All These Emotions...

[MsDebi 6]

So it is 9:30 pm here and I am about to try to get some sleep. The last steps before my surgery (3/5/2012) are tomorrow. We leave at 5:30 in the morning and I have blood tests, urinalysis, x-rays and upper GI starting at 7:30. Then, at 9:30 I meet with the nutritionist. After a break, I see my surgeon at 1:30 for my pre op appointment.

I'm sitting here wondering exactly how I am feeling...but it is so complicated. I'm so very excited that the date is finally so close. I'm hopeful that this will be the tool that I need to finally accomplish the goal of a healthier me. Admittingly, a little bit blue that food won't be so important to me anymore (strange, I know, but I honestly do feel a bit sad for that). I'm really happy and proud that I am doing this for me. But for the most part, I am scared to death that I will fail. I'm committed, for sure...100% committed....but still so fearful of the "unatainable goal".

I really need some words of encouragement from people who understand.

[KristinaRN 54]

I felt much the same way before my surgery. Now, almost 6 months out, I no longer feel that failure is an option. The sleeve is not a magic wand BY ANY MEANS, you still have to put in the effort, but it is the tool I needed for my efforts to work. YOU CAN DO THIS!!! If you decide right here and now that you are commited to changing your life moving forward, no regrets and no looking back, then I believe you will succeed. Much luck to you!

[VJSlim 156]

Dont worry MsDebi! Everyone goes through the same. But you will find that this tool, unlike all the others that you may have tried for weight loss in the past, will never fail. It will push you towards your goal each day. Of course there are all sorts of degrees of success - some lose faster than the others. But your goals would NEVER be 'unattainable'.

I suggest you ask all your questions to your surgeon : post surgery diet plan, medication, how long he/she thinks you may need for recovery etc. Be prepared. Follow his/her instructions strictly. All will be well.

[mamasez 9]

Been there, done that, had the same feelings. My sleeve is a hard tool to fail with. It only allows me to eat so much. Could I suck on high cal shakes all day and defeat (for lack of a better word) the sleeve? Yeah, but that would be just too stupid!

You will have to work at becoming healthy in body and mind b/c there is no easy way out of obesity if you love food and have depended on it in the past to help you for whatever reason. Again, there is no EASY way out. But my sleeve has made a new, healthy life possible. I am 4 months out now and already I am forming a new relationship with food. I do still enjoy food, but I am not using it as my "friend" anymore.

When I dieted in the past, I had a temporary mindset and always gained the weight back. My sleeve provides me a forever plan and I am living this new post-sleeve life one day at a time. I am going to treat my.sleeve right by trying to undereat the sleeve because I wantt its effects to last the rest of my life. I had to make up my mind that food never really was a good friend anyway. It was a crutch and it was slowly killing me because we had an unhealthy relationship.

I can't tell you that the sleeve is the right decision for YOU, but I can tell you that it is a wonderful tool that can change your life. I did go through a lot of emotions about how drastically my everyday life would change. But honestly, it has changed for the better. I am learning so much about developing a healthy realtionship with food. I do enioy my food still, but I am no longer dependent on it. I am learning to enjoy it and use it appropriately. Only took me 50 years!

[Rainydayz 27]

It does seem like our goals are unattainable for much of our lives doesn't it? But with this surgery you will have the best chance you could get for reaching those goals.

Before the sleeve I could lose weight - sure - couldn't we all? But as soon as I "slipped" then I felt like sisyphus trying to roll that rock up the mountain just to watch it fall back down. With the sleeve, if I slip - and I have- then I don't fall all the way back down. I stay right where I'm at until I have the energy and gumption to keep moving forward. That's what the sleeve has done for me. It's still work, but the work is actually getting me somewhere this time.

Here's hoping you have a great day and everything goes smoothly right up to and after your surgery day! This will all be over soon and you'll be up that mountain before you know it!

[Writergirl 230]

The night before my surgery I was all alone in the house and without any warning at all I burst into tears and just howled for about 15 minutes. I mourned the death of my relationship with food just like I had just gotten news that someone had died. So I think it's pretty normal to be feeling sad, along with all the other feelings. I thought I'd be mooning around afterwards, too, but other than some moments of feeling sorry for myself, at one month out I can tell you it's not been too difficult. I ask myself with every food choice if I'm making a good or bad choice, and I'm now actually beginning to lose interest in foods that have little nutritional value. So I say just go with it, keep being honest with yourself, and know that this is a journey, not a straight shot to the finish line. Best of luck with your surgery! We'll be here for you afterwards!

[Lissa 2,631]

Rainydayz, You just said one of the most important things I've ever read about VSG. "With the sleeve, if I slip - and I have- then I don't fall all the way back down. I stay right where I'm at until I have the energy and gumption to keep moving forward." That's profound! This is not a race to the finish line. Sometimes we do just need to rest a bit before we start working hard again. Our bodies definitely know this, that's why we have "stalls" or "plateaus".