Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

My Suggestion-Stop The Obsessing. Rules Are Meant To Be Broken



Recommended Posts

It seems that there are two major groups on this forum. Those who get the sleeve and use the tool to eat less and loose weight and those who get the sleeve to kick off a new life of healthly eating' date=' exersice, Protein shakes and basicly a totally new life. The first group, in which I belong, is a little more laid back, we are going to incorporate birthday cake and margaritas. I would love it if the group of "Sleeve life changer- health nuts" would give us "Laid back sleevers" a break and not accuse of us of being trolls, or giving bad advice. We have a different lifestyle, it is okay not to be just like you, I promise. There needs to be room for both types of people on this forum. When I first started reading I thought the only people on here were health fanatics, I am glad to see there are people who are not running 5k's and drinking Protein Shakes 4 weeks out.[/quote']

Way to lump us all together.

There are other types of people on here as well....those who have severe eating disorders and have not addressed them before surgery. They are not laid back and they certainly are not health nuts. Which way should they be advised to go?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@butter I stick to my original post. I am not lumping. I am speaking of a)the pre diet liquid obsession.. If it is killing you then have a bowl of veggie or chicken soup.. Live it up. It is PROVEN to not affect your liver for the surgery if you do it only once or twice, etc.. B) the post 1 to 6 week diet folk who are on liquids.. Well, since many docs allow puree on day 2, I still stick to my post and tell those who are having a hard go on week 2 or 3 or 4, etc post op liquid to live it up and take a 4 oz can of tuna, for ex, add two TB of light mayo. add some salt, dash of sugar and some onion powder and pepper and have an INCREDIBLY healthy meal (sub canned chicken if you don't like fish) that will indeed be on their lifetime diet.. It won;t hurt them was my point and I was really dealing with those obsessing on here.. I get it and was trying to help.. People fantasizing about food, what they'll have in 7 weeks, etc.. GO for it.. It's ok if your stomach can handle it.. eat slowly and wait for reaction. I'm NO doc and No shrink, of course, but was never my intention. BTW, YAY on the comment on laid back sleevers. I'm too new to know if I'll be one, but suspect I will but also am incorporating (or plan 2) the second group, that also watches healthy eating and working out etc..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Way to lump us all together.

There are other types of people on here as well....those who have severe eating disorders and have not addressed them before surgery. They are not laid back and they certainly are not health nuts. Which way should they be advised to go?

Or what about people who have severe (non weight) related issues like auto-immune diseases? What about....the list is endless. We really aren't two groups as if we are divided down the middle. At least I hope not!

I really wasn't going to post as i was enjoying just reading all the silly going ons. But, this one got me. I thought the whole idea of this forum was accepting each others individuality?

As for the OP? I put his post down as excitement. He's only 2 weeks out, people! Remember the ups and downs and aha moments your first month? True, I think it was rather irresponsible to spout off as he did as if it were all facts, but did you guys catch that he's a 'motivational speaker?' I'll keep my personal feelings out of that profession, but most are paid to speak as if what they say is the honest to God only way to be. (I say most because there are SOME good motivational speakers out there. Opps, my opinion got in the way.)

I just hope that newbies follow their doc's orders because your doctor is the one who is helping you with your care. If he doesn't want you to have that dorito, don't have it!

About Obsessing? If someone is so obsessive about food post surgery that they are going agnst their docs orders, then if they don't get help for their eating disorder (which led us all to this surgery to begin with) then down the road they will more than likely have a harder time. So to me, it's sad that the OP was celebrating that it's ok to disobey their personal docs orders.

