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Why Lie?!?!



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Yep.. I sure could do it and have a gazillion times and that's probably why no one asks me how I'm losing weight. They are very accustomed to me be becoming thin over and over again. I will be using the sleeve tool to remain thin.. So perhaps that's when they will ask me how I'm doing it.

Well congrats to you and hopefully the sleeve will help you stay at your goal weight!

I wish I could have done it without the sleeve, but I always gained it back... Darn southern food! Hopefully now I will be able to get to a healthy weight that I have never seen.

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A couple months ago an acquaintance who I personally know had a WLS' date=' started selling those body wraps that are supposed to shrink your cellulite. After struggling to market them and get customers, a couple weeks ago she started telling people that her weight loss came from the body wraps. Seriously?!?!

.[/quote']

Well, that my dear, IS a deceitful lie. Said for reasons to mislead for a personal financial gain!

So most definitely wrong...

And very different from what these women here are talking about. When they chose not to divulge their business to everyone.

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Ditto. Maybe its the southern girl in me...but I was raised you never ask someone how much money they make' date=' about their weight or their politics. There isn't a polite way to ask those questions and it puts the person on the spot (by forcing an answer), which is incredibly rude. I don't care if they are family or friends or a perfect stranger. You never ask...wait for them to bring it up. Much like you never ask if a woman is expecting!

And its not a lie of omission if it wasn't any of your business to begin with.[/quote']

Lmbo I do love your response! Especially, "And its not a lie of omission if it wasn't any of your business to begin with"

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In many families, circles, and cultures it is considered very low class to share this type of personal information. It's impossible to have blanket statements like "oh this is lying" or "lying by omission or flat out calling people insecure and dishonest.

In the culture I was raised in, it's very much frowned upon, and extremely low brow to tell people you personal business. Now I'm not saying everyone who tells people are low class but what I am saying is that this entire conversation rings of silliness.

If you feel inauthentic if you do not tell every person you come across, then fine, by all means, tell them. But do not apply this logic to everyone.

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Well' date=' that my dear, IS a deceitful lie. Said for reasons to mislead for a personal financial gain!

So most definitely wrong...

And very different from what these women here are talking about. When they chose not to divulge their business to everyone.

[/quote']

Yep. That is why I said everyone is different, and I am not telling anyone that I am right. Everyone has their own journey. I won't be the person who ever judges someone else for the way they choose to walk their's.

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I have a coworker that only works with me sometimes and she is extreemly thin. I never asked her about weight loss at all ,Not knowing that she had ever been overweight . But , as a nurse I can see all the signs of a gastic bypass, hair thinning and relatively unhealty, tiny meals throughout the day. no driinking during meals. Dumping syndrom when she ate sweets.( However ,she loved her sweets , then she'd vomit every day ) very saggy skin....

I mentioned (to my friend )that I was having a hard time trying to stop drinking soda and eating potatoes and my coworker sitting at the same table said that she lost 145 lbs in 7 months with diet and excercise ...now we work very closely together 12 hours a day shared meals and a room together for two weeks .

Never did she exercise even 1 time.

She went on and on about how she lost weight by cutting out the very things that were sitting on her plate- until she went to the bathroom to throw up . I was furious that she would do that . I felt like she was making it all sound so easy when I know she had surgery? WTH ..

Now , I also must disclose that I really didn't like her much before all this happened ( there are reasons related to her telling a lie at work that could have gotten me fired if I could't prove she lied) and of course like her even less now ,but I also feel sorry for her because I didn't even ask her what she did and she felt the need to LIE about it, And make me look weak at the same time ? Weird because I have never done anything to her?

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I have a coworker that only works with me sometimes and she is extreemly thin. I never asked her about weight loss at all ' date='Not knowing that she had ever been overweight . But , as a nurse I can see all the signs of a gastic bypass, hair thinning and relatively unhealty, tiny meals throughout the day. no driinking during meals. Dumping syndrom when she ate sweets.( However ,she loved her sweets , then she'd vomit every day ) very saggy skin....

