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In tears and scared



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I've been debating and debating and debating about this and hope for some help. I am jumping through hoops with my insurance and Doctors here and come to find out that even with my insurance with my deductible and 20 % of 26,000.00 I am going to spend just about as much as I would with Dr. Ortiz and here I'm going to have to be on a diet for at least 6 months. So, I've been checking into having done in Mexico. My husband has been very helpful usually, been married for 24 years and all for this and said I could use savings that we've been saving for him a big garage. That was sweet, here's the problem. He made the comment today that, well, If you don't think you can loose it on your own you'll just have to take that chance of having it done and dying that so many. I was floored and in tears. I wasn't scared at all until he made that comment. I started thinking I have 2 kids, 21, and 19, and my first grandbaby. If I did die it would be my fault, but guys, I've tried every diet in this world. I can't loose it. I'm 41, 5'7" and weigh 258 pounds. My life is horrible. I sit on the sidelines and watch. He's not overweight at all he has no idea.

The other question is what happens if say I get home and God forbid, something goes wrong, I've heard the Doctors here won't touch you if you have problems. Does anyone who's been through this have any help.

Please, I'm desperate.

Thank you in advance,

Sherri

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Do you rresearch and be comfortable with your decision and your Dr. Every surgery has potential for complications.

The Dr.'s in ther U.S. will treat you even if you are banded in Mexico.

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What is your hubby saying ? Is he scared of you dying from the operation or from not having it done and then you would risk dying from complications from obesity ? I wasn't really understanding the comment he made.......

I feel the same as you about having tried all the "diets and tricks" that I could think of and yes, I took off hundreds of pounds over the last 20 years and then put them back on as I could not seem to control the amount of actual HUNGER I felt almost all of the time. I knew I could never lose the weight and KEEP IT OFF at this point, so I opted for the band and had it done 4/18/2006. My life has changed as I am almost 40 lbs. lighter already ( including the pre-surgery loss) and I am not real hungry as I had a fill last week. This is worth much more than a GARAGE, in my opinion, because if you have the procedure done and lose weight you will look and feel better and will most likely extend your lifespan/quality of life. Woudn't he agree that is more important ?

I am no expert, but from what I have read, having the surgery closer to home may be best because of the frequency of weigh-ins , fills, etc. I have been back to the surgeon 3 times and going again next week for check-ups and to be sure my fill is ok. How would you do that as often if your surgery is in another country ? Travelling back and forth would be costly and time-consuming.I feel it is important to be fairly close to your surgeon in the event of any complication that may occur too.

The hassle with insurance companies can really be a big PAIN IN THE arse, but don't let it discourage you ! Play the game exactly as they ask you too and hopefully, before you know it, you are approved. I had 6 mos. of a dr. supervised "diet" and waited 7 mos. total until I was approved. It was, in the end, worth it.

I understand your "honey" being upset with the idea of maybe not having a chance at the garage just yet; especially because he could not possibly understand what it is like to be obese and all that goes with it. He cannot fathom being so out of breath, or not being able to cross his legs, or not being able to say NO to food, or having to watch others engage in activites since he cannot possibly run or play, how it feels to climb just 1 flight of stairs, how it feels to choke and not be able to breath at night, the wheezing, the bad lower back, the aching joints and the damn embarrassment of all who stare, make fun of and are disgusted by the FAT !!

Maybe he needs to take a long hard think of how the quality of your entire family's relationship will change for the better with this life-changing surgery. "If Momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy " !!!!!!!!

I wish you the best and tell your honey to read up on this procedure, read up on testimonials and let you live your life to the fullest ! GOOD LUCK !!

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I know there's a big debate about this and some people will disagree, but I wouldn't for a moment even consider surgery in Mexico. I come from a medical family and I know the standards are not the same there as they are in the US (that's not to say there are not poor doctors in the US as well). I don't want to get into that argument because I know some people have had good experiences in Mexico, but if I were you I would wait the 6 months and get it done here.

Every surgery is risky but in relative terms, this one is rather uncomplicated. I was scared beforehand, wrote a good-bye letter to my family, etc., but I am so happy now that I had it done.