Again, I rarely join these debates, but this one bugs me on too many levels to be quiet.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@butter I stick to my original post. I am not lumping. I am speaking of a)the pre diet liquid obsession.. If it is killing you then have a bowl of veggie or chicken soup.. Live it up. It is PROVEN to not affect your liver for the surgery if you do it only once or twice' date=' etc.. <img src='http://www.bariatricpal.com/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/cool.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='B)' /> the post 1 to 6 week diet folk who are on liquids.. Well, since many docs allow puree on day 2, I still stick to my post and tell those who are having a hard go on week 2 or 3 or 4, etc post op liquid to live it up and take a 4 oz can of tuna, for ex, add two TB of light mayo. add some salt, dash of sugar and some onion powder and pepper and have an INCREDIBLY healthy meal (sub canned chicken if you don't like fish) that will indeed be on their lifetime diet.. It won;t hurt them was my point and I was really dealing with those obsessing on here.. I get it and was trying to help.. People fantasizing about food, what they'll have in 7 weeks, etc.. GO for it.. It's ok if your stomach can handle it.. eat slowly and wait for reaction. I'm NO doc and No shrink, of course, but was never my intention. BTW, YAY on the comment on laid back sleevers. I'm too new to know if I'll be one, but suspect I will but also am incorporating (or plan 2) the second group, that also watches healthy eating and working out etc..[/quote']

I repeat....IRRESPONSIBLE POST. Do what your own surgeon tells you to do. Period. Until all the studies are done and a united protocol is established, follow your docs orders because he is the one treating you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Amen Doxie!!!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Why bother responding to your post when you go back and edit, add and back track everything you say.

And yes you edit every single post by volumes and changes galore.

A valid debate never needs editing once given.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Umm @lessofme, I have not yet spoken about anything OTHER THAN the one week preop and the two weeks post op, of which I have completed just like anyone with 2 years of sleeve history.. So, not quite. That's why I don't comment on the future. I did call my DOC and said I was dying and they said to live it up pre surgery with some Soup. So, feel free for anyone to call ur doc and ask.. My bro also okd it.. So, not blind on what my doc and many have told me and what I did for my first 3 weeks. Just sayin'

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It seems that there are two major groups on this forum. Those who get the sleeve and use the tool to eat less and loose weight and those who get the sleeve to kick off a new life of healthly eating' date=' exersice, Protein shakes and basicly a totally new life. The first group, in which I belong, is a little more laid back, we are going to incorporate birthday cake and margaritas. I would love it if the group of "Sleeve life changer- health nuts" would give us "Laid back sleevers" a break and not accuse of us of being trolls, or giving bad advice. We have a different lifestyle, it is okay not to be just like you, I promise. There needs to be room for both types of people on this forum. When I first started reading I thought the only people on here were health fanatics, I am glad to see there are people who are not running 5k's and drinking Protein Shakes 4 weeks out.[/quote']

I'm in neither of those groups, what I am is someone who had to shoot myself in the *ss with insulin every other day, and take 2 diabetes and 2 b/p meds everyday because of eating too much of the wrong stuff. If you've never had a chronic illness, or never had to worry about losing a leg, going blind, or not being able to have children, then you have no clue. Maybe you just "wanted to eat less and lose some weight", so you can buy some new clothes, that's fine too. I did this to save my life, so you can put me in the Sleeve Life Savers club, and I guarantee there are lot more us out there than in your other groups.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Forgot to mention the OP about Caffeine. (I'm not going to copy the whole post, just go to the OP if you are just joining us.).

It IS bad for those with more acidic stomachs. It truly is. I'm not a coffee drinker so if coffee drinkers want to help me here, i'm pretty sure that caffeine/coffee is acidic? And that's the last thing our poor 'new' tummies need.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So I have read through all the posts on here, and I agree on some and disagree on others. I am getting close to my 2 yr anniversary, so I am not sure if that allocates me as a veteran, but I do think have a more experience than some.

Here is my take. The rules are there to help people develop new habits. I used my first 6 months to develop new eating habits that I could live with. Did you read that part, that I could LIVE with. I do worry about some of the people on here that go to absolute extremes with post-op diet, obsessing over every calorie, carb or Protein gram that passes their lips. Neilsleeve, you are correct in that. We were all good at diets, but diets are not something that you can live with forever. I never counted or weighed anything. BUT, I did use that time, like I said, to form a new routine, a new way of looking at food, and a new way of eating.

