Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Why Lie?!?!



Recommended Posts

I didn't mean to say anything to make you defensive or put you on guard or anything' date=' I'm just saying it's possible. Of course I don't know this person and I've never seen her and the facts are limited but I know people who have gone on Optifast for 3 and half months and lost 90 pounds... They didn't have surgery (and I think they will probably gain it back, but thats something I keep to myself because I don't want to be negative towards them) but yeah, I wasn't trying to go off and say you are wrong or anything, because your probably not, its a logical conclusion to come too, all I am saying is it that its POSSIBLE it wasn't too.[/quote']

It's okay. My issue isn't necessarily focused on that incident, but Everyone who lie to obese people about losing weight... Tell us anything and we're expected to believe it.

I did medifast which is very similar to that and as I stated before most people will be truthful about other methods of losing weight. And yes as soon as I stopped, I gained all my weight back plus some

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah, I dont think diets like that address long term over-eating tendencies.

What would you have someone like me tell someone who asked me how I lost weight if I wasn't ready to disclose surgery? I don't even know how to handle it honestly.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm a pretty open person, generally. At work (a very conservative department in a very conservative-cultured company) I've only told 2 people - one in HR, and one friend in another department who is a band-to-bypass patient at my doctor's practice. If asked, I kind of head them off at the pass and simply say I'm eating less, making better choices, and exercising (totally true). No one bats an eye. And if I'm super dense and it turns out they suspect something else is going on, then let them talk. It's a medical based company, and I deal with HIPAA all the time, so I'm down with all the privacy stuff. I just figure, it's no one's business, and will remain that way.

I've told close friends, family and some of my son's friends' moms. Only a select few have commented in a positive way. Some have made really dumb comments ("get ready to throw up all the time") and a few look at me as if I've just announced I'm having gender reassignment surgery. Some don't comment at all. Either they don't care or are a bit envious. So no, I've not really received a ton of support from those I've told, which to me further justifies my choice for not telling co-workers.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's odd. When it comes down to it...

It's no one's business.

It's nothing to hide or be ashamed of.

Amanda Rae

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah' date=' I dont think diets like that address long term over-eating tendencies.

What would you have someone like me tell someone who asked me how I lost weight if I wasn't ready to disclose surgery? I don't even know how to handle it honestly.[/quote']

I would honestly say its something private and I rather not discuss it. That response will come off as being something really serious.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Holly5.3 you nailed it' date=' but I think it goes beyond celebrity... Once WE stop feeling ashamed about it and stop looking at it as something negative, than more people will be receptive. People will proudly announce a boob job or even a tummy tuck... But wls????? Oh no!

[/quote']

This is the very thing I had to tell my friend she's fussing about me having the sleeve but yet your stomach is big and you want a Tummy Tuck but since ppl are talking about cosmetic surgery openly she with having it is seen on tv and talked about its seem almost normal but because we in general don't talk about wls and most are a shame it seems in normal but yet wls have saved lives what has getting a breast job or tummy tuck done for the world ..I'm pround to been giving opportunity to have the surgery and my insurance it paying most of the cost we have to help other ppl are in the position we once was in but yes they have to be willing

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I didn't mean to say anything to make you defensive or put you on guard or anything' date=' I'm just saying it's possible. Of course I don't know this person and I've never seen her and the facts are limited but I know people who have gone on Optifast for 3 and half months and lost 90 pounds... They didn't have surgery (and I think they will probably gain it back, but thats something I keep to myself because I don't want to be negative towards them) but yeah, I wasn't trying to go off and say you are wrong or anything, because your probably not, its a logical conclusion to come too, all I am saying is it that its POSSIBLE it wasn't too.[/quote']

I think if it was possible in this case she probably would have said that's how she lost weight if it was something other then wls cause most ppl lie when it's wls surgery out of fear of ppl saying u took the easy way out cause when you lost a large amount of weight on your on its empowering to most she would have yelled that out my opinion

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm a pretty open person' date=' generally. At work (a very conservative department in a very conservative-cultured company) I've only told 2 people - one in HR, and one friend in another department who is a band-to-bypass patient at my doctor's practice. If asked, I kind of head them off at the pass and simply say I'm eating less, making better choices, and exercising (totally true). No one bats an eye. And if I'm super dense and it turns out they suspect something else is going on, then let them talk. It's a medical based company, and I deal with HIPAA all the time, so I'm down with all the privacy stuff. I just figure, it's no one's business, and will remain that way.