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Have you looked into Jaime Ponce, in Dalton, GA. Not as far away as Mexico...and last time I checked--like a couple of years ago, his prices were VERY reasonable. Most importantly, he is VERY experienced.

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My two cents is: I was near 38 & at 251 before I got the band. Please go to a local recommended Doc. It may cost more but the possible problems you will avoid will way out way the cash in the long run.God Bless

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If you can get your insurance to pay for it, go that route. Why?

- They will pay for complications and they may not if you get it done in Mexico.

- You are likely to have your fills covered, and they might not be if you get it done in Mexico.

- Even if your Mexico doc covers fills after the surgery, you still have to get to Mexico to get them done.

- If you have an immediate need you have a doc to go to. I don't.

- They likely have a support group or other ways of supporting you. While on-line is nice, it isn't the same as having a live person to talk to.

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I had my surgery in Monterrey, Mexico with Dr. Roberto Rumbaut. The hospital he performs surgery in is one of the hospitals designated for use by the President of the United States if a hospital is needed while he is in Mexico. The San Jose Hospital was the nicest, cleanest hospital I've ever been in - the U.S. hospital where I had a different surgery several years ago has NOTHING on this place - and that was in VERY affluent North Dallas, Texas. I have a "live" person to talk to anytime I want, day or night. If I have a question or a problem, I call my doctor directly - I have his cell phone number. If he's not available immediately, his associate DR. Horatcio is available, I have his cell phone number too. If I ask, Dr. Rumbaut himself will call me back as soon as he IS available. Additionally I have a nutritionist, a patient advocate and a whole office staff of people willing to help me out when I need information or advice. My fills and unfills are free for life if I choose to go to Mexico to have them done, but instead, I researched and found a highly reputable doctor here locally who I use for my follow-up care. If I hadn't been able to find a doctor on my own, Dr. Rumbaut, who proctored LOTS AND LOTS of U.S. doctors who are now performing this surgery in the U.S., would have used his contacts to locate a local doctor for me. If I ever need to have my band removed, Dr. Rumbaut will do it free of charge. He will also replace a port if need be, free of charge. In fact, EVERYTHING related to my band is covered by Dr. Rumbaut for life. Its true, I will have to pay for the hospital if I need surgery again but I can handle that.

I'm not trying to be ugly, but its always better to make comments based on things you KNOW about rather than what you think you know.

Having said all that, mysherrijo, I think you should do what YOU think is best. If the surgery is going to cost about the same amount of money, you might want to have it done closer to home. After all, its not a race. Lapband weightloss is slow and steady so waiting the six months and having it done here might make more sense for you. It would be easier to have the doctor who performed the surgery be available for your follow-up care, just because you won't have to locate and research ANOTHER doctor stateside whom you trust to care for you. I understand that once you've decided to go through with something, you want to do it NOW! lol Thats normal. But honestly, what were you doing six months ago? That was December! See? Six months is not that long.

Do what you think is best, but first and foremost DO LOTS OF RESEARCH. Don't choose a surgeon based on his location or availability. Choose a surgeon for his credentials and certification. Don't be a guinea pig for a new lap band doctor to practice on. Do find a surgeon who will give you references from patients - and talk to the patients. If you do choose to have surgery in a foreign country, find a reputable doctor locally for your follow up care BEFORE going to have the surgery. It's pretty important.

mysherijo, I wish you the best of luck on your weight loss journey.

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I agree with DonnaB and in addition...

Being on a diet for six months is going to mean weightloss, right? And the reason you're wanting the band is so you can lose weight, right? So, this is the beginning of your weightloss journey. It's not a delay.

It is your decision, but if it were me I'd be chosing someone close to home so I had aftercare and then I'd be spending that saved money on a new wardrobe or a nice pair of boobies *winks*

Best wishes in whatever you decide.

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Well, I have to say that I feel for the hard decisions that you have to deal with.

I had my surgery done here in the US, and I am self pay. I don't think that I would have any reservations about the quality of Mexico doctors, but I did have concerns about after care, fills, complications, etc. Yes, the cost in the US is a bit more, but my US Dr. covers one year of aftercare, fills, etc. Add up the cost of fills (they can be very expensive), travel to Mexico, etc., and the US cost isn't all that much more. And you have a little more peace of mind

As far as taking a bit longer to have the surgery in the US, so what is six months? Use that time to diet as you have probably done in the past. Only this time, the weight will stay gone because you will have the band. Gone is gone.