I mentioned (to my friend )that I was having a hard time trying to stop drinking soda and eating potatoes and my coworker sitting at the same table said that she lost 145 lbs in 7 months with diet and excercise ...now we work very closely together 12 hours a day shared meals and a room together for two weeks .

Never did she exercise even 1 time.

She went on and on about how she lost weight by cutting out the very things that were sitting on her plate- until she went to the bathroom to throw up . I was furious that she would do that . I felt like she was making it all sound so easy when I know she had surgery? WTH ..

Now , I also must disclose that I really didn't like her much before all this happened ( there are reasons related to her telling a lie at work that could have gotten me fired if I could't prove she lied) and of course like her even less now ,but I also feel sorry for her because I didn't even ask her what she did and she felt the need to LIE about it, And make me look weak at the same time ? Weird because I have never done anything to her?[/quote']

It does make people seem weak when others gloat how they lost it with diet and exercise. That's why you can't always believe what individuals say because people are no always honest.

I work in an environment where I see the ugliness of humans on a daily basis... Individuals that lie unnecessarily.

Edgar Allen Poe said it best - "Believe only half of what you see and nothing that you hear."

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I have a coworker that only works with me sometimes and she is extreemly thin. I never asked her about weight loss at all ,Not knowing that she had ever been overweight . But , as a nurse I can see all the signs of a gastic bypass, hair thinning and relatively unhealty, tiny meals throughout the day. no driinking during meals. Dumping syndrom when she ate sweets.( However ,she loved her sweets , then she'd vomit every day ) very saggy skin....

I mentioned (to my friend )that I was having a hard time trying to stop drinking soda and eating potatoes and my coworker sitting at the same table said that she lost 145 lbs in 7 months with diet and excercise ...now we work very closely together 12 hours a day shared meals and a room together for two weeks .

Never did she exercise even 1 time.

She went on and on about how she lost weight by cutting out the very things that were sitting on her plate- until she went to the bathroom to throw up . I was furious that she would do that . I felt like she was making it all sound so easy when I know she had surgery? WTH ..

Now , I also must disclose that I really didn't like her much before all this happened ( there are reasons related to her telling a lie at work that could have gotten me fired if I could't prove she lied) and of course like her even less now ,but I also feel sorry for her because I didn't even ask her what she did and she felt the need to LIE about it, And make me look weak at the same time ? Weird because I have never done anything to her?

Just try to ignore her, (as much as you possibly can in your work environment) obviously she is delusional and has other issues to deal with. Focus on yourself and your journey. :)

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Just try to ignore her, (as much as you possibly can in your work environment) obviously she is delusional and has other issues to deal with. Focus on yourself and your journey. :)

being a psych nurse, I know "delusional" well and what I can say to you is that there is not enough information here to say if someone is having delusions or not. I don't know if you really don't know what that means, if you like to armchair diagnose over the internet because it makes you feel better about yourself, or what this is but not only is it a pet peeve to any ACTUAL professionals when people do that type of thing, its silly.

Maybe I'm touchy about it because I'm actually going to school for my NP so I have diagnosing rights or maybe you just rub me the wrong way every time I see a post from you because it almost always rings of superiority... but that type of thing is just silly to say the least.

The women could be having any number of issues. Do people understand that dumping syndrome is not exclusive to gastric bypass surgery?

ANY type of gastrointestinal operation, and I am not just talking about weight loss surgery. In fact, not a single one of those symptoms listed exclusive to any type of weight loss surgery, and they are all extremely common with LOTS of different procedures, sicknesses, and even psychological issues. These are common, common, COMMON.

That being said, is it likely that maybe she had a WLS procedure? Sure, it is not unreasonable to think that, but if you think for one second its any of your business and this woman should just fess up and tell you, I question how you came to decide you were entitled to this information. She could be feeling shame about failed dieting attempts, she could be experiencing complications that she doesn't want to talk about, she could be upset about her choice, or she may just be a private person. And all of that is assuming that she DID in fact have weight loss surgery.

