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My surgeon is retiring before my surgery :(



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I just got an office Memo today informing me that my surgeon is retiring next week, I work for the same organization he does. Only problem is I haven't had surgery yet!!!!!!!!!!!! I am on my 4th month of 6 mos of insurance required NUT appts so I haven't even been able to submit for approval yet. A couple things are going through my mind. First, no doctor announces their retirement a week before they actually do. Sounds like something else is going on there. Second, I feel really let down. When studying out this procedure he is the one I chose. He has 6000+procedures under his belt, he has been a surgeon for a little over 20yrs and works at a hospital recognized as a Bariatric Center of Weight loss excellence. He and a partner are the surgeons there. He has an excellent record. To top it off I trusted and liked him. Sounds crazy but I feel abandoned.

Only a few people know that I am working toward surgery. Since I have been losing weight and they are seeing results all of them separately have told me they think I can do it on my own and that I should reconsider surgery. None of them have weight problems. Even though I know in my heart I need to do this, I have been questioning myself. I almost feel like this is a sign I shouldn't have surgery. My mind is going a million miles a minute and my fingers can't keep up, sorry. I am not really seeking advice on this one just venting since I feel you guys might understand why I feel the way I do and no one around me does.

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Wow, I can imagine how abandoned you feel. It's really surprising - seems like he must have known for awhile, and it's odd he wouldn't have begun transitioning his practice to his partner. Perhaps he has a personal reason, like a very ill spouse or child?

I had to switch surgeons, and I found it to be an emotional experience. We're placing a lot of trust in these people when we put ourselves on their operating table. I think it's only natural to develop a feeling of a sort of bond, and it's pretty unsettling when that disappears without a warning.

As far as being able to do it on your own goes, that may be true. I thought the same thing as I went through the pre-op process. It's amazing what a low-carb diet and serious motivation will do for appetite control. The real question is, can you lose it and keep it off? I've been through several rounds of substantial weight loss, and the emotionally devastating regain. You don't want to be back here 5 years from now.

I'm so sorry this has happened to you.

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You must really feel lost. I am sorry for that . Surley he has worked some kind of contract with someone to take over his patients. I agree, something besides "retirement" is going on.

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That's not news anyone wants to hear once they've settled on a competent surgeon who they trust, but if he's being forced into retirement (and it sounds like that's a possibility) or if he's having major personal issues that might cause him to be distracted at work (another possibility) then maybe this is for the best. Luckily there is time for you to research and select another surgeon without the need to feel rushed.

I don't really believe in signs and signals, I think we make our own fate. I wouldn't let this bump in the road derail you from going through with the decision you've already made for yourself. You've made plans to change your life. You felt that those plans were for the betterment of your health and happiness, why should that change? Don't hang your future on the decisions made by someone else. If you really feel that you can make yourself healthy and happy and stay that way without using surgery as a tool, then by all means don't have the surgery! If you've exhausted all of your other options and you honestly feel that bariatric surgery is the only way to equip yourself with the tools you need to change your life, you owe it to yourself to go for it.

I know that you weren't soliciting advice in this situation, so I hope that I haven't offended you by offering my opinion. Good luck.

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I was kind of in a weird emotional state that day. Now that I have had a couple of days to think on things I feel better. I remember why I wanted to have the VSG in the first place and still want to go forward. I have lost and regained weight so many times I can barely keep count. I think I will check out the partner, I just don't know much about him yet. I have an appt at the end of the month. So until then, I will continue on and start the research phase again.

@JackieOMonroe: I am not offended at all. I really appreciate the input.

Thanks girls for the supportsmile.gif

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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