I think telling people to go out and eat whatever they want is not good advice. Like ButtertheBean said, there are the people out there that have not dealt with their issues and are just waiting for someone to say it is ok to eat a chip. I don't think people can go into this surgery expecting to not change a single thing and have a positive result. Sure, you will lose weight. Will you reach your goal, maybe, maybe not. Will you be able to maintain, chances are probably not. The further out you are, the more you can eat. And trust me, although it is nothing compared to what a person could eat pre-op, if you aren't careful, you can eat a substantial amount. And if you continue to eat foods that are unhealthy, you are going to be in trouble. How do I know, I have seen it. I have seen others that have went through the same program that I have. They have not changed anything. Eating chips and crackers, eating fries everyday and justifying it by saying, well, I can just eat a little. And some of those people have lost the weight, only to start to regain. Maybe not the 100lbs that they lost, but all of a sudden they have put 20 or 30 lbs back on, which is harder to lose 2 years out than 2 months out. It takes 1 year to form a new habit, take the first post op year to form yours.

I do completely agree with the obsessing. Now, you have to do what works for you. But, cutting out complete food groups or going to eating extremes does not form a healthy relationship with food nor do I think that it is sustainable for the long term. If I like Bananas and I post a recipe with Bananas, I am not asking you to come on here and preach to me about how "fattening" bananas are. Do they have carbs? Yes. Are they higher in calories than other fruits? Yes. Are they unhealthy? No. If your world is consumed by every morsel you are putting in your mouth, you are going to be miserable. Like I said, I have never counted anything, and I have never dieted. But I also know my trigger foods and do not keep them in my house. Does that mean I never have anything that would be classed as a treat? Hell no! I have ice cream, I have chocolate, and I have chips. They key is, I only have small amounts and I do not have them often. The key here is healthy, lifelong changes, not diets.

The last point I would like to make, and sorry for the long post, but it was touched on, is the guilt and shame around food. We have spent our whole lives feeling guilty and made to feel bad about what we eat. It creates a vicious cycle of eating something we think we shouldn't, feeling guilty and beating ourselves up, and then eating more to shove down the pain of the guilt. The sleeve is an opportunity to develop a healthy relationship with food. And it is not easy. There are days that I still struggle. But I have worked very hard at putting those feelings in their place. If I have a few chips, should I feel bad about it. No? If I eat half a bag of chips, should I feel bad? Equally, no. Learn from it and use it as a chance to change. Tomorrow is a new day and use that new day to make better choices. Let's stop beating ourselves up and berating ourselves every day. I am not going to let food define who I am anymore.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Geeze, @lessofme, I don't think you have been reading clearly. I agree with you!! Same goes for any food. If YOUR OWN stomach can't handle anything don't do it.. My point was for those who know they won't stay off coffee and don't want to and whose bellies can handle it.... Then my post remains valid.. U guys who don't agree with things crack me up, but I enjoy give and take and glad there is such passion on this. Funny how the vast majority like this post and so agree and about a quarter think I'm the antichrist. I'm Jewish, but not that lol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

wow I could say so much on this topic but it has been said by Pookiesm, PDXman,Butterthebean and Doxie so Im done here. I just want to say I am a firm believer in following doctors orders. Also my Dr instructs me himself not his brother so I feel confident it is his expertise I am following.

best of luck to everyone.

Surgery and healing from it is serious business.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Great post SuperS!

And I think many of us agree with you.

What bothers me about the OP is he's saying have what people are obsessing about only 2 weeks out. That really doesn't help develop true better eating habits down the road.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Amen LessofMe!!! :-)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

actually I think you arent reading clearly, I didnt post about the coffee lol

that was Doxie but I can say I totally agree with her :)

good day

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×