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15 Months Out- Feeling Like A Failure



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So I am 15 months out & lately I have been feeling like a failure. I have gone from 260 (Jan 2011) to 142 (now)... but the last month & a half I have been doing terrible. Before I was running 3-4 times a week & really sticking to the high Protein, low-carb diet. After an unpleasant break up with my boyfriend, the running stopped & I have been eating crap (M&Ms, doughnuts, etc) I feel gross, bloated & fat. I've even been avoiding this site because I feel guilty about it. I am about 20 pounds from my goal & I consider it a miracle that I haven't gained 10 pounds with all the junk I've consumed. I've decided I need to do the Atkins induction for a couple weeks to get myself back on track. It really makes me realize that like any addiction, I will have to fight not to revert to old habits & fall off the wagon, so to speak. I know that I can do this. I just need to dig in & find that inner strength.

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Do the primal diet with me! I've been sticking it to it over a month now. I have a thread about it in the food subforum, might be a few pages back.

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You have done AMAZING so far and be proud of what you have done!!! So you have had a setback....we will ALL go through this at one time or another. You have lost a great deal of weight and you are not perfect. You know what you need to do and that is what is important. Give yourself some credit....you can do this!! You have come so far PLEASE do not quit now!!

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You might want to consider seeing a psychologist like any other addiction you may need additional assistance with this...stay encouraged and focused

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Boys are dumb and make us do dumb things!!

Good luck and try to reclaim you :)

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I wouldn't go as as far as saying "boys are dumb", but you need to focus on yourself & what's best for YOU & your health. Relationships come and go, but you've only got one if you. Do right by yourself & good luck.

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Reaching out for help is the right thing to do. food addiction is so stinkin' difficult to overcome alone. I've been struggling since the day after my surgery, which was only 8 days ago. It's gonna be a long road. I pray that I have the strength to overcome.

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It is his loss, do not give up your power. Look have amazingly far you have come...YOU DID THAT. I agree you should see someone because food is a crazy addiction, and it is legal, and all around us. Today get up put both feet on the ground and start to run again, for yourself.

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I was of course joking...I have a husband and FOUR sons..just trying to cheer a person up.

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Wow you have lost ONE-HUNDRED-FIFTEEN pounds definately not a failure! congrats. You already stated the problem just a little setback time to get back on the pony and ride. We all slip back into letting emotions guide our eating but it sounds like you already have a plan stick to it. Good luck!

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ILKrista,

there is nothing wrong with kicking back and having some time out of this rollercoaster ride! Don't beat yourself up over a few extra calories... you did what you had to do... good for you!

As far as being a failure... erm, NO WAY!! Look at what you have already achieved... my goodness, you are bloody amazing! You've already lost a small person... and just those last pesky 20 left to goal...well, my lovely, you can sooooo do this.

I think you have done the right thing by popping on here, reflecting on the last couple of weeks/mths (?) and now it seems that you are ready to move forward.

I think this is a blip in the road, not a road block!

Good luck with the last part of your transformation. Please don't think yourself a failure... I promise you, you are not! =]

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consider it a miracle that I haven't gained 10 pounds with all the junk I've consumed.

ILKrista

You are deserving of all the wonderful compliments you are receiving. You have done amazingly well. Of course i am sure you worked and fought all the way. Losing all that weight OMG You are most definately not a failure, please believe that., how cold you be a failure?

I am also a believer of tough love.

Its tough when anyone goes through a rough breakup. I am so sorry this happened. But girlfriend, if you keep eating what you are eating, the junk food, you will gain those 10, 20,30+ lbs. back. You don't want to do that.

You are making excuses (of course I understand that) but if it hadn't been your breakup, it could have been you were fired from your job or any sad thing. There is always going to be something out there that will bum a person out.

You gotta let each "downfall" (can't think of the right words) go past and not get the better of you. I know this is easier said than done.

I'm sure I'll have this some kind of problem in my future too. We just can't let those feelings win and start eating the demon again.

Please feel better, and as i said once before,

when you start to reach for those M&M's with the right hand - pick up your other hand and slap it. The pain alone will hopefully prevent you from eating that junk.

Hope i wasn't too harsh

my heart is sending you good thoughts and wishes

you are absolutely terrific

you will get throught this

Kathy

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oooops sorry for the double posting from above

kathy

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I am pre op ( band removal and waiting for my stomach to heal for the the band) but what I do know I'd what a role food plays in self soothing. Whenever things are rough for me, my best friend (food) is always there to make me feel better....but that "friend" is just a crappy crutch who got me into this mess in the first place. Find people you love like friends and family and let them envelope you in their love. Also, do something great for yourself instead...like a pedicure. Also, check into getting fake eyelashes...they are the BOMB. You are already a fox but with those flirty lashes, you'll bring all the boys to the yard. Not that you need the boys, but the attention might be nice and will remind you that the it's the stupid boys loss...and that you can do better.

Either way, good luck and be kind to yourself. These things do happen for a reason.

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You made the first big step in getting back on track- coming back here! Good for you!

Now. Throw the junk in the garbage and go shopping again. This time with a list of good for you, yummy things! Re-stock your fridge and pantry and get RIGHT back on track. Now. Not tomorrow or tonight even, now!

You KNOW how to do this, so do it! You are giving the icky boy WAY too much power over you and I KNOW you don't want to give him anymore of your power.

Best wishes!!!

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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