am 5'4 1/2 and started at 240. I was sleeved on 8/23/12 and I am currently at 179. I definitely do not see my weight loss stopping at 160-170. I want to lose 100 lbs and get down to 140 at least. I only have 39 lbs to go and I feel like it is definitely an attainable goal. I love my sleeve!

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There is nothing stopping you from getting to your own goal. Your doctor is always going to have different expectations than you. If you have you mind set on a certain weight, just do it. I would like to make it down to 119 pounds. My doctor has a goal of 165 for me. Thats ok. Will I be happy when I make it to 165? You bet your behind I will. Why 119? I don't know, just sounds nice.

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Goals were never mentioned at any of my doc visits. I put down on preliminary paperwork that I wanted to lose 90 pounds since that is what I have gained since 1987. I just wanted to get back to the weight I was happiest at. So, really, I consider my goal to be very reasonable, since I gained years, as well, as pounds and those years make losing weight harder.

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My Surgeon goal was low. He set a goal of 180 lbs.

I started at 265lbs. I want to get to 140lbs. But I'm not gonna worry. I'm gonna focus. Getting healthy and learning how to eat with stages of diet in the beginning. Being grateful to gain strength with any weight loss and happy to reach NSV (non scale victories). in other words Enjoying the whole ride. Later I'll add my own goal.

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I'm 5'4.5" and my doctor goal is 160lbs. I need to be 145 to be considered "normal". I'm going to focus on my doctor's goal because it does seem more attainable. Once I'm there, I will see if I can lose anymore.

For what it's worth, I was in the 160s when I lost weight before having kids and I was a size 8. I think I looked pretty damn good. ;)

160 may not be as big as you're envisioning. Just a consideration.

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You can always look at it the other way too. Will you consider your surgery a failure if you only get to 160? Shoot for 160 as your initial target and once you get there, Celebrate attaining your surgeon's goal. Then go further and reach your own goal!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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