Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Recommended Posts

Is anybody else worry about what weight loss is going to do to their marriage? I have a pretty solid marriage now, but I'm not sure if is going to be able to handle other people paying more attention to me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You are unsure if YOU can handle all the attention or your partner? I have a pretty solid marriage but yeah I wonder how it may change.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wonder about this topic with me and my bf.

I have a feeling it won't go well, but am determined to make it work. i think that if the surgery is a success, i won't be able to resist temptation as horrible as that sounds

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My husband told me the other night "No getting skinny, then finding another man." I just laughed and told him "Not happening, I already put 10 years into you... I am not starting over with hey, what is your favorite color" haha. Seriously though, he should be happy for you. You will be healthier and feel better and want to do more "things" with him. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

As long as I don't pay attention to the other people paying attention (cross fingers that it happens someday), I don't think it will be a problem. But I've been married forever.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

And those "things" are so much more fun as you approach goal and feel better about your body!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My husband told me the other night "No getting skinny, then finding another man." I just laughed and told him "Not happening, I already put 10 years into you... I am not starting over with hey, what is your favorite color" haha. Seriously though, he should be happy for you. You will be healthier and feel better and want to do more "things" with him. :)

Just a note to say my husband said the same thing. I think he is a little nervous about it all. My surgerie is next week. This is my second marriage, we have been married almost 4 years, and I am 55 years old. I NEVER want to start over again. They will just have to trust us, Take care! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Typically, it's an insecurity within him, and not an issue with the wife unless she starts acting on that attention from other men. At least that has been my experience, I got attention when I was fat so my husband didn't really have any major issues with me getting more attention. He was a little jealous when he first came home from his deployment, but that's pretty typical reintergration behavior for military members that are gone for long periods of time.

My marriage was solid pre-op, and it's more solid today. We discussed our concerns long before I had my band, and he was deployed during my revision. We shared our concerns, and we also really thought about all the pros and cons. He was always proud of me, but now when the guys at work say "man, your wife is looking super hot", he simply smiles and says " thanks, she's worked hard to achieve her goal".

We did go through a little bout of him being the food police when I continued to lose below goal, but I just had to explain it to very simply and very matter of fact. Any concerns he has had, we've discussed. Communication is KEY.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

We talked some yesterday. He still thinks that I should try to lose weight on my own. I did before, why can't I do it again. He thinks that I am going to change after losing weight. I told him I will be more confident, but that is not going to change how I feel about him. We have been together for 8 years and have been through a lot and this is just going to be a new adventure. Going out to dinner is what both love to do. We will have to learn new things to do together. I think going to the gym would be something we can do together or going for walks in the evening with our girls.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am sure, that so many of us change. We will become more confident. And it is easier to get out of a bad relationship, when you have more selfesteem. BUT - beware of the honeymoon fase. I have read a lot about people, who feel like teenagers again - need to kiss a lot of new people :-) So if you ar ein a good relationsship it is good to be aware of this honeymoonfase.

Suddenly we like our bodies again, and other do as well.

I am concerned myself.... Havent had the operation yet.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I worry about the same situation, but I look at it as a positive thing. If other people are paying more attention won't that make hubby pay more attention? I was 130lbs and a size 6-8 when we started dating. Almost 6 years and 2 kids later I am 237lbs and a size 18-20.. I have told him that when the weight is gone surely the sex drive will show back up, and it would be better for us both. LoL My marriage is solid, and I know with weight loss things change, but I think if it changes it will be for the better..

Quick question you have Aetna did you submit on the 1st if so how quickly did they approve? I finish my 6 months in November and then submit!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At this point, I've put waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much into this marriage for anything to destroy it!

LOL.

I always tell my hubby that I'm going to trade him in though, it's a joke we have!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Stone Art By SKL

      Decorative Wall Cladding & Panels | Stone Art By SKL
      Elevate your space with Stone Art By SKL's decorative wall claddings & panels. Explore premium designs for timeless elegance.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Losing my hair in clumps and still dealing with "stomach" issues from gallbladder removal surgery. On the positive side I'm doing better about meeting protein and water goals and taking my vitamins, so yay? 🤷‍♀️
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Mr.Kantos

      Just signed up. Feeling optimistic.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Frugal

      Welcome to Frugal Testing, where we are committed to revolutionizing the software testing landscape with our efficient and affordable solutions. As a pioneering company in this field, we understand the challenges faced by startups, small to medium-sized businesses and any organization working without budget constraints. Our mission is to deliver top-notch testing services that ensure the highest quality of software, all while keeping your costs in check.
      Frugal Testing offers a comprehensive suite of testing services tailored to meet diverse needs. Specializing in different types of testing including functional testing, automation testing, metaverse testing and D365 testing, we cover all bases to guarantee thorough software quality assurance. Our approach is not just about identifying bugs; it's about ensuring a seamless and superior user experience.
      Innovation is at the heart of what we do. By integrating the latest tools and technologies, many of which are cutting-edge open source solutions, we stay ahead in delivering efficient and effective testing services. This approach allows us to provide exceptional quality testing without the high costs typically associated with advanced testing methodologies.
      Understanding each client's unique needs is fundamental to our service delivery. At Frugal Testing, the focus is on creating customized testing strategies that align with specific business goals and budget requirements. This client-centric approach ensures that every testing solution is not only effective but also fully aligned with the client's objectives.
      Our team is our greatest asset. Composed of skilled professionals who are experts in the latest testing techniques and technologies, they bring dedication, expertise and a commitment to excellence in every project. This expertise ensures that our client’s software not only meets but often exceeds the highest standards of quality and performance.
      Frugal Testing is more than just a service provider; we are a partner in your success. With a blend of quality, innovation and cost-effectiveness, we are here to help you navigate the complexities of software testing, ensuring your product stands out in today's competitive market. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×