I've told close friends, family and some of my son's friends' moms. Only a select few have commented in a positive way. Some have made really dumb comments ("get ready to throw up all the time") and a few look at me as if I've just announced I'm having gender reassignment surgery. Some don't comment at all. Either they don't care or are a bit envious. So no, I've not really received a ton of support from those I've told, which to me further justifies my choice for not telling co-workers.[/quote']

HIPPA only a ply when your in a position the requires to hold others ppl personal info like example a nurse so taking about yourself is far game I'm just saying ..Lol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At the end of the day it's no one biz and that okay if you feel that way but why is it easy for you all dont say that when you come to this forum ; Internet ) and tell all your biz yes we all having the same surgery but yet we all strangers to one another but since we having the same surgery you feel like sharing so why not share with ppl who are genuine about wanting to lose weight now nosey ppl I get if you don't want to be judge by them it all sounds contradicting to me but hey I'm the girl who cut all my hair to go natural when they told me not to I'm the girl told every body that I'm getting sleeved good luck to all the ppl that tell and the ppl that chose to lie just say its non of your biz don't give false hope cause we all kno what it feels Like see someone losing weight and we like girl what you doing tell cause I want to do it .. And you realize you can't get the same results cause this person has a tool

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is the very thing I had to tell my friend she's fussing about me having the sleeve but yet your stomach is big and you want a Tummy Tuck but since ppl are talking about cosmetic surgery openly she with having it is seen on tv and talked about its seem almost normal but because we in general don't talk about wls and most are a shame it seems in normal but yet wls have saved lives what has getting a breast job or tummy tuck done for the world ..I'm pround to been giving opportunity to have the surgery and my insurance it paying most of the cost we have to help other ppl are in the position we once was in but yes they have to be willing

My insurance isn't paying for mine, but I am still very thankful to be able to have mine in a couple of weeks.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Very open about it could care less!! What people think or SAY!!! I did it for me and my family!!! AND to me anybody who has negative things to say are just HATERS!!! I just shake them OFF!!! Because this surgery is not a easy ride you have to control yourself and workout its still alot of work!! ANd alot of people think its the easy way out BLAH BLAH BLAH they can talk all they want but until they've been in our shoes they can ZIP it!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This journey is a personal one. I had surgery 8-4-12. Sw 205, DA 195, GW 125....CW 125. I did this for me. Period. No one needs to know my journey. To be honest I believe I blew this out of the Water because I didn't have negative back lash from anyone. Did you know it take six to ten possitive comments to cancel out the damage of one negative comment? When embarked on lifelong journeys to better ourselves, it's no bodys business but your own. When people say what have you been doing I tell them. I work my a** off, which I do. I make sure I eat right, I do not put anything in my body that is not going to benifit me. I take Vitamins everyday and I move my body. This is a personal decision, there is no right or wrong way to deal with the question of ,"how did you do it." You need to do what is right for you. Avoiding negative backlass is part of my regiment for being so successful! :-) Be possitive, and be good humans.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Amen, Kristy Lee.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ok. Im on the fence on this one. I am pre-op and have been going back and fourth in what Im going tell people. I get telling people who are going through their own weight loss struggle but I also know a lot of people.... Obese people that are going to react negatively all be it ignorantly to my choice to have surgery. Why should I subject myself to that? If its someone who I think is open minded I can trust to be supportive then I will be honest if not.... I will probably keep it simple and tell them I stopped eating.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I haven't told anyone at work and don't plan to. I won't lie if asked, but I'm not talking about it. I'm not ashamed, I'm private. I wouldn't tell them if I had cancer either. I simply don't want to talk about my health.

I've told many of my friends though. Hadn't, and don't plan to tell casual acquaintances or neighbors that I see twice a year. If they knew me well they would know already.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×