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Scarred about my 1st after surgery psych appt.



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so here I am four plus months post op and I am going to see a psychologist cause my surgeon thinks I have an eating disorder cause I am afraid of food. does anyone blame me? I didn't get to 565lbs having a good relationship with food! so in a simple sentence I don't trust myself with food! I keep me eating very simple I don't try things that may taste good cause I don't wanna know I can eat it! I have about 12 foods I eat and that's it and that's all I need. I know I need to up my Protein cause I only get about 25-30grams a day and I need at least 70 grams cause my hair is beginning to let me know! as for my food I eat nothing but protein (pork ,chicken and beans). I know I have gotten really bad about calorie counting but like I said I will never trust myself with food! I told the nutritionist food is like when you have a bad relationship for years when it is over it is over, you want nothing to do with it she said that is a bad way to look at it and I said yeah right you weigh like 3lbs you have no Idea of what I have been through.. they say my attitude is negative I say it is not negative at life but toward them micro managing me and every time I see them they always make me feel terrible and unaccomplished. so back to the topic I am very nervous about this appt. because lately I have been trying to figure out why I got to be 565lbs and I though I knew why before surgery I thought I was just a gluten and over indulger but it turns out that may have been like 5% of it and I have no idea what the rest is. I know now when it comes to my eating I like the control factor of me being able to tell my body no and you can wait and having that control! I am so afraid of what they are gonna pull out of me and I am scarred of breaking down cause I wanna be strong not weak but this today is really gonna test me. sorry for venting but I am nervous, scarred and confused....

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I'm sure you are confused ... we all have a variety of reasons why we became overweight. Thankfully, you are not alone in that!

Did you meet with this person prior to surgery? If so, how did you get along? If good, try to think of this as an opportunity to grow and learn more about yourself. You can't stay with 12 foods for the rest of your life. You didn't have surgery to be a prisoner to food (you already were that).

If you did see them & did not get along, do you have options for another person to see? It will take some time to figure out what is going on with you and your emotions/thoughts. You need to find someone you can trust & really talk to about your fears and concerns.

Good luck! Keep us posted. I'm routing for you!!!!!

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First of all, congratulations on your amazing weight loss!

I'll agree with mini-me on this as well, we each have our own mental issues and past life experience that have led us to have a bad relationship with food. I, personally, am a control freak and I can see why limiting to 12 foods would be very comforting, especially when you are getting good results. The fact is, there probably is something else you need to explore psychologically. The best thing you can do is be honest with the therapist about it. Tell them if you feel panicked or cornered, or whatever. A good therapist will work with you on that, but you have to be honest with them. Also, asking them to help you with those feelings will minimize the "bad attitude" label they have put on you.

In fact, you may want to consider changing to a new therapist if they are labeling you that way. My mother has a psychology degree and she said that a good therapist should never judge you in that way, only work with you to help explore your feelings and problems. Give the therapist a chance - be honest about your concerns. It will take more than one session to get to the bottom of what is going on, no matter what.

Try to relax, and good luck!

Lara

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I say don' be scared of seeing a psychologist. She may be the best thing for you. There are too many people out there who need help and don't get it because they figure they can handle it themselves (I know of few of them) or because they think it's for crazy people. I say dive in, open up and let them help you figure it out. Take it step by step. We all have our reasons for having gotten big. I think you're strong because you're doing it for you. To make yourself a better and a whole person in the long run. Take it one day at a time. Don't be afraid to open up.

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I'm actually seeing a psychologist pre-op on the recommendation of the psychologist I saw for my eval. I was pretty nervous, but it has helped a LOT!!! I'm 5 days from having my surgery and I'm really feeling like all I need help with now is getting rid of my gigantic stomach!! We're still dealing with ongoing problems in my life, but I can clearly see the triggers I used to respond to by overeating and I'm ready to do battle with the help of my sleeve!!

Don't be scared! You'll be surprised how much better you'll feel getting things figured out!! GL, hon!

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Well it never hurts to get help, but I must admit I have limitted food intake after surgery. I keep a routine just because it is easy and allows me control.

I start every day with a Protein shake, I have greek yogurt for a snack, chicken for lunch and chicken for dinner. I mix it up with what kind of chicken I have and veggies. Hmm maybe tonight I live it up and have some red meat!

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Have you thought about using Protein supplements? That would give you your protein- because you could become malnourished and sick if you continue to ignore the importance of nutrition. I would hate to see you end up in the hospital on an iv.

Another wonderful resource would be to use one of the online food logging sites- I loge my food through fatsecret.com - their food lists is incredibly large and includes almost anything you can think of- and when you put it in you daily log it immediately tells you carbs, Protein, fat, calories- Vitamins, minerals- everything.. It helps you feel in control and not afraid.

Are you taking Vitamins and minerals and drinking your Water? Please do that for your health!

As for the psychiatrist or nutritionist? Dump her! You need to feel totally comfortable with a therapist and you have the right to fire this one.

Good luck to you on this journey.

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Great response! Agree. We are all routing for you as we've all been there someway or another.

I'm sure you are confused ... we all have a variety of reasons why we became overweight. Thankfully, you are not alone in that!

Did you meet with this person prior to surgery? If so, how did you get along? If good, try to think of this as an opportunity to grow and learn more about yourself. You can't stay with 12 foods for the rest of your life. You didn't have surgery to be a prisoner to food (you already were that).

If you did see them & did not get along, do you have options for another person to see? It will take some time to figure out what is going on with you and your emotions/thoughts. You need to find someone you can trust & really talk to about your fears and concerns.

Good luck! Keep us posted. I'm routing for you!!!!!

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Have you tried powders?utm_source=BariatricPal&utm_medium=Affiliate&utm_campaign=CommentLink" target="_ad" data-id="1" >unjury unflavoured Protein? I actually think its great and I add it to Soups to increase my Protein intake for the day.

Maybe seeing the psycologist to see if you can work out your other issues you have and if you do not like this one ask to see another until you feel comfortable with the psycologist. This is only my 2cents. I do hope you find a way to get in more protein.

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I really hope you take this in the spirit it's intended, as I have been in your shoes. I just want to suggest the possibility that you do have a "bad attitude" (though that kind of judge-y language is not productive) and that you are very angry, and you are constantly turning the rage on yourself, except when a therapist makes a convenient target of themselves as this one did.

All I'm saying is, consider leaning into the negative instead of being scared of it. Running from it...or trying to suppress it through hyper-controlling your food intake, will not ever make it go away.

Consider that opening up that can of worms may be difficult and painful, but it may lead to real breakthroughs. Actual happiness and self-acceptance instead of treating yourself like an unreformed criminal who can't be trusted with the silver.

Hugs, you can do this.

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I am no expert. But I found myself so stressed since surgery because it was my coping skill for stress and now it was removed. I went back to the psychologist that did my pre op to help me deal with it. I am so glad I did it is so much easier to unload to a stranger. Do it!

pat

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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