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Hi, sorry to barge on but I have a question....I'm not AA, but my husband is & he looooves a thick girl. He totally supports my choice & took off 3 weeks to take care of me & our 4 kids (since I'm a SAHM) & I know that he loves me no matter what......but as my 44H's are deflating & my ass is shrinking I keep feeling like if I lose too much weight he might not find me as appealing. The other day I put on some new jeans & asked "how do these look?" because they felt a little tight & he said "you look narrow....and I don't like it". He said it jokingly & it didn't upset me but there is always some truth to what people say when they're "kidding". Has anyone else been through this? I feel like its kind of the opposite for ladies married to white dudes, but maybe I'm wrong. I'd really appreciate any feedback. Thanks!!

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Ummm any responses lol....smh

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Lol...Smh!

Little bits

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Ummm any responses lol....smh

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Hi, sorry to barge on but I have a question....I'm not AA, but my husband is & he looooves a thick girl. He totally supports my choice & took off 3 weeks to take care of me & our 4 kids (since I'm a SAHM) & I know that he loves me no matter what......but as my 44H's are deflating & my ass is shrinking I keep feeling like if I lose too much weight he might not find me as appealing. The other day I put on some new jeans & asked "how do these look?" because they felt a little tight & he said "you look narrow....and I don't like it". He said it jokingly & it didn't upset me but there is always some truth to what people say when they're "kidding". Has anyone else been through this? I feel like its kind of the opposite for ladies married to white dudes, but maybe I'm wrong. I'd really appreciate any feedback. Thanks!!

Hey Kayte - I worry about this with my husband but it's funny. As big as I am, I have smaller boobs (barely a D cup) and definitely suffer from noassatall. I'm hoping and praying that slimming down and exercising will give me some curves. Anyway, I know I don't want to get too thin because he just doesn't like really thin girls...everyone has their preferences. I would say, just make the most of whatever you have left. Show him what the thinner body can do that the "thicker" one could. ;) The different clothes you'll be able to wear...things like that.

Reading this board and looking through before/after pics, it seems that most of the women kept their overall body shape. If you start off curvy, you'll likely stay curvy but just with smaller proportions. I'm a square, so I need to make some curves! LOL

And a bit of a tangent, this whole "I'm thick" movement has done us a bit of a disservice if you ask me as far as health. Many of us passed up "thick" many, many pounds ago (myself included!!). LOL It's great to have fabulous self-esteem no matter your size, I admire women like that...but we have to be honest with ourselves that our health is in danger.

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Anyone else worried about loosing too much weight and not meeting the standards of what our husbands, boyfriends and other black men think is attractive?

I'll be honest, I am.

I wonder what will happen to my boobies. I currently wear a 36 F and am worried about how they'll look afterward. I probably will ask for a breast reduction.

Also I'm an apple shape so I'm worried that I'll just be a smaller, loose skinned version of my bigger self.

Crazy right?

USMCWife,

I see you are over a year out now & wondered if I could get an update from you as far as how your husband has handled it. I would really appreciate it. Thanks!

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Hey Kayte - I worry about this with my husband but it's funny. As big as I am, I have smaller boobs (barely a D cup) and definitely suffer from noassatall. I'm hoping and praying that slimming down and exercising will give me some curves. Anyway, I know I don't want to get too thin because he just doesn't like really thin girls...everyone has their preferences. I would say, just make the most of whatever you have left. Show him what the thinner body can do that the "thicker" one could. ;) The different clothes you'll be able to wear...things like that.

Reading this board and looking through before/after pics, it seems that most of the women kept their overall body shape. If you start off curvy, you'll likely stay curvy but just with smaller proportions. I'm a square, so I need to make some curves! LOL

And a bit of a tangent, this whole "I'm thick" movement has done us a bit of a disservice if you ask me as far as health. Many of us passed up "thick" many, many pounds ago (myself included!!). LOL It's great to have fabulous self-esteem no matter your size, I admire women like that...but we have to be honest with ourselves that our health is in danger.

Thank you, BK for your response! I agree about the thick movement not being great for our health, but I'm also thankful for it as it saved me from ever having any dating / self-esteem issues ;) And you're right, most women do keep their shape so fingers crossed to keep my curves!! Thanks again.

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Im all about health first. Being thick doesnt always equate to unhealthy. I also realize that not everyones thick is the same. A YT video I watched showed women who the creater thought was thick, and a woman no bigger than 150 lbs at about 5"7 was considered thick. I dont really use the term to describe a persons physique its too varying. I do get the point you are trying to make though.

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Hello all. I'm a 37 AA female sleeved on 4/24/12. Can anyone share their experience with gas? How long did it take you to get past that, if ever? What were your techniques for relieving the trapped gas? Did Shapewear or compression garment help? I also had a hiatal hernia repair and I'm super tender on the.right side. Anyone have a similar experience?

Sent from my HTC Evo 4G using VST

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Hello all. I'm a 37 AA female sleeved on 4/24/12. Can anyone share their experience with gas? How long did it take you to get past that' date=' if ever? What were your techniques for relieving the trapped gas? Did Shapewear or compression garment help? I also had a hiatal hernia repair and I'm super tender on the.right side. Anyone have a similar experience?

Sent from my HTC Evo 4G using VST[/quote']

Mine finally disappeared mid second week. I just walked and took gas x strips. I was scared to wear any type of body shapewear cause of my incisions.

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Didn't really think it was a funny question.....Guess you guys do tho......

I laughed because, in my opinion, it was ridiculous & a tad bit offensive. For some reason, I'm thinking that others may have felt the same way...which is why there were very few responses. Moving on...

Little bits

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I laughed because, in my opinion, it was ridiculous & a tad bit offensive. For some reason, I'm thinking that others may have felt the same way...which is why there were very few responses. Moving on...

Little bits

Ditto

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Hi y'all , I am nadoue, was sleeved on sept 14,2011. So far, my sleeve is a miracle, lost a total of 60 lbs, size 8 but I can fit in smaller one if I chose to. I am Haitian no need to tell you how concern I was so did my doc. However, my blender become my best friend and even my health care team is amazed. I wear my hear natural, no Hair loss truly, I used all organic product on them, lean body Protein to make sure that I have enough daily, it's 30 g each pack, lots of Fluid and yeah, I drink lots of lemonade. Don't ask me why the lemonade, just craving. If you are on birth control, ask for the lowest dose coz you won't gain a lot of wt. I am still losing but I am just trying not to. Hope this help!

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Kayte819 I agree with you, culturally speaking black men do like a "thick" woman whereas white men do not. It's only natural to be concerned about his reaction to how your body is changing he is your husband after all. Maybe he has concerns of his own that he hasn't voiced like being concerned about the attention you may get from other men as you continue to lose weight. I would encourage you to express your concerns about his comment just to give you both a chance to talk about the changes you're experiencing. I hate you were made to feel like your question "was funny" because it was a true concern for you and no one should be made fun of. I mean, that's why we're all here in the first place. To obtain encouragement and support in an enviornment that doesn't judge us for superficial reasons such as our weight or our color. Just saying....

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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