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Worried I am Going to Fail :(



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You know the feeling when you start a new diet (ie Atkins) and join a forum and tons of people are having great success? And you give it a go and barely lose five pounds? And you wonder what is wrong with you?

I am worried that this is going to be the same old story :(

Any others felt the same before surgery and suceeded with the lap band after trying every diet in the world?

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You know the feeling when you start a new diet (ie Atkins) and join a forum and tons of people are having great success? And you give it a go and barely lose five pounds? And you wonder what is wrong with you?

I am worried that this is going to be the same old story :(

Any others felt the same before surgery and suceeded with the lap band after trying every diet in the world?

I feel the same exact way! My surfers not until end of September though so no success YET!

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I felt the same way but kept telling myself that the difference is this is NOT a diet. It's a new life with my band. A tool i worked very hard to get. You still have to diet and exercise trust me, but the band helps with that so you have a much better chance of success. You can do this!! Good luck.

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Hi there, I worry, too -- will I be able to do this, is it right for me, etc. As I wade through the process (which is much longer than I thought it would be) I have time to over-think absolutely everything. Basically, I am counting on the statistics -- the overwhelming success rate. It's not as fast as other WLS and maybe no everyone reaches goal for one reason or another (I intend to!), but it works. I imagine that I will enjoy my three one-cup meals per day and still do the cooking I do for others (I love to cook) but that the difference will be in that feeling of satiety -- it's the missing link. When on a diet, I am unable to be satisfied. The band will allow that. I am not afraid of the hard work because I know how to do that -- it's just the hard work without lasting success which has been so exhausting, demoralizing. I imagine the hard work paying off and the scale going down, down, down and me getting healthier and having lots more energy. Energy that I can turn into exercise and the lifestyle changes I so need. Just know we're all in this together -- you're not alone.

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Yep, I was terrified of failing before surgery. I am almost a year out, and only started to be somewhat more confident of succeeding about 3 months ago! I am what is called a "slow loser" and learning patience, along with actually getting to the restriction part of the band journey, so that it truly acts as the tool I was told it would be, were very difficult for me. Now that I have the tool dialed in to my needs, I am finally changing my eating habits and feel like I am on solid footing as far as future weight loss.

So, fearing failure is normal, based on all the posts I have read here and on my own experience. Just like you say, some folks who have the surgery will lose 100 pounds in an hour, the rest of us will lose very slowly, don't let that intimidate you. The healthier you will absolutely love you for being brave enough to go ahead with surgery and start the journey!

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You know the feeling when you start a new diet (ie Atkins) and join a forum and tons of people are having great success? And you give it a go and barely lose five pounds? And you wonder what is wrong with you?

I am worried that this is going to be the same old story :(

Any others felt the same before surgery and suceeded with the lap band after trying every diet in the world?

Fear of failure is quite common, and you won't know the success you are capable of if you do not make the attempt to be successful.

Please learn early on that you can create undue negative feelings of failure if you compare your weight loss journey to others. We are all individuals, and as such will not have identical weight loss journeys.

My life with the band has given me a life skill which eluded me for years...patience. If you follow the rules as given to you by your medical team, you will be successful. I have experienced some complications along my journey, and am losing weight slowly. I am focused on that the scale continues to move in the direction I want it to, not at the speed which it moves.

There will be days when you will be less compliant than others, and you may from time to time encounter weight loss plateaus. It is important to stay the course and stay in touch with your reasons for opting for this surgery. The weight loss will happen...all good things in time.

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I think we all worried about that. I didn't stick with anything I'd tried before, although I had success with phentermine there was a point where that stopped working and the doctor kept trying different combinations of pills to get the same effect...which did a number on my internal systems. I eventually gained back all but 15 of the 60 lbs, I'd lost on that. The band is a whole different ball game though. This was designed for people like us - please don't worry about failing, you'd have to do some pretty absurd things to do that, such as: drinking milkshakes, eating sliders and just not caring about what your body is telling you. I'm lucky in that I can no longer tolerate many sliders: chocolate, ice cream, Cookies, cake...stuff that had kept me fat all along anyway. Yes, I miss being able to nibble on a Hershey's bar but the consequences of me doing that are so undesirable that I don't even think about it anymore.

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When you first get banded, you have to have a plan and goal and see your surgeon often for fills especially in the first year. You also have to be very motivated and optimistic!

You can do this!

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I went into this four years ago with confidence, absolutely sure IT would work. Notice I say IT would work. I wasnt so sure about myself, as I had failed at dieting several times. .... but this HAD to be different. It was surgery! Initially, I was doing fantastic....I was. But that waned, just the same as every other time I was "in charge". After FINALLY giving the band a chance. ....we, together can't fail now. Never, ever give up! Best wishes.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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