Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Anybody Else Feel Guilty?



Recommended Posts

The past few days I have eaten really crappy. Nowhere what I ate pre sleeve. But definitely over my 800 calories. I worked out yesterday and mall walked today. Bit I'm still feeling like a failure and am scared I will have gained 5 pounds:(

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Guilt and fear are good emotions to feel. They are indicatiors that we are not doing what we know we should be doing. Imagine how destructive it would be if you felt no shame for transgressions.

You know what you did wrong, you know that it was not in your best interest to move you toward success and you what you need to do in the future to avoid feeling this way again. Now pick yourself up, stop feeling bad and everytime you have a decision to make view it as an opportunity to be succesful. Many small, correct decisions will lead to very rewarding outcomes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I doubt that you gained 5 pounds. We all have slips, even with the sleeve. It doesn't make our choices for us. But don't beat yourself up. As Paul said above, new day, new start. Just regroup and move on. You will do great. For me, dweling on the negative feelings tends to drag me down and keeps me from seeing the bright side of things - like what I did right or keeping perspective (things weren't that bad). So accept you are only human and back to rocking that sleeve! Congrats on the progress you made so far!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Didn't we do this crap enough when we where fatter? Didn't we beat ourselves up enough? Why should we feel so guilty over everything we do? We have this wonderful tool and helps with restriction. We will never again eat like we used too. Never again will we be 100 lbs, 150 lbs, 200lbs, overweight. . . aren't we allowed to live our lives finally? I can tell you something. . I love me, I am a success, and I will never again feel guilty because I ate something I truly enjoyed. . . good luck ! And enjoy YOU!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You may be surprised that you may not have gained at all. But if you did, there is good news! Today is a NEW day, NEW beginning (thank GOD) and just get back on your program, you will be fine...hugs!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i have problems eating enough to be quite honest. going on close to 3 months post op, can eat pretty much what i want, just im never hungry, just had 30 grams of Protein via shake form, there some leftover turkey around here tho...hehe..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have eaten carb carbs carbs for three days straight- I loved every bit and I am firmly back on plan today. Recently I got to a new place mentally- I know I will get to goal, I feel good about myself, I work out a LOT, and I also accept I am a human being in a human body, living the human condition and holidays are a time of food traditions and I will happily participate. This is new for me- the other few times I carbed it up since surgery I felt very gulty and beat myself up emotionally. I have never had any problem going right back to my plan though and I shifted only recently to forgiveness and moving forward. One great thing- I just can't eat that way day after day- it feels BAD. That is also new! I was worried the carbs would lead to carb craving but it's the reverse- I feel low energy after and am happy to return to my low carb high Protein ways.

We have our new tummies for life- we need to live in harmony with our bodies and our lives and oru wonderful tools can help us do that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I cheated on Thanksgiving (and the day after) too. My mom made this divine pumpkin roll, and I had to have a slice--with whipped cream! With my family, Thanksgiving is a day long even with a buffet of subs, dips, chips, and Desserts before the actual Thanksgiving feast! I can't physically eat as much as I used to be able to (like everyone else here!), but I definitely "ate around my sleeve" by grazing.

I feel guilty because I know better. I know that it's easy to gain back the weight if I don't watch myself. I just completely let go. And, it showed on the scale. I stalled- didn't gain any weight (luckily), but I didn't lose either.

The important thing is to stop and get back on track. It's all too easy to slip back into old habits (which is why I cheated the day after on leftovers). We indulged on a holiday, but we learned from our mistakes. We can do this :smile1:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I felt a bit guilty too because I love meat. I ate ham at least 5 times a day for three days straight and then had some dark meat turkey. Not a big sweets person so I did have a pre-surgery sized "bite" of pumpkin pie. Each time I had the ham, I also had my Mom's cornbread dressing. OMG soooooo delicious. I thought for sure I had put on 10 lbs but I weighed myself this morning and I LOST 3 more lbs!! No more guilt!

Even if I had stalled or gained, I would have been ok with it because it is ok to indulge once in a while as long as we do it infrequently.

Shae

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Here's my view on these surgeries. I did this for the restriction of how much I can eat, not for what I could eat. I eat whatever I feel like without guilt. I have candy, ice cream, Cookies, etc that are specifically mine. I have self control and can go a month without touching them, but if the craving comes I eat it. I refuse to deny myself treats. The key now is that I can have a bite and be satisfied instead of downing half a gallon of ice cream or half a loaf of french bread. I didn't do this surgery so I would have to be on a life long diet. I REFUSE to eat like I am on a diet.

Yes I go for Protein first, but it's not for a matter of dieting, it's a preference now because I got used to eating that way.

I also refuse to count calories, have never once counted them, nor Protein, nor carbs or anything else. If I have a week where the scale goes up, so what. We all fluctuate. If the scale bothers me, I just reevaluate my choices and go from there.

Don't beat yourself up for enjoying life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×