I just want to say this one last thing before I unsubscribe from this thread, because its crawling with busybody type women (which is supremely unappealing). The more educated you get, the more you realize how much you do not understand about things. My years in the medical field (even though I am young, I've been in medicine since I was 18) have taught me that you really cannot assume anything. You just can't. You.don't.know. ANYTHING. It's laughable to watch all these people here with so little information grasp at straws to make every situation applicable to themselves. Maybe its comforting for people to feel like they are not the only ones who made the choice to do this, but that is what this community is for. You do not need to reach out to UNWILLING participants in your own lives and try to drag something out of them they don't want to share or might not even be true. Only you look stupid in the end for those types of clear boundary issues. Let them be, love them, they probably need it. Maybe if you were not digging for dirt they might share what is really going on with them.

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Most people are comfortable talking about how they got fat so why would they dicuss how they lost weight.. Now those that choose to not give all the facts by saying I lost wt through exercise and diet might as not say anything at all....true exercise and diet is a major factor but you had WLS. I feel like if your going to leave major details then keep it to yourself. Most ppl leave Wls out because they don't want to hear negative comments or their afraid of someone saying it's the easy way....I have a strong personality and the world will know I had WLS....but I can't see someone only giving out part of the information that makes them look good or feel accepted. Everyday all day someones buying titties and altering their body so why can't I buy a healthier body....IJS

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Most people are comfortable talking about how they got fat so why would they dicuss how they lost weight.. Now those that choose to not give all the facts by saying I lost wt through exercise and diet might as not say anything at all....true exercise and diet is a major factor but you had WLS. I feel like if your going to leave major details then keep it to yourself. Most ppl leave Wls out because they don't want to hear negative comments or their afraid of someone saying it's the easy way....I have a strong personality and the world will know I had WLS....but I can't see someone only giving out part of the information that makes them look good or feel accepted. Everyday all day someones buying titties and altering their body so why can't I buy a healthier body....IJS

I don't think that not telling is akin to trying to "look good" or "feel accepted"

And I really don't put this surgery in the same place as "buying titties" you are not buying an healthier body you are having major surgery to help you get healthy hopefully... that is if you can stick to the diet and exercise plan...

I don't disagree with your stance on telling EVERYONE, but after you have your surgery who knows you may change you mind again. Or take it on a case by case basis?

And for that I will not judge...

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I don't think that not telling is akin to trying to "look good" or "feel accepted"

And I really don't put this surgery in the same place as "buying titties" you are not buying an healthier body you are having major surgery to help you get healthy hopefully... that is if you can stick to the diet and exercise plan...

I don't disagree with your stance on telling EVERYONE' date=' but after you have your surgery who knows you may change you mind again. Or take it on a case by case basis?

And for that I will not judge...[/quote']

To late everyone knows....and secondly I said people choose to leave out facts. Most ppl have said they dont want to hear what ppl have to say so they saydiet and exercise...I said buying a healthier body and better health and possible prolonging my life and yes that's my take on MY surgery. An alteration of the body is just what it is...so buying tittes is an alteration for maybe looks and social status....and paying for yes buying a smaller stomach is for health, social status and more either way it's an alteration..

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"WLS....but I can't see someone only giving out part of the information that makes them look good or feel accepted."

I find my weight no ones business. And I certainly don't give partial info just to make myself look good or feel accepted. I don't give a **** if someone thinks I'm good at something or accept me. To me, my weight gain and/or loss is very personal to me.

I guess I could take your advice and when someone insists on prying and asks me about my weight.. And instead of giving a partial answer, I will simply not answer and see how that flies

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To late everyone knows....and secondly I said people choose to leave out facts. Most ppl have said they dont want to hear what ppl have to say so they saydiet and exercise...I said buying a healthier body and better health and possible prolonging my life and yes that's my take on MY surgery. An alteration of the body is just what it is...so buying tittes is an alteration for maybe looks and social status....and paying for yes buying a smaller stomach is for health' date=' social status and more either way it's an alteration..[/quote']

I think you and I are two different people, and there is really no way we can relate to each other.

It happens... I should of realized it at the word

"Titties"

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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