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Super Down But Don't Count Me Out



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Today I realized that I have completely isolated myself from everybody in my life. Not that I am Miss Popular with lots of friends, but those closest to me, my family. Its the first real holiday, the weather is beautiful and I am sitting here in the house feeling sorry for myself. I am not surprised I didnt receive any invites out. I have turned them down and faked them out so many times in the past that I would stop asking me too. My food addiction had me so wrapped up that I shut everybody out. All I needed was a pint of my caramel overload ice cream and I didnt need anything or anybody else. Even my daughter bailed on me today. Who wants to be stuck in the house with a boring fat mom???

I am so ready for this phase of my life to be over. I am ready to become who I really am. I am ready to live. Even tho I have been here all day, I have only eaten fruit. I am tired of losing to this thing. So even if I am not out with friends or fam (which would only really consist of pigging out and getting drunk) I still wont lose this battle. This addiction and lousy attitude can kiss my ass, because slowly but surely I AM WINNING!!!!

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Try not to be so hard on yourself...regardless if its weight, relationships, money, job etc, there are always things that we feel we could handle/manage better. It doesnt make you a loser if you having difficulties, it does however make you human. The fact that you recognize there is a part of your life that YOU think is lacking or is not where it could be, is a fantastic realization. The next step is to build the plan. Look at your outcome, say it out loud and write it down, then work backwards on how you get there. In your situation you may say, my outcome is that I regularly spend time with family/friends in social settings and truly enjoy myself. Now working backwards, how do you get there. Lets see, you would need to WANT to be more personable. But you can't be personable while you are self-conscious about your food addiction. looks like the food addiction needs to be kicked. How can you do that? Well there are a few ways, conventionally, fighting your cravings and eating more healthy (you are snacking on fruit, seems like a great start to me) and less conventionally, the VSG will allow you to be afforded a tool to help with your cravings, help you lose weight, help you disconnect your phantom hunger and emotions from binging or just eating the wrong things. Now of course I am simplifying this, but it doesnt HAVE to be difficult. The most difficult thing is striving for an outcome that you either A. dont know exactly what it is and/or B. not having a plan for attaining it. YOU CAN DO THIS and you have a BOARD full of people that will help and keep you accountable.

Dont give up hope and remember that this day, today, is Monday. Its Monday May 30th 2011. Its ONE SINGLE DAY in your life. The greatest part about this and every other day, its only 24 hours long and then you can (unless you are bill murray in groundhogs day) try it ALL over again tomorrow.

I have faith in you, now have faith in yourself and you are set!

Good luck!

JG

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I think JG is right!! I know exactly how you feel. I've done this for years, too. I will shut everyone out either because I allow my weight to define me or because the depression I feel is so heavy that I just can't fake being alright. It is so hard facing life sometimes and I'm sick of not wanting to face it. That's why I'm taking this journey. I'm worth it and so are you. I feel like I have been trapped in this body like a prison for years and until I escape it, I'll be at it's mercy! Give it to God...he already knows your pains and hurts!

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I hear you and feel your pain. Since my date was postponed last week I have been fighting major depression. Lol from Mrs. Positive. But I am ready to take my life back and this surgery will help me get there!!! I am walking in faith each day and even breath to breath sometimes. This is how we learn and grow. We will get there!!!! Hang in there and know we are with you!!!! Joan

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Thanks guys...I appreciate your encouragement!!! Joining here was the best decision I have made since deciding to sleeve!!

Joan, I hope you are feeling better...

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 1 reply
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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