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Do you regret surgery and miss eating bigger meals?



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I went through this struggle this weekend. We had our family reunion and it's pretty much an October version of Thanksgiving for us. This was the first time that I wasn't able to stuff myself to the gills with everyone else and at first, I was kind of down about it. However, I just took a spoonful of the things I wanted to eat the most. My brother commented that it must suck not being able to gorge myself, but after eating, I was the same type of full that I was before the surgery. And I became okay with it. Then the Desserts came out and I thought "oh hell." I was getting down again about not being able to eat a slice of all five cakes, but then I just ate a bite fro two cakes and I was good to go.

I think I'm starting to get used to this :)

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Let me explain a little...I am very happy about my weight loss--and truthfully, after having lost a lot of weight on a variety of diets in the past, I can honestly say that this is the easiest 70 pounds that I have ever lost. My concern is that a big portion of the weight that I have lost was in the first 3 months. I have only lost 3 pounds in the last month. Even that is better than nothing, but I still weigh 213 pounds, and I have a lot more weight that I would like to lose. I'm scared/disappointed because in the last 2 months, the amount that I can eat has increased significantly, my appetite has increased, and my weightloss has slowed to a crawl. If I were closer to a reasonable goal weight, I would be less concerned about that--but it feels like the reduction in the amount of restriction that I feel is happening too soon.

When I compare the amount of food that I am able to eat to what others in my family are eating, it seems to me that I can eat almost normal sized adult portions. That definitely was not the case 2 months ago. I'm afraid that if this pattern continues, that at the end of a year or two, I will not have enough restriction to prevent me from overeating, and I don't want to lose that.

Even so, if I didn't lose another pound, I would have no regrets about having had the surgery. My health and the quality of my life have improved dramatically. I just got back from a 5 day vacation with my children and grandchildren. I walked all over the mountains and had more energy than anyone else on the trip. Prior to VSG, I rarely left the house because I was so tired and my feet hurt so bad.

This surgery has given me the opportunity to live well and enjoy life again. It has also returned to me a sense of dignity and self-control. Even though I wish a had a little more restriction, at this point, I still have enough restriction to help me eat small portions and refrain from over eating. I'm being careful to avoid eating past the point of comfort (I haven't thrown up once) because I don't want to do anything to cause my sleeve to stretch/expand. I want the freedom this has given me to last forever!

I loved your post. The experience w/ your children and grandchildren touched a cord w/ me. A year ago I weighed 246 lbs. My daughter and her husband took my 4 grandkids on their first trip to Disney World. I wanted to go so badly and offered to pay my own way so I could share the experience. Although my daughter wanted me to be with them, she said that I could not go because this was the only trip they could probably ever afford and she had it scheduled very tightly so they could get the most bang for their buck! She said that I could not keep up with them and might cause them to miss some events. As much as it hurt to hear that, I new she was right. Right then I vowed never to go through that again and miss important moments in life. I started the sleeve process. It was a long frustrating journey with the insurance, but after losing 50 lbs on my own, I was sleeved 2 weeks ago!! I have absolutely no regrets. I have lost 7 lbs in 2 weeks and need to lose at least 50 more. I have a new granddaughter and am excited by the thought that she will never know a "fat" grandmother!!! I think my weight loss will also be fairly slow, but "slow and steady wins the race!" God bless you and thanks for the encouragement. Enjoy those grandkids!!!

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I am going to be scheduled for my surgery on Wednesday and I have often wondered the same thing. food is such a big factor in our lifestyle and I guess that a part of me is scared of losing that lifestyle. Another part of me is that I will not be able to sit down and enjoy a family dinner with my family. I know that I am going to be happy with my sleeve but you when you loose those comforts that food and the food lifestyle bring, it is kinda scary to me. I can only speak of my part and my fears. With that being said, I embrace the challenges that will be coming ahead.

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Thanks Skeebo! I haven't been on the forum much lately because with my grandchildren living with me, I stay so busy, that I can't find much time to be on the computer. I just took the kids hiking in the Suwannee River State Park today. Imagine that! The grandma that couldn't even hobble down to the shoreline to play at the beach a year ago because her feet hurt so bad, is now hiking! I love it! Congratulations on your sleeve surgery, and on the new granddaughter! I wish us both many more years of being healty, active grandmas!

