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overeaters anonymous



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Hi all,

Just wondering if any of you ever attended overeaters anonymous? There is a meeting close by and I was considering going to help me deal with my eating problem in conjunction with my sleeve. I couldn't tell from the website whether it cost or not. Did you like it/ did it help? Are there any other support groups you would recommend?

Thanks- Elly

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It is a very good program. It is based on the same 12 steps that AA and other meetings are based upon. They don't charge a fee, but donations are recommended as they usually have to pay the location where they are and they give you literature. When I attended OA, it was with a group that was newly formed and there was no one there that would have been considered "in recovery" yet so it was like attending an alcoholics anonymous meeting where everyone is drunk. I would say go to a couple meetings and see if it is for you. You have to be humble about it and be willing to share who you are, etc. Whether it is OA or another support group, I think anything that helps you address the reasons WHY you developed such an unhealthy relationship with food rather than just the food and exercise bits, it can only bring you good things!

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I agree with wannalise. OA is a good program. Usually donations are $1 or $2 per meeting. Go to a different meeting if the first one doesn't fit. Each meeting has a slightly different feel. Also, sometimes open AA meetings can be good as well. Just substitute food for alcohol or the drug of choice. I have attended several different 12-step meetings over the years and they are a wonderful tool to get at the real issues behind our unhealthy relationships with food.

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I have been going to OA meetings since shortly after my surgery. I find it very helpful. I attend a fairly large group on Saturday mornings from 10-12 noon. It helps me to be around people who are dealing with how they emotionally relate to food and eating. I give it a thumbs up.

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Okay! Thanks for the reviews. I will definitely give it a try :)

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I went to the website for overeaters anonymous and read their 12 step plan. There was a lot of talk about God and realizing that a higher power can help us...that doesn't work for me. Does that tend to be the way these meetings go?

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All twelve step plans do have a component of God or a higher power, but that needs to be what you identify it as. That can be a God if you choose, that can be the Universe that is bigger or grander than you, I have even heard of people giving their "will" over to a McDonald's happy meal box. A lot of it is easier to do if you can find someone who has found success with the twelve steps and who would be willing to do step work with you. It is an excellent program and can work for those who have no belief in a God, but who recognize that there are things bigger than they are.

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I agree with wannalise. The program isn't religious if that is what your concern is. The idea of a Higher Power is what you want it to be. For some it is a religious God, for some it is "The Universe". It's whatever works for you. The meetings are more people sharing about what is going on in their lives and how that relates to their compulsive behaviors.

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The element of God within 12 step programs is referring to spiritual health and faith in God or a Higher Power. There are no references to any particular religion. or religious belief. God is referred to by many as their "higher power" implying an intelligent life force that embraces the totality of being. Most refer to "God" as their "higher power" some refer to God or their higher power as a "She". Here are excerpts quoted from the AA/Alcoholics Anonymous, Big Book which is the origin of all 12 step recovery programs:

Pg.47 WE AGNOSTICS

"When, therefore, we speak to you of God, we mean your own conception of God. This applies, too, to other spiritual expressions...Do not let any prejudice you may have against spiritual terms deter you from honestly asking yourself what they mean to you. At the start, this was all we needed to commence spiritual growth, to effect our first conscious relation with God as we understood Him. ...We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. 'Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?'...upon this simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built."

Pg. 68 HOW IT WORKS

"...We trust an infinite God rather than our finite selves...We never apologize to anyone for depending upon our Creator. We can laugh at those who think spirituality the way of weakness. Paradoxically it is the way of strength. The verdict of the ages is that faith means courage...All men of faith have courage. They trust their God. We never apologize for God. Instead we let Him demonstrate, through us, what He can do. We ask Him to remove our fear and direct our attention to what He would have us be. At once, we commence to outgrow fear."

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Thanks for the replies! I definitely don't think that would work for me. I'd much rather give myself credit for my accomplishments than a higher power. :)

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Its not so much that you are giving God credit for what you do, it is just an acknowledgement that your addiciton to food is greater than what you can overcome on your own. I've seen twelve step programs work really well for some people, and others find that they need to take their journey in a different direction. I think if you are always seeking to understand yourself and your motivations and make this a positive learning experience then you'll be golden. Its essentially a support group and you've got loads of support right here!

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Its not so much that you are giving God credit for what you do, it is just an acknowledgement that your addiciton to food is greater than what you can overcome on your own. I've seen twelve step programs work really well for some people, and others find that they need to take their journey in a different direction. I think if you are always seeking to understand yourself and your motivations and make this a positive learning experience then you'll be golden. Its essentially a support group and you've got loads of support right here!

I'll hold you to that, b/c once I get the surgery I'll need all the support I can get :)

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You got it! I wouldn't have it any other way.

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I'll hold you to that, b/c once I get the surgery I'll need all the support I can get :)

You will get support from lots of us - whether you have surgery or not. I find that this board just "keeps me going" if you know what I mean.

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You will get support from lots of us - whether you have surgery or not. I find that this board just "keeps me going" if you know what I mean.

Thanks :) and btw, I drive a Mini Cooper myself!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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