I don't know what kind of person your DH is, but from that "dying" comment he sounds a bit manipulative. Like he knows what strings to pull. The garage? Hell, you are worth more than any garage. (Like I am worth more than any new car I have ever owned or will own.) I am truly sorry that he laid that one on you. That kind of guilt is so uncalled for and you don't have to accept it.

Please, dear, don't let some "guilt-laden" comments and a new garage stop you from the rest of your life. You will be able to live your life with and for your family. If you don't have your health, what is there? Sitting on the sidelines ... if you are lucky?

I say, put yourself first this time.

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I know there's a big debate about this and some people will disagree, but I wouldn't for a moment even consider surgery in Mexico. I come from a medical family and I know the standards are not the same there as they are in the US (that's not to say there are not poor doctors in the US as well). I don't want to get into that argument because I know some people have had good experiences in Mexico, but if I were you I would wait the 6 months and get it done here.

Every surgery is risky but in relative terms, this one is rather uncomplicated. I was scared beforehand, wrote a good-bye letter to my family, etc., but I am so happy now that I had it done.

It's funny that you say this. Did you know that your doctor was trained in Tijuana by a Mexican doctor. Acutally by the same Mexican doctor that Sherri is considering.

Kat :grouphug:

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Maybe your hubby is just worried. Does he know that the risk of death is not nearly as high for lap band patients as it is for RNY patients?

I have never actually heard of anyone die from Lap Band surgery on all the lap band boards I go to, but I have heard of several from RNY.

Maybe all he needs is a little more info.

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Hello,

I kinda had the same situation... First of all I do not live in the US..I was going to go to Mexico as it quick to get an appointment/ surgery. Then I did a bit more research and got in contact with my insurance company to see if they would pay . My insurance company told me they would pay 100 percent if I went to one of the "in network" hospitals. Did more research and contacted a few places and found an excellent place to get in done and in network!!! Four weeks later I was banded with no money out of my pocket. With all this said if I were you I would do the six months diet , save some of your money and get it done close to home. It is better to have any follow up with the surgeon that is close to home AND performed the surgery!! I know how you feel that you are ready to go, but take your time and get it done close to home!!

I hope this helps ...Hang in there

Peace and love

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Before I had my surgery, I was very emotional and worried whether or not I was making the right decision. I too, was worried about dying, which I imagine is pretty normal to worry about before having any surgery!

What helped me to feel a little better was to realize that there are many things in our normal everyday life that we could get seriously injured or die from. Like driving to the grocery store for instance! Life is full of risks, and you just have to be careful in what you do. I was scared of flying, then I realized that you have a larger chance of crashing in your car than the airplane!

I decided to have my surgery in Mexico because I was sick and tired of sitting on the sidelines, as you mentioned, and I didn't want to wait any longer. After doing some reasearch, I chose Dr. Arturro Rodriguez in Monterrey Mexico. Once I got there I was treated like royalty. I stayed in a 5 star hotel: Quinta Real, which was included in the fee, and they took care of the transportation to and from the airport and to and from the hospital. I can call my doctor, directly, any time day or night and any one of his staff too. I have the Swedish lapband, and YES, I've found doctors here in the the States that will do the aftercare on the Swedish band as wells as the Inamed. Although the Swedish band isn't FDA approved here - yet - doctors ARE permitted to treat anyone with the Swedish lapband it just depends on whether that particular doctor chooses to or not. Maybe you could post where you live and we could give you some doctors to contact so you can get more information regarding the aftercare in your area.

Keep your chin up. This is a very big decision you're making!

((HUGS))

Anne

banded 5/15/06

Dr. Arturro Rodriguez

Monterrey, Mexico

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I don't ever post but this debate has made me want to post. I went to Mexico to be banded and I would do it again. The hospital was like a resort hotel. The care was fantastic! Dr. Kuri has done over 2,000 lap bands. I have only been banded since march of this year and I have lost 35 pounds. I would not trade this band for a garage or a new car! This was the best decision of my life. Good luck.

Ronda

225/190/140

DOB

3/3/06

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