Kathy

I loved your post. The experience w/ your children and grandchildren touched a cord w/ me. A year ago I weighed 246 lbs. My daughter and her husband took my 4 grandkids on their first trip to Disney World. I wanted to go so badly and offered to pay my own way so I could share the experience. Although my daughter wanted me to be with them, she said that I could not go because this was the only trip they could probably ever afford and she had it scheduled very tightly so they could get the most bang for their buck! She said that I could not keep up with them and might cause them to miss some events. As much as it hurt to hear that, I new she was right. Right then I vowed never to go through that again and miss important moments in life. I started the sleeve process. It was a long frustrating journey with the insurance, but after losing 50 lbs on my own, I was sleeved 2 weeks ago!! I have absolutely no regrets. I have lost 7 lbs in 2 weeks and need to lose at least 50 more. I have a new granddaughter and am excited by the thought that she will never know a "fat" grandmother!!! I think my weight loss will also be fairly slow, but "slow and steady wins the race!" God bless you and thanks for the encouragement. Enjoy those grandkids!!!

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The only thing I regret about the surgery is not having it sooner. Sometimes I feel a little left out if everyone around me is eating a huge meal. I think that is one of my own personal psych issues. I think it’s important not to feel too deprived. I know that for me feeling deprived pre-surgery almost always resulted in a binge. I still enjoy eating. I try to focus in on the quality and not the quantity!

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I am nine months out. The VSG is the best thing I ever did for myself. I have NO REGRETS. Sure, eating out is a bit boring now because i am finished eating waaay before anyone else at the table. Sure, I miss eating big meals sometimes but those meals were the reason I was fat! I definitely do not miss that. I had no "off" switch. I just kept eating!

I used to go to bed at night with thoughts about a new tomorrow and a plan to eat healthy. I used to wake in the morning with a food hangover and another pound gained on the scale. Before I knew it, no matter how good my intentions, I was making poor choices and kicking myself the rest of the day. So, the cycle would repeat over and over.

My husband was against me having the surgery and that made it difficult for me to go through with it. But, I did it . . . with his reluctant blessing. He tells me, "I didn't know I had a say in the matter!"

Now, I am free. Forever! I am so relieved. I am so grateful I had this opportunity. I wish I would have done it sooner!

My husband agrees it was the right choice for me. He tells me he could not bear to go through it again but he sees the positive effect it has had on me. Forget about the weight loss . . . (YAY ME) . . . he sees that I am finally free (I know, I already said that but it is soooo how I feel) and I am finally at peace! Never again will I be CONSUMED with constant , pervasive thoughts about my weight. I AM FREE! (Last time, i promise.) Now, I get to stress about real stuff! Crazy.

Jilly :)

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Thank you to everyone for your replies. I had the surgery and am doing fine. Like most, the first couple of weeks were the hardest. I have lost 24 lbs. in six weeks - not as much as a lot of people but I'll happily take it. I have read how many people start exercising and I wanted no part of that. But am feeling like I really need to do some toning up and actually am looking forward to doing something soon. Again, thanks so much to everyone for sharing your experiences with me. It truly helps.

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I am only 1.5 weeks out of surgery, so I can't speak to the "do you miss eating like a man" issue, although already I am DELIGHTED not to be a serial eater anymore... however, I can give you a little information on the "long term success" of the procedure.

My research finds that they first started doing Vertical Gastric Sleeves as the first step in a Gastric Bypass or Switch, in dangerously obese people to reduce their weight first. This was back in the 1980's, and I believe that back then, these procedures were OPEN. From what I read, in many cases, the sleeve worked so well that the patients never came back for the rest of the surgery.

I also find that the first laproscopic VGS in the US was performed by Dr. Michael Gagner, in year 2000, at NY Presbyterian Hospital. Dr. Gagner is a Canadian surgeon, who pioneered in a lot of laproscopic WLS techniques. They have been doing this procedure at NYP ever since... and as my surgeon there said to me, "Nobody has ever come in and asked for their stomach back, yet."

