Is anybody else worry about what weight loss is going to do to their marriage? I have a pretty solid marriage now, but I'm not sure if is going to be able to handle other people paying more attention to me.

You are unsure if YOU can handle all the attention or your partner? I have a pretty solid marriage but yeah I wonder how it may change.

I wonder about this topic with me and my bf.

I have a feeling it won't go well, but am determined to make it work. i think that if the surgery is a success, i won't be able to resist temptation as horrible as that sounds

My husband told me the other night "No getting skinny, then finding another man." I just laughed and told him "Not happening, I already put 10 years into you... I am not starting over with hey, what is your favorite color" haha. Seriously though, he should be happy for you. You will be healthier and feel better and want to do more "things" with him.

As long as I don't pay attention to the other people paying attention (cross fingers that it happens someday), I don't think it will be a problem. But I've been married forever.

And those "things" are so much more fun as you approach goal and feel better about your body!

My husband told me the other night "No getting skinny, then finding another man." I just laughed and told him "Not happening, I already put 10 years into you... I am not starting over with hey, what is your favorite color" haha. Seriously though, he should be happy for you. You will be healthier and feel better and want to do more "things" with him.

Just a note to say my husband said the same thing. I think he is a little nervous about it all. My surgerie is next week. This is my second marriage, we have been married almost 4 years, and I am 55 years old. I NEVER want to start over again. They will just have to trust us, Take care!

Typically, it's an insecurity within him, and not an issue with the wife unless she starts acting on that attention from other men. At least that has been my experience, I got attention when I was fat so my husband didn't really have any major issues with me getting more attention. He was a little jealous when he first came home from his deployment, but that's pretty typical reintergration behavior for military members that are gone for long periods of time.

My marriage was solid pre-op, and it's more solid today. We discussed our concerns long before I had my band, and he was deployed during my revision. We shared our concerns, and we also really thought about all the pros and cons. He was always proud of me, but now when the guys at work say "man, your wife is looking super hot", he simply smiles and says " thanks, she's worked hard to achieve her goal".

We did go through a little bout of him being the food police when I continued to lose below goal, but I just had to explain it to very simply and very matter of fact. Any concerns he has had, we've discussed. Communication is KEY.

We talked some yesterday. He still thinks that I should try to lose weight on my own. I did before, why can't I do it again. He thinks that I am going to change after losing weight. I told him I will be more confident, but that is not going to change how I feel about him. We have been together for 8 years and have been through a lot and this is just going to be a new adventure. Going out to dinner is what both love to do. We will have to learn new things to do together. I think going to the gym would be something we can do together or going for walks in the evening with our girls.

And a side note I told him that one of the side effects is increased sex drive. Lol

I am sure, that so many of us change. We will become more confident. And it is easier to get out of a bad relationship, when you have more selfesteem. BUT - beware of the honeymoon fase. I have read a lot about people, who feel like teenagers again - need to kiss a lot of new people :-) So if you ar ein a good relationsship it is good to be aware of this honeymoonfase.

Suddenly we like our bodies again, and other do as well.

I am concerned myself.... Havent had the operation yet.

I worry about the same situation, but I look at it as a positive thing. If other people are paying more attention won't that make hubby pay more attention? I was 130lbs and a size 6-8 when we started dating. Almost 6 years and 2 kids later I am 237lbs and a size 18-20.. I have told him that when the weight is gone surely the sex drive will show back up, and it would be better for us both. LoL My marriage is solid, and I know with weight loss things change, but I think if it changes it will be for the better..

Quick question you have Aetna did you submit on the 1st if so how quickly did they approve? I finish my 6 months in November and then submit!!!

It took me 48 hours to get a response back from Aetna. It was quick. I got the letter within a week.

At this point, I've put waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much into this marriage for anything to destroy it!

LOL.

I always tell my hubby that I'm going to trade him in though, it's a joke we have!