As far as complications, all surgery has risks, and this one is no different. It IS a major surgery, even if done laproscopically, but the risks descend sharply with each passing week. After three months out, you are past the stage where you will get a blood clot from the surgery itself. As time goes on, your risk for leaks goes down. and if you follow the doc's instructions to the tee, and pass your swallow test, you'll probaby be ok there too. I think that for some people, nausea is a problem, and for others pain, but you can work with your doc to control those two until they finally go away.

My husband is also completely opposed to this surgery, and we had a big fight over it, but I went ahead anyway.. and now... a week-and-a-half later, he sees that I survived, am getting better each day, and have lnow lost 18 pounds... he is shutting up.

Only YOU can decide which you love more.... the taste of food, or the feeling of being thin and healthy. Good luck with it! I know that I am certainly not looking back.

Cinderella

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So, I'm four weeks out today. And I'd say that I'd do this again in a heartbeat. I am THRILLED with how I look, and how much better I feel to be thinner and able to move my body better. I miss this body (I've now lost 5 years; i.e. pants that I last wore 5 years ago). I love dressing well again, and taking care of myself....

...But eating it a chore. A lot of foods that are good for me don't slide, and I feel lousy afterwards. I'm not drinking or eating enough of the right things. There's time when I'm out and about and crave the simplicity of a quick piece of pizza. I really miss the way that I could satisfy my hunger easily. It shocking how much of our modern diet is junk carbs, for example it's almost impossible to eat 4 weeks post op in an airport terminal. But I always remember Tiffany's rejoinder that there's nothing that you can put in your mouth that tastes as good as feeling thinner feels. So, while its not all roses all the time, its way more good than bad. And getting a bit better daily.

Matt

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I am supposed to have my surgery later this month. My husband is totally opposed. He thinks I will struggle to live with the changes I will need to make to my lifestyle. He also questions what the long term effects of the surgery may be. I wonder if people who have been post op for more than a year hate the fact that they can no longer eat more than one piece of pizza or a Christmas turkey dinner (even if the portions are very small it would be impossible to have a taste of everything including dessert). Do you have regrets? If you had it to do over would you still do it? Is it worth the many sacrifices you have to make? I am flip flopping a dozen times a day - should I or should I not have the surgery!! I have about 50 lbs to lose. Would appreciate any help you can give me. Thanks very much.

progress.gif

I have never, never, NEVER had "buyer's remorse" - not for one second!!! I enjoy every single bite of food I take, I just take much fewer, and there is nothing that tastes as good as slipping into a size eight feels; of having and seeing collar bones - I promise you that!!! I eat ONE piece of pizza, I CHOOSE the smallest but a normal size piece so I can eat the crust, my favorite part....and I enjoy it. There were times when I'd split a large with my husband. OMG Now he doesn't eat that much any more either!!

I do not feel that I have made ANY sacrifices at all. At Thanksgiving I had a few bites of everything and for the first time in MY LIFE I left the table satisfied, not stuffed. You have no idea how wonderful that feels. I was in control, I'm in the drivers seat. I have not been hungry since the day of my surgery, I love it. I eat because it tastes good and because I know I need to. I love the social aspect of eating just like before. I still love the smell....sweets don't taste as good, pumpkin bread from Star Bucks is now my favorite dessert. Choc pie didn't taste good at all at Thanksgiving....I was thankful!! LOL I reached goal in just under five months, I didn't have anything sweet until then I had no idea that my tastes had changed. It was so weird! Anyway......I'd do it again in a heartbeat....it's the best decision I've ever made for myself!!

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So, I'm four weeks out today. And I'd say that I'd do this again in a heartbeat. I am THRILLED with how I look, and how much better I feel to be thinner and able to move my body better. I miss this body (I've now lost 5 years; i.e. pants that I last wore 5 years ago). I love dressing well again, and taking care of myself....

...But eating it a chore. A lot of foods that are good for me don't slide, and I feel lousy afterwards. I'm not drinking or eating enough of the right things. There's time when I'm out and about and crave the simplicity of a quick piece of pizza. I really miss the way that I could satisfy my hunger easily. It shocking how much of our modern diet is junk carbs, for example it's almost impossible to eat 4 weeks post op in an airport terminal. But I always remember Tiffany's rejoinder that there's nothing that you can put in your mouth that tastes as good as feeling thinner feels. So, while its not all roses all the time, its way more good than bad. And getting a bit better daily.

Matt

Hey Matt - Tiffany is right....nothing tastes as good as being thin feels!! I literally have a new wardrobe.....donated 8 13 gallon bags of clothes to Good Will.

I just wanted to give you a hint on eating at the airport. Wendy's chili. Check it out, low in calories, fat, Sat. fat....everything. No way you can eat all of it, but it's a life saver at the airport. I am pretty sure that I ate it at four weeks, but all surgeons are different. Just an FYI.

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I am glad that you shared your experience about the quantity of food you cn now eat. I ma so looking forward to that! I find it reallty interesting that you can now "taste" how bad the foods you used to eat.

Browse the threads on this forum for a while and you'll see one theme: regardless of the changes, regardless of any complications, almost everyone LOVES their sleeve.

I've been reading on this forum for more than a year and while people get grouchy or down a bit if they stall out for a while (which is a normal part of the process), they always come out on the other side glowing and gushing about how much they love their sleeve.

I'm only eight weeks out, but I can tell you that there are changes you have to learn to live with, but I think they're all GOOD changes.

I cannot sit down and eat an entire king size Snickers followed by half a pint of ice cream followed by a few handfuls of chips when I'm expecting my period. And boy, I used to. Like, every day for the entire week before my cycle.

I cannot sit down in my favorite German restaurant and eat several brotchen, followed by a huge Jagerschnitzel, spaetzle and a huge helping of rotkohl. Oh, and who could forget the hazelnut cake and coffee when that was done?

I cannot eat a dozen chicken wings and half a pizza like I used to, either.

Do I miss being able to eat large quantities? Not in the way you'd think. Overindulging like I used to do in the past made me fat and unhappy. Don't get me wrong, I LOVED that overstuffed, rebellious feeling that overinduling gave me.

But these days, I'd just like to be able to fit in a full half cup of eggbeaters. Not because I want to eat more, because with the exception of PMS, the desire to eat is GONE. But mainly because I'd just like to be able to get in my calories and Protein for the day, without feeling like all I do is eat.

Yeah...I'm complaining because I feel like I'm eating all the time.

Your life will change post op. You will not eat the way you used to eat. Yes, you might feel a few parting pangs when you realize it's simply not possible.

But I think your happiness at being in control of your food demons, the ability to control your portions without feeling deprived and the resulting weight loss will FAR outweigh any disappointment you might feel because you can't eat until you're bloated.

I can have one slice of pizza made on a super thin crust and it's completely satisfying. Actually...it's not. It was a bit of a letdown. I took the first bite and actually asked my husband, "You like this pizza?" because all I could taste was processed cheese and grease. I can't belive I used to eat half a pizza. Foods do not taste the same to me, and I far prefer fresh foods over processed ones these days.

You don't have as much weight to lose as some folks, but there are lightweights on this board. I'd check with them before you opt to have surgery, so that you can draw on their experiences as well.

Sorry to ramble on. Good luck to you no matter what you decide.

~Cheri

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Hey Matt - Tiffany is right....nothing tastes as good as being thin feels!! I literally have a new wardrobe.....donated 8 13 gallon bags of clothes to Good Will.

I just wanted to give you a hint on eating at the airport. Wendy's chili. Check it out, low in calories, fat, Sat. fat....everything. No way you can eat all of it, but it's a life saver at the airport. I am pretty sure that I ate it at four weeks, but all surgeons are different. Just an FYI.

Thanks for the note about the Chili, I didn't see it until just now, but I'm often in an airport, and we even have Wendy's here in Panama, so the Chili will make a good food choice if we are out and about. I did have a chili at home over the holidays, but the quantity of Beans made it quite frustrating....something about kidney Beans are still hard